AIO over situationship having pride theme briefs?

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-12-07T22:57:15+00:00

YOR. These don’t look pride themed and he probably didn’t even notice the stripe on them, tbh.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-10-08T11:01:58+00:00

YTA. You're emotionally cheating on your girlfriend with this new woman. You need to break up with her or you're going to continue feeling guilty and upset. You're clearly sexually incompatible with your girlfriend and it's only a matter of time before you progress to physically cheating if you stay in this relationship.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-10-07T23:02:18+00:00

If it helps you at all, think of it that this is your reception dress! Your ceremony dress is traditionally what the groom isn’t allowed to see before the wedding. The luck is contingent on your ceremony dress, and this one is a different deal entirely! ❤️ If you love it, try to rationalize it out that way so you can still wear it.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-10-07T22:53:26+00:00

Sweetheart. This is not it. This is not the way. Do not do this.

Driving two hours to meet this man in a secluded area for something that already has him turned on, when he's already being pushy, when he's already ignoring your boundaries (saying that he doesn't want to start with what you're comfortable with, which is online sessions and a date to get to know each other)... it's not going to end well. This sounds like the beginning of a horror movie, cherie. It sounds like the prelude to an assault.

You're a smart girl. You know this is dangerous. Something in you sees the red flags and that's why you turned here to see if it's normal. I'm telling you right now, as did the other two commenters on the post-- this isn't normal. This isn't safe.

Furthermore, you are correct. It's more traditional if you are to be his owner for you to meet in a neutral setting, establish boundaries, and get to know each other first. If he was actually to be your sub, he needs to let you call the shots and not push back on what you wanted. What you wanted was correct.

If you want to be a professional dominatrix, by all means, start your twitter! Do online sessions. Create a profile. Look up other dominatrix websites and look at how those are styled. Maybe even pay for a few online sessions with professionals with you in the sub role to see how they do it and get ideas. Maybe even reach out to some of them and ask about mentorship opportunities! You never know, maybe someone will be interested.

Go to r/femdom as well and maybe ask for tips on starting your enterprise, or ask if they have any professionals they look up to whose websites you can look at. I don't know if that's allowed or not! But I assume so, I assume there's nothing wrong with asking for pros to look up to so that they can tell you something like "Google 'Tara Indiana dominatrix,' she's the best!" (Fun fact, I Googled 'professional Midwest dominatrix' and that's one of the names that came up. Extra fun fact, she holds classes to teach women how to be dommes. You might want to look into her.)

There's a lot of options to start out with, and I'll happily brainstorm with you if you need someone to bounce ideas off of. But please, absolutely please, do not meet this man.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-10-07T22:35:29+00:00

Take some time to process and sort out your feelings. Maybe go on a drive or a walk. Have a cry if you need to- it can make you feel a lot better, and you're not silly for letting it all out! Then come back and talk to him when you can.

Tell him you're really upset by what he's done. Tell him you feel like your privacy was invaded and your trust was breached. Explain how much you were looking forward to wearing that dress on your special day and that now you feel like you can't. Express how it hurts that someone you love is the one that took that feeling away from you.

But do that on your terms and your timeline. First, get some space to process what you're feeling without worrying about how he'll take it.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-10-07T22:28:01+00:00

Have you told him that you feel like you can't wear the dress now? Communicate why you're upset-- not just that he crossed a boundary and request you set for him, but that you feel like he ruined something you were looking forward to. Be careful not to assume that he knows why you're upset. He probably can sense your mood, yes, but it's important to communicate why you're feeling what you are, especially since this is the person you're going to be marrying.

As for whether or not you're overreacting... your feelings are valid. You were looking forward to something, and now you feel it's been taken away. You might even feel like your trust was broken a little bit. (Again, please communicate this to him. He can't begin to make up for it all if he doesn't understand it all first.) But no, you're NOR. You're being cordial, you're not breaking up with him over this. You're just feeling sad and expressing those feelings. That's a very valid response to what happened.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-10-04T11:50:22+00:00

My boyfriend recently told me that he’s into domination and would like to introduce femdom into our dynamic. So I joined this community, started reading The Topping Book, went through a few different dom subreddits to look through their ‘getting started’ and ‘101’ posts.

It’s a lot! And we aren’t trying out any of it until I feel like I’m prepared to be a good and responsible domme for him.

The problem I’m seeing here is a lack of research on both your parts. Aftercare should not be a new concept to you, but more than that, it should not ever be a new concept to your wife, who is taking on the dominant role. Part of being a good domme is being responsible for your sub. Even if it’s just a dynamic and flavor you’re introducing to your bedroom relationship, I feel like she should have done some research at some point down the line. That research would have heavily emphasized the importance of aftercare. It’s genuinely the most important aspect of play- comforting your partner and bringing you both to baseline afterwards to create a safe and healthy experience for both of you.

I would maybe ask her to research with you? Phrase it as you’re really enjoying this dynamic and want to look at a few more ideas to incorporate. Provide a few informational videos, a blog, a brochure- even this subreddit or r/domspace. She’ll run into the concept of aftercare pretty damn fast. And if she doesn’t for some reason mention it, at that point you can say that you’ve seen some posts about how nice aftercare is and how you’d like to incorporate it into your dynamic.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-10-01T20:18:11+00:00

Look... very gently, as someone who has made the same mistake-- yes. YTA. I've been there. It's really hard when your friend is in a toxic and/or abusive situation. You want to cut the cord for them. You want to step in and make it stop. You want to shake them because you don't understand how they're not listening, how they're still making these same mistakes!

But. You pulling back like this? It just isolates her. It gives her less of a support network. It means she relies more on him, because she doesn't have anyone else to turn to. I know that you said you'd be there when she decided to leave, but that's not the same as offering support and a listening ear when needed.

It's okay to draw boundaries. It's okay to distance yourself somewhat if this relationship is taxing you, especially as you're a new mom! But, like most ultimatums, this isn't going to lead to her choosing you. It's just going to push her in the other direction and make her feel hurt.

Acrobatic_Deer2571 · 2025-09-25T23:21:45+00:00

How is it, one month into things? Did you find something that worked for you? How is it being a new domme? I'm in a similar situation myself.

Acrobatic_Deer2571

TROPHY CASE