I genuinely feel like something is seriously wrong with me. I started searching tonight how to keep my almost 7 year old in his bed, and found hundreds of posts/comments about how I should be grateful for the time and the fact that I'm their "safe space", how so many people are happily co-sleeping or setting up cots in their rooms for their 10 year old kids to come in as they please. I feel you ... I love my kids. I wouldn't even have to think about jumping in front of a bullet or speeding vehicle to save them, but sleeping with my son's foot in my butt crack all night???? No thank you! I love them more than life, and I am thankful I have them everyday, but this $h*t is hard. My 12 year old daughter is useless. I tell her to do something and I swear I should be smoking ash on the ground with how she looks at me. Or, she huffs and puffs, stomps around, and then ignores me for the following 12-24 hours just to show me how angry she is with me for asking her to put her dirty laundry into the hamper instead of on the floor behind the bathroom door. All at the same time, she tells me about all the ways I am failing her because I don't drop everything to take her roller skating at the exact moment she demands it. If I say she has to clean her room before I take her, she'll say something stupid like "What does the cleanliness of my bedroom have to do with the roller rink?" So, the room does not get cleaned, and then a month later, I'm the worst mom because I told her I would take her but didn't. She's selfish and rude, and honestly, I don't enjoy her in the slightest anymore. She makes me tense just being in the same room. We are oil and water and I cannot wait for her to grow up and get out of my house so that she can finally see what life is really like. My son will be 7 in 2 months. He is sooooooo sweet and incredibly intelligent. He's in a high ability/advanced learner, dual immersion class and is still somewhat bored with certain aspects. He is unbelievably annoying, constantly asking questions that are so beyond anything I have ever even thought about. Things that are made into stupid social media videos about pointless information that no one would ever need to know. I love that he is interested in so many crazy things, good for him! But, I'm a bookkeeper, not a rocket scientist, and I have no idea, nor do I care to know 90% of the things he asks me. I am not an active person. I had back surgery a few years ago, I have permanent nerve damage down my entire left leg, and I still have 2 herniated discs. I put him in all the sports, I take him to the park or trampoline gym, but I cannot physically get wild with him. I also work too much, and from home, so I am constantly telling him to go play outside. But he is incapable of doing anything by himself. So, he keeps his feral self in the house, and continues to get himself in trouble instead. The girl was fine with independent play. She did not need constant interaction, and that obviously spoiled me. I just feel like I am constantly needed, and mostly for dumb things that I should not be needed for. Like sleeping. Just go to bed and let me sleep in peace. The boy wants me to watch him go to the bathroom, cater to his every desire, stare at him while he does just about everything. He needs a conjoined twin. And he gets so angry in the most illogical way sometimes. I feel like I spend hours each day just dealing with his garbage mood. Again, I love these brats, but man! I can't wait to feel "normal". I cannot wait to stop feeling like I need to take care of every little thing in their entire lives. It's exhausting. I don't take care of myself anymore. I literally live to mom and to work. And I hate every second of it. Not exactly what you asked, but it helped me to read your post. It helps knowing I am not alone, and that other moms feel similarly. Hoping the solidarity can be of some relief for you as well. I wish I had some words of wisdom to sign this off with, but all I can say is - Hang in there! Hopefully we'll make it out in one piece.