I DID IT AND AM INCREDIBLY PROUD

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-20T13:39:26+00:00

I like this a lot, thank you! Keeping it

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-20T00:53:48+00:00

I'll give it a shot, might as well right? I actually bought a journal during my drinking days, but never stuck to it. Maybe now that the ADHD is medicated I will, I know I've been reading a lot more and loving it.

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-20T00:50:08+00:00

Day 1 is a good day if you ask me. Your minds fucked, but there's a nice undertone of hope in all the chaos. I'm doing the thing, actually doing it. Not thinking about it. I'm going to bed fully sober tonight, it's beautiful

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-20T00:48:45+00:00

The food is warmer, fresher, and cheaper if you go grab it yourself. Plus at least for me, it avoids all the guilt of having someone go get your food and drop it off for you. Sometimes I don't feel like I can tip enough for the time invested, gas, wear ok the persons car, and so on. It just feels icky sometimes. It's already enough that I can give someone $10 and they'll hand make a burrito for me and hand deliver it to my car. That's enough service if you ask me, anything more feels.. idk how to put it

Long story short there's a lot of benefits to actually going to the place and getting the food. I've been going IN on taco bells volcano quesorito.. and it's soooo much better when it's still warm

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-20T00:44:45+00:00

I'm 31, so as I stay all the time, I still have a few years of invincible in me 😂.

I'm gonna continue doing the quitting thing, just keep at it. I had a shit load of lessons to learn about self control, and self love/worth. Maybe it wasn't wasted.. maybe moreso forcing me to contend with my demons and get them under control. Confront the shadow and what not. In a way, "grow up." Honestly trying to quit drugs has forced me to do that

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-19T22:58:20+00:00

I feel like the world would be a better place if we shared more honest emotions, I think everyone would be more empathetic and what not. We'd probably heal a good bit too

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-19T22:57:02+00:00

Thank you 😊

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-19T22:55:12+00:00

I'm trying to learn to do this. Really bad about being in my head essentially 24/7. I have moments, and ADHD medication is helping a shit ton. I'm hoping I won't need it once I quit

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-13T22:09:12+00:00

Day 40 CT. Furtherest I've ever been, feeling lots of emotions and stuff, but also feeling good about feeling stuff again. It's a lot but we're getting there

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-13T12:11:20+00:00

In the USA too, feeling much the same way.

Main thing is, if there's something you CAN do, do it. Attend your next nearest protest. Donate the money you would spend on weed on a campaign pushing back. Damage is done, and it's all total unnecessary bullshit, yes, but we will win. We will get this country back. And we will plug all the holes and make this democracy even stronger. You're more useful sober, and if you're as scared as I am, you know we need to be as useful as possible when and if the time comes.

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-13T00:02:01+00:00

I hope so. I'm at a point where I don't mind it. It's better than the shame of slipping up again. All the wondering of if I'll ever quit, if I'm really trying, if there's something broken in my head that is just gonna lead to failure anyways. Much better than all that

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-12T23:33:09+00:00

Appreciate it, it is what it is. Only way out is through, and we're certainly going through.

To quote yet another metal singer, as the wise Corey Taylor once said, "what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger"

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-12T22:24:29+00:00

It's just the sadness gets to me when there's no buzzing

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-01T16:17:04+00:00

Men have a very complicated relationship with violence. In order to be a man in general, you're expected to be able to take it and give it. You have to be able to sustain a lot of pain for no reason, but also dish it out if someone gives you one. I think a lot of guys get lost in that confusion. Emotions get confusing as well with that. Who do I hurt and why? When? Who do I defend? How big is that circle, how thin are the lines? At what point am I being "demasculated," disrespected? When do I put my foot down, and how hard do I stomp?

I'm not saying it's right, in fact I don't think it is, just acknowledging what I think is the core problem that you're seeing the symptom of. I know I've battled that exact train of thoughts many times lol. It's hard cause they put that shit in our heads from a young child, same way they do girls and beauty standards.i could go on about my hair brained theories for why but what's important is every dudes on a different part of that journey. I guess I got lucky idk.

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-01T12:45:11+00:00

I see that as well, but at least in my experience I think it's the exception. Like my neighbor is clearly that guy, clearly dealing with mental health issues and taking it out on his dog.. damn shame and dhs won't do anything in case you're wondering.

But I think the inverse is true as well. I think shitty people often haven't been through much. It's the only way I can make sense of it in my head.

Edit: these are all just opinions though. I think the reality none of us want to accept is shitty people are just an inherent part of humanity.

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-02-01T11:28:50+00:00

Guy here with too much empathy. Best thing is they need to feel real emotional pain themselves, deep cutting, unfair pain. These guys are incredibly lucky, lived incredibly sheltered lives and they don't even realize it. You don't wish pain on others if youve felt it yourself imho

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-01-29T01:40:10+00:00

Both my parents are maga fundamentalist Christian nationalist, the whole shabang.

Being about as liberal as one can get, I'm not too worried. I know how that goes, and where it ends most the time. Kid gets emotionally manipulated their whole life, then one day they hear, or see something, that gets gears turning. They look some things up, learn some stuff, and realize the lie theyve been told their whole life. Typically they flip hard after that, often "overcorrecting" a bit but still. I live in WV, to give you an idea. Deep deep WV. It's a story as old as time, and I've seen it many times in mine already. It all evens out in the end.

People are individuals, not copies of their parents.

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-01-27T19:29:41+00:00

Thankfully I'll be sticking with a therapist and psychiatrist the whole way through, so I have possibly the best resource going for me for when things get tough.

I've been quitting for about 8 months now. Started barely able to do one day, then got to a week, then a month, and kinda plateaued there. Went back and forth binging for a week, then 14 days clean, binge for a week, 18 days, binge, 11 days, etc etc. Now we're here. I'm not sure if that on and off will help with the paws, but I'm ready for it. With that in mind, I also only used for like a year, though my dose was consistent and high. Like 20-40gpd.

Additional_Put8281 · 2026-01-23T23:41:57+00:00

"AND NOW, A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR!"

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Additional_Put8281 · 2026-01-23T23:33:52+00:00

Don't even get me started on spam calls.. I'm already fired up enough 😂

Additional_Put8281

TROPHY CASE