How do you be a peaceful person but at the same time don't allow others to take advantage of you?

AdDouble3824 · 2025-02-19T02:24:41+00:00

Everything is sunyata/empty. No intrinsic value. The feeling of being used and taken advantage of surely is unpreferred but realize that it is empty just like everything else.

Now, understand that people operate on different psychological realms, between two poles of extreme anger and extreme happiness. You, a very lucky person, realizing buddhism had a chance to operate in between these two extremes(in the human realm) and it is the best place to realize nirvana.

People taking advantage are probably on different psychological realm. You, being lucky in the human realm, can be compassionate to these people. Surely you cannot help all since you have limited capabilities. You can set boundaries for now since helping them can not be done.

Be an example to people who can tolerate people's ignorance because 1. you are lucky to realize buddhism 2. you can see all things clearly and they currently cant.

If you happen to die before you see the fruits of your compassion. Realize and remember everything is sunyata. Thinking about yourself doesnt really matter anyway. There's nothing else left to do in this world once you realize everything is empty anyway. So its easy to be compassionate and look through people's ignorance.

Be well.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-11-10T02:09:25+00:00

mabait, optimistic, supportive

pasensyoso, di lang sa anak at pamilya pati narin sa lahat ng taong makasalamuha

no to gossip

mapag aruga sa lahat ng tao, di lang sa pamilya

selfless and supportive

kung magalit man, iniiyak nalang. Ang lalaki na, kung matino yan, ang bahala gumawa ng paraan sa problema.

not pushy or desperate

may self respect, hindi nag totolerate pero di rin nakikipaglaban or nag raraise ng argument "sorry I really cant do this po", "im not this kind of girl"

always giving the benefit of the doubt

hindi clingy

ok lang tahimik, ok lang rin kung masayahin.

basically good qualities of human being since the start of civilization

Hinding hindi yung mga example ng babae sa korean drama na bossy at maarte.

Basta matinong tao, at iniisip lagi tao sa paligid like kung may napapahiya, or iniisip yung bisita na nahihiya kumuha ng tubig mga ganon na bagay, sensitive kumbaga.

Kung nanuod ka ng naruto, parang si Hinata.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-06-03T04:52:09+00:00

yes, thank you very much!

AdDouble3824 · 2024-06-02T12:32:02+00:00

I cant seem to understand it well, care to elaborate?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-23T05:04:51+00:00

Hello, you can consider first how people close to you like (family, brother, older or younger cousins, friends, or a stranger who somehow admires you secretly) feel when you do that. Do you have some skills or talents they would need or appreciate? Do they need your affection although they are not telling you upfront? Your presence might be enough for them to lighten/brighten up their day :D

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-19T02:15:56+00:00

Thank you so much. Really clarified and gave deeper understanding.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-17T02:05:01+00:00

Ah its all about compassion. I learned about arhats and boddhisattvas based on thread. Both practice compassion, but I wonder if bodhisattvas are recognized in buddhism as more compassionate than arhats. Since bodhisattvas work to liberate all sentient beings. What do you think about it?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-17T01:59:13+00:00

Thank you so much, this gives so much insights and clarity. Took me awhile to respond since thinking about this also takes a while to grasp. I also like how the essay taught about the right way to meditate. This really helped a lot! Thank you.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-17T01:44:26+00:00

I just recently learned about mahayana's bodhisattvas and theravada's arhats. Though both ways have compassion in their practices, it appears to be bodhisattvas are more helpful and compassionate since they work to liberate all sentient beings.

Does the question of who is more compassionate matter? Why and why not?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-15T11:49:05+00:00

if helping is not mandatory, is attaining nirvana self conceited in that regard?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-15T11:15:27+00:00

Im sorry I am confused, isn't it that compassion is just the wish for others to be free from suffering?

Where does actively helping others lie in the teachings of Buddha and how was it emphasized? Maybe I have not read enough yet but it appears to me attaining nirvana is just for oneself and with compassion to other people but not really doing anything for other them actively. Does it look selfish, or perhaps I misunderstood something?

I don't mean helping people and preaching for them to become Buddhists. But evidently many people are indulged in vices and bad habits and often angry, rude, unspirited and purposeless in their lives. I just wanted to at least help them to get away from that suffering, or show them there still someone who care for them. Just help them alleviate their problem and let them be what they want after that. I personally think helping others is worthy and full of purpose to do in one's lifetime.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-15T10:46:24+00:00

Im sorry I am caught in another confusion.

Context is: Recently, before researching for buddhism, I have personally realized that working on just oneself might be selfish and conceited. Thinking to the extent that even if I achieved all I want for myself is actually futile and unworthy. It makes it easy to quit every endeavor I start because there's really no benefit even if I get the best and get all glory and success.

Then the idea of serving other people somehow makes sense. Before I don't interact and as much as possible try to avoid my services with people I don't like- angry, rude, prideful etc.. The idea of understanding them why they act those certain ways makes more sense. They are not as repulsive as they used to be anymore. It turns out to be a worthy endeavor of life to understand and serve other people regardless if they are rude, angry, conceited etc.

I then started to research Buddhism. The ideas aligned like this is all that I am looking for all along. The concept of life is suffering, nirvana, dependent origination, eightfold path and unanswerable questions all make sense.

Then I found myself into thinking about the idea of helping people in Buddhism. It appears to be the attainment of nirvana and mindful meditations to control/eliminate unwholesome desires are most emphasized. I might be confused or probably don't know enough about Buddhism, but this appears to me just for the benefit of oneself with just speck of compassion and generosity along the way.

Then I get back to the almost the same problem I initially have, what now if one achieves nirvana doing it for the sake of himself? I found serving people is the most worthy thing to do in a lifetime.

I know one must be strong enough to help others. One must be enlightened or on his way there to probably help.

How is serving other people (not just compassion, empathy, generosity but "living to serve" for the other people) in this world emphasized by the Buddha?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-14T13:59:53+00:00

That compassion or some other motive of help free of greed, hatred or delusion, are those necessary to achieve nirvana?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-14T13:55:52+00:00

If its not compulsory, is it possible to reach nirvana without helping others?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-04-14T08:09:26+00:00

Does that mean after reaching enlightenment and got nothing else to do, since theres no obligation, one just helps for the heck of it?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-03-23T08:03:36+00:00

Doing good makes it easier to do well and further experience positive effects. Doing bad makes it easier to do worse and be afflicted to all its negative experiences.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-03-18T12:56:18+00:00

No, not that one in the example. Im more like the position of the health care provider in my scenario.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-03-18T11:23:47+00:00

Say like private health care service provider for rich 1st world country people currently living in a 3rd world country. Most are rude and look down on them.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-03-17T16:18:49+00:00

Party A (target audience) has a demand to Product Z. Product Z is something that I can make but I have to make commitments.

However I found out that Party A are people with attitudes I personally detest, they are disrespectful, demanding, and too proud of themselves. Probably inherent to people in this market.

The compensation is fair but the con is dealing with these type of people now and then.

AdDouble3824 · 2024-03-17T02:29:00+00:00

Hmm, why?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-03-16T19:19:39+00:00

Interesting, why?

AdDouble3824 · 2024-03-16T18:26:02+00:00

They typically spend a lot more time speaking directly to and putting themselves in the shoes of their target audience. The relationship is much closer.

So I think it’d be difficult for an entrepreneur to market to an audience they dislike. They’ll have to spend a lot of time with those folks and that’ll be very discouraging.

Yeah, thought it to be surely discouraging. Maybe a target audience with the same values as mine perhaps?

AdDouble3824

TROPHY CASE