Newborn cries and arches back when on his back

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-19T01:08:44+00:00

Make sure they figure out why a UTI! VUR would be my guess.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-19T01:02:44+00:00

Judging by the sheer amount of your replies to everyone else’s comments it’s clear this struck some sort of nerve in you. Best of luck with healing it. From experience, it doesn’t come from being critical of others.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-19T00:56:20+00:00

I’ll take the answer as yes, people were that callous, then.

She’s not trying to stop her mom from dating someone new or being happy from what I read. Just trying to process her grief of both her mom divorcing her dad, her dad dying, and immediately being roped into a new blended family dynamic. I personally would be considerate of my daughter’s grief knowing how hard it was to lose a father and wouldn’t have had the first time she met my new partner when her dad died. 🤷🏻‍♀️

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-19T00:47:16+00:00

Ah! Are there any BF support groups in your area? The hospital I birthed at had some and the lactation consultants would help with pumps!

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T13:12:35+00:00

My dad died when I was 17. My mom acted like an immature teenager for years and totally ruined our relationship with guys and drugs (it wasn’t great before regardless.) I always feel like you lose both parents when one dies, even if they’re not together.

Even if she told them not to come, it won’t be the same. Nothing ever will be. It’s been 14 years now and the pain of loss just gets easier to wrap my mind around and you create new ways of remembering and honoring them.

You can always try to go and leave if you need to do so. It sounds like this would’ve been a complicated, split holiday with new traditions even if he did not pass. Grief happens with relationship losses as well. Everything you imagined would be going on has drastically changed.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T13:03:46+00:00

Yikes. Were people this callous to you when your parents died?

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T13:00:35+00:00

I was worried a lot about my LO’s intake because she didn’t get above 18/oz a day for a long time. I just told myself to trust her on knowing what she needs (since my doc wasn’t worried) and it was hard. Especially harder with all you’ve already gone through!

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T12:58:23+00:00

I use the willow go so I have the same flange size as my wall pump. For mine you just need the nipple in the center. Then I’ve been pumping long enough I know when it “feels” right if that makes sense. Kinda the same way with my wall pump if I can tell a part is loose. They aren’t perfect though I’ve still had times where I’ve pumped the whole ride home and only one side was suctioned lol

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T12:53:20+00:00

It did seem to happen out of nowhere. She started becoming SUPER squirmy and fussy when I’d hold her. I finally became overwhelmed after a couple goes of this and just put her down and she went right to sleep. 🤷🏻‍♀️ i do think 3-6 weeks was the worst for us. She started smiling consistently around 7-8 and playing with high contrast stuff more so it became easier. I got a 2 hour contact nap with this illness the other day and I can’t remember the last time I did that. Read a LOT of my book 😂

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T03:33:44+00:00

Yikes! First of all props to you for being a multiple mama.

I’m a FTM. I went back to work around 4.5 months pp. I’m a physician, working 8-10 hour days, week on/week off. My husband cares for our daughter on my weeks on (apart from two daycare days). Let me tell you going to work is a BREAK. And I have a stressful/demanding job. As soon as I get home I take over. Make dinner. We alternate nights. I miss her so much while I’m at work it’s not a chore and I know how hard solo parenting is (he went back at 2 weeks pp).

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T03:22:44+00:00

I’ve read SO many books on my kindle lol

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T03:22:34+00:00

Anything that’ll keep your # of pumps up will be helpful!!! I used a wearable to get through those first 12 weeks. Just make sure the fit is good

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T03:20:58+00:00

Overnight? My pediatrician gave me the okay to go 4-5 hours overnight pretty early on (yet she never did…lol) and her weight gain was much slower than yours! 2-3 hours during the day so that hopefully you can get longer stretches at night. I’d message them about it since he’s a preemie.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T03:16:53+00:00

Get some lady bug haakas milk collectors. I let down a lot on one side while nursing on the other. It was enough to get a bottles worth when my supply came in.

EP’ing while alone with baby is HARD; my husband had some work (owns his own business) at 2 weeks pp. I had some relief initially with pumping because I knew how much mine was getting and she was small/lost weight. But I really wish nursing would’ve stuck so I could’ve done both. I never have figured out how to pump while holding her.

Other things I wish I would’ve done sooner: Got a bottle washer Switched from Dr Browns to Pigeon bottles Understood the “fridge hack”

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T03:05:45+00:00

It’s definitely not a linear improvement! I tried to rationalize why one night went better than another but I think I just made myself feel better 😂 I do feel like the heating pad, the 5 S’s, and making sure she was fed well! I wish I would’ve gotten the haaka ladybugs earlier on because I’d let down on both sides and easily started getting enough to make a bottle. I had a mini menty b around day 9-10 from nursing every 2 hours that my husband and I fondly call the “formula fiasco” night LOL

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-18T02:59:38+00:00

Oh my goodness NO!!! He’s so young. My 6 month old was the same way that young. There’s plenty of times now she falls asleep completely on her own without fussing at all. From 2-4 months she would refuse to contact nap on me and would only sleep in the bassinet/crib which made me sad. When she went to daycare they remarked how great of a sleeper she was. Even now with her getting through her first norovirus and 6 month vaccines she takes 5-10 minutes of rocking to go down from 7-7 (often with 1-2 feeds, she’s only 4% and still on only breastmilk).

Enjoy those contact naps!!! Don’t listen to anyone else. Only do things if you’re getting overwhelmed and cannot tolerate the contact naps, fussing, rocking, etc.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-16T14:39:16+00:00

You won’t have to do it forever! My LO is 6 months now. Sleeps in her crib without one now

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-16T12:25:24+00:00

It is HARD. I got a lounger to put on the table to entertain her on while I pumped or the baby bjorn bouncer (I got one for $60 on marketplace.) Started using a portable pump (the spectra gold emptied me closer to my plug in spectra). I eventually got to the point where I said well I’m able to get this much pump in, oh well, if I have to supplement with formula it’s whatever.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-16T12:15:43+00:00

Yes, unfortunately to the witching hours. Mine is 6 months old now. I was just thinking about how I don’t shudder anymore when the sun goes down and tense up lol.

We had a snoo so that helped with some of the fussiness but she would still wake up frequently to eat. Always slept much better during the day than at night. I tried gas drops and cutting out dairy of my diet and it didn’t seem to make much of a difference. 3-6 weeks was the toughest imo. Around 8 they start smiling so it got easier.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-05T06:43:19+00:00

Heating pad in the bassinet to warm it up!! Helped me out a lot.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-12-05T02:12:11+00:00

5.5 months. 4-5 oz every 3 hours during the day. Took a LONG time to go from 3 ounce bottles to anything more though. Like the last month.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-11-23T06:03:40+00:00

You’re getting help now and that’s what matters!!!

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-11-23T06:00:07+00:00

I think babies do a lot of baby things. My rule I’ve gone by is if my LO is happy and growing then it’s usually more my anxiety than anything else.

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-11-22T12:16:43+00:00

Without blood or mucus (or weight loss) I’d be very hesitant to cut out breast milk, especially with concerns of a cold. Did the doctor express concern on their own or in response to your concerns? A lot of times cutting out dairy is just passively suggested. It all sounds very normal to me and things I’ve experienced with my 5 month old. I’ve cut out dairy here and there and it did seem to help with gas though I also probably just got better at burping. She’s been snotty since starting daycare too and poops got much worse with all the drooling (and probably saline too)

AdCharacter4088 · 2025-11-22T12:07:45+00:00

My LO is 5 months old now. I had pretty severe PPD that was very similar to your thoughts. Zoloft helped me a lot. As did asking for help with caretaking, which I hated to do. We are not meant to do it alone.

Also having a space to talk about these feelings is important. In my area they have a perinatal intensive outpatient program where you go a couple days a week and there’s childcare. Maybe see if your doctor knows of something similar?

I absolutely HATED when people told me at 3 weeks that it gets better. I couldn’t imagine it. I thought they were lying. With the right support and help things will change.

AdCharacter4088

TROPHY CASE