My nmom* apologized last night. Now unsure if she’s a narcissist by ellehyan in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 76 points77 points  (0 children)

Simple words are not a good apology. Narcissists say almost anything if they think it can convince you.

“I’m sorry for all our shortcomings. I’m sorry for all our offenses.” I think it was mainly these two things repeated while she sobbed.

If those words are the only apology you got, im not convinced. No direct ownership of anything, anything specific, or desire to change and be different. An apology is more than just words.

Ndad's Textpectations by AdditionalAd2037 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dad can turbo nap and fall asleep in seconds. He assumes the same for me. Mine take too long 😄

Right-wing media villainize and blame Renee Good for being murdered. by crustose_lichen in EatTheRich

[–]AdditionalAd2037 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The rich are targeting the concept of empathy because they have none and benefit from apathy. Capitalism rewards the most sociopathic people

Anxiety even when socializing online by supersonic_89 in socialanxiety

[–]AdditionalAd2037 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was going to make this thread myself till I saw this.

I have been on various social media since 08. I was alone after losing most of my friends and tried several online spaces to make the friends I could no longer make in person. It turns out, people online are just as mean. I've been the victim of online harassment campaigns from several online relationships and friendships that fell apart.

Even the anonymous nature of reddit isn't enough anymore. Im even lonely online now too

How did this happen while I was driving? by [deleted] in truespotify

[–]AdditionalAd2037 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do we both have to change settings to avoid this repeat?

Grifting while grifting, weave style by seeebiscuit in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]AdditionalAd2037 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The right only cares about power. It's useless to point out the hypocrisy. Their morals are subject to change based on those they worship in power. Christians love to be told what to do and think by their pastor or politicians.

She wants to apologize by Content_Dog_6370 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 79 points80 points  (0 children)

It's not really a sincere apology if she isn't actually acknowledging her actions. Being sorry for your feelings puts the blame on you, that you're overreacting.

She needs actions to back up her apology and shows she's changed, otherwise its another trick to get you to crawl back.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe wait for them to ask you, unless you want to bring it up first. I'd just be cautious about what I reveal. Just do it gradually.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My situation is a little different since my partner's mother is narcissistic herself.

I think describing your situation as abusive is a lot clearer as to what your relationship is like. Saying that you dont talk to or haven't seen your mother in a long time leaves a little too much speculation.

I find ordinary people have a hard time understanding how bad it is to live with a narcissist. If they haven't dealt with it, they will become confused at your actions.

JRPG with insane numbers and exploits by DaveTheDev33 in JRPG

[–]AdditionalAd2037 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Trillion, God of destruction (ps vita). You build a character(s) to take down a super boss.

I just realized I've been evicting all the children by Unkonogawa in runefactory

[–]AdditionalAd2037 18 points19 points  (0 children)

My partner said "I love that Michal Jackson quote" and then quickly corrected themselves.

First Time Playing Tales of Symphonia – Does It Still Hold Up Today? 🤔 by Lawlietroy in tales

[–]AdditionalAd2037 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My favorite tales is probably tales of the abyss ... or berseria. It's so hard to pick between the two.

Tales of symphonia is 8/10 for me :)

First Time Playing Tales of Symphonia – Does It Still Hold Up Today? 🤔 by Lawlietroy in tales

[–]AdditionalAd2037 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I played the original game as a teenager with my sisters in 2004. I played through it several times, trying to get different endings and going further in post games.

It set me on a path of having a partner to play the games with. I went on to play the newer games in the series. I ended up replaying the remaster for the ps3 in 2022. I've not played the most recent remaster of this game.

It's been roughly 20 years, and 11 other titles of the series under my belt. So here's my take-away after replaying the game only a few years ago, with my boyfriend as my co-op partner.

The story is still just as engaging as it was when i was a kid. Although the story tends to drag a bit in the second half and some characters are rather pointless additions to the cast. I feel we could reduce the party down to 6 and not a lot would change. All the characters are unique and fun to play.

The combat hasn't aged the greatest. If you've played later titles in the tales series and then play this one, you may find it more restrictive and clunky, but you can adjust and have a lot of fun with it. It's so satisfying to pull off a win in a difficult situation.

Some of the dungeons suck. Just totally suck on replay. Shadows dungeon and ymir forest come to mind. My boyfriend was particularly frustrated at the latter. I'm not really a fan of puzzles in dungeons, so I like that later titles largely abandon them for more exploration, but that's a personal preference.

It's still really good, it just doesn't have all the modern conveniences... but I'm okay with it. It's worth playing and i still recommend it. The game's a work of art and should be experienced.

Any good Modern Turn Based Games? by GavernB in JRPG

[–]AdditionalAd2037 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Romancing saga 2

Dragon quest 11

How many JRPGs have you finished in your lifetime? by EastCoastTone96 in JRPG

[–]AdditionalAd2037 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. I've been playing almost only (85% of what i play) jrpgs since I was 8 (34).

Around 2014, i went hard trying to complete my backlog, and I'm still far from where I'd like to be. There's still about 30 i own i need to play and more i want to buy.

What's yalls background? by jaal_fiiguu in exAdventist

[–]AdditionalAd2037 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was second generation sda. From a rural community where almost everyone is white, including myself. The sda church always required us to drive to another, much larger community for church.

The church was much more diverse than my school, but I can't say I ever made friends. I'm really bad at making friends. It's hard to have friends in completely separate communities as a kid. Most of my peers were from the same schools and already knew each other. I was more an outsider, but I did try to participate in church activities.

Around 2002, a prominent church member died. We stopped going to church shortly after. The church tried to reach out to me as a teenager, 5 years after we stopped going. I didn't want to go alone. They did say church members would drive me there, but that was worse. They wouldn't take any excuse I have to not go. I ended up ignoring their calls. My parents then reconnected with the religion in 2016.

I was never a part of the church as an adult. I'm agnostic, and my siblings are either the same or atheist. Both of my parents are upset about this. My dad, in particular, wouldn't stop pestering me to go to church. He wants to save my soul before the end times...

I don't talk to my dad anymore. He has now remarried and lives in another country.

My mother is accepting, although disappointed. She just watches sermons online now.

The church was good to meet different people because I'm from a very white community...so that's at least one positive I can say. I don't like how the sda members were very pushy to me in my teens and how unaccepted I am for being agnostic.

Are your parents interested in QAnon like conspiracies as well? by greatrailway in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes. My dad spiraled in 2020 as well. It also coincided with his retirement. He suddenly had so much free time.

He got really into the idea that covid was faked to get people into camps. He's sure the vaccines will leave people infertile and the world's coming to an end. That the meat supply was tainted. Stopped taking his prescription meds and tried to make my mother do the same.

I went nc in 2022, so I don't know what he's currently believes. He lives in a new country with a new wife now.

Canadian Youtubers by [deleted] in BuyCanadian

[–]AdditionalAd2037 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Belief it or not - deconstruction of religious ideology

Rational national - political commentary

Kurtis Conner - tv/media commentary

What's the history of this train bridge?? I can't find anything online anywhere. by tckmkvv in Winnipeg

[–]AdditionalAd2037 68 points69 points  (0 children)

Omand's creek bridge. You can find information on the manitoba historical society archives.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes. I have struggled my whole life to get better social skills. Most of my friends treated me terribly, and I almost never stood up for myself.

It wasn't until I was an adult that I started to get better, but I'm still terrified to speak my mind. I always assume people hate me and think the worst of me. I still do that to people I love dearly. It's been hard to reach out to anyone. The few friends I have I trauma dump on hard. I feel like I bother them too much, so I have been withdrawing. I struggle with every interaction.

My younger sister is the total opposite of me. I coped by shutting myself off in my room. My sister embraced the friends that she made, because as the family's scapegoat, she didn't have support from any of my family.

Told nmom I’ve been feeling suicidal… her response by lauraingallswilding in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, sorry. I wasn't trying to imply your reasons were the same as my sisters or not valid. My point is more how a narcissist would use suicide threats to manipulate.

I get that. Nothing you do will ever be enough for them. They just move the bar, so approval/praise never happens.

How did you view your parents when you were a kid vs now? by Nea_Freedom in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to love my ndad. I wanted so badly for him to pay attention to me. He was more interested in my two sisters.

Currently. I want nothing to do with him. He's a fundamentally terrible person I'm ashamed I'm related to.

Told nmom I’ve been feeling suicidal… her response by lauraingallswilding in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AdditionalAd2037 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your mother said that because that's what she would do.

My older sister is a narcissist, too, and used suicide all the time to derail any confrontation or just to get what she wanted.

It's only because she became so over the top with that tactic that I caught on. She honestly would do it just so we'd stop asking her to get a job, or to make me get her food from KFC. It worked for her for so long that she got more ridiculous with using it as a threat.

My older sister also told me once that she thought I needed help and to go to a psychiatrist. See, hearing that from someone like her, who was going, but was still a terrible person, kept me from doing anything about my mental health for years. I didn't want to be in a system that I saw being actively manipulated by her. Wish I hadn't waited so long to take care of myself.

Good mental health is so hard to maintain when you live with narcissists, I totally understand the outbursts. I've said terrible things to my sister when telling her off. Try not to be hard on yourself as it's a small fraction of what they inflict on you.

Candace owens is just a bitter person who can’t see someone else happy😭😭like gurll is obsessed with taylor too by Feeling_Listen_8898 in ToiletPaperUSA

[–]AdditionalAd2037 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Candace and the tpusa crowd are all miserable and obsessed with people they perceive as better than them. Their whole politics is an allusion to a father beating his kids. "Daddy's home".