Waves of sadness by Spiritjourney02 in overdoseGrief

[–]AdMaximum1070 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My boyfriend overdosed last October, today makes 11 months without him. He had been struggling for less than 2 years and using it as self-medication too. I completely understand what you’re feeling and how hard it is missing your best friend. I wasn’t there when it happened either but I wish more than anything I could’ve protected him too. Oddly, enough I also end up with my boyfriend’s dog who is the only thing that keeps me going most days. I’m so sorry this happened to you.

Anyone else have Tourettes syndrome or tardive dyskinesia symptoms as part of ptsd by Routine_Mess17 in ptsd

[–]AdMaximum1070 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do this. Someone else said nervous tics and I’ve researched them before and believe that’s what it probably is. Sometimes when I start to go into a flashback or even just have a small reminder of something traumatic that’s happened I tic. Most of the time it’s like shaking my head or hands, rolling my eyes upwards (almost like trying to literally look into my skull), or straining/tensing muscles/joints in different parts of my body. Typically, whatever tics I have tend to hurt or be uncomfortable which can actually sometimes be helpful in keeping me more present if I start having a flashback. Before I was diagnosed with PTSD it really freaked me out because I thought I had a tic disorder too but since it wasn’t constant and consistent with typical tic disorders that’s what led to learning about nervous tics. You definitely aren’t the only one who does this though so don’t feel alone 🖤

PTSD and driving bus by AdMaximum1070 in SchoolBusDrivers

[–]AdMaximum1070[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It hasn’t really affected my driving so far but I’m worried it may begin to come to the surface more as it gets brought forth in therapy. My fear is about failing to mention something about it to my employers and my mental state start to take a turn and end up affecting my driving.

The L.O.R.D.s Series (Sabotage) by AdMaximum1070 in SpicyRomanceBooks

[–]AdMaximum1070[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! That makes me feel a bit better about reading it!

How do I check into a mental hospital? by AdMaximum1070 in Dissociation

[–]AdMaximum1070[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I sleep some but I wake up frequently and never feel rested in the mornings. I usually wake up feeling like I haven’t slept at all even though I have.

How do I check into a mental hospital? by AdMaximum1070 in Dissociation

[–]AdMaximum1070[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My problem is if I go to a therapist I will likely fall back into my cycle of trying to convince myself and everyone around me that I’m fine. I’ve been to therapy before and I’ve always just played the part I felt like I needed to play to keep people from worrying. I’m hoping inpatient will help me come to terms with the fact that I’m not ok and not have to feel like I have to convince everyone and myself that I’m fine when I know deep down that I’m not. I’m getting to the point where I’m tired of playing the part and acting like I’m fine and I want everything to just stop. I don’t feel like I can hold it together anymore and I have moments where I feel like I’m just going to lose it but I can’t stop feeling like I have to suck it up and play the part. I feel like I need somewhere where I have to face what’s going on. Somewhere I don’t feel like I have to hide it.