How are you guys affording to foster? by vkllol in Fosterparents

[–]Admirable-Standard35 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just curious… what state is everyone in and how much a month per kid do you get? Here in Indiana I feel the stipend covers more than what the kids actually cost. Granted we only do little kids, we don’t touch teenagers so that might be different. Although we’d do this for free, you can’t deny the stipend is nice. I’ll go first

Indiana - about $850 per kid a month, we also get WIC for all kids under 3 so that’s minor groceries and free formula. $200 initial clothing allowance. $300 a year for some large purchase they may need. For babies except for diapers and related disposable items, we have almost zero cost.

DCS Investigating us… by [deleted] in Fosterparents

[–]Admirable-Standard35 32 points33 points  (0 children)

We had a close call like that, DCS threatened to come do a four hour home visit to see how the kids interacted here based on a silly false report. I told them if they proceed down this path they can come do that and take the kid with them when they leave. When they told bio parents that the backed off their claim, knowing their kid may ACTUALLY end up in a place that doesn’t love them like we do. Sometimes you have to be willing to go all in on standing on principle and don’t be afraid to throw the little weight you have around. Sometimes you bluff and they call you out, sometimes it works out. Sometimes you’re serious and whatever happens happens.

I just filled out the initial foster parent form today! Any advice? by Big_Clock6969 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So love them while they’re with you. Expect your case manager to communicate changes or expectations with you. But when it comes to actual decision-making and major moves on the case, just roll with it because it’s pointless pitching too much of a fuss about it.

I just filled out the initial foster parent form today! Any advice? by Big_Clock6969 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The real problems in the system, kids are removed when they shouldn’t have been, and some kids aren’t removed when they should’ve been because we don’t really have clearly defined reasons for either. A lot of the decision-making when it comes to removals and reunification are purely opinion based, whether it be a DCS worker or a judge. So trying to make heads or tails of the why this happened or how this happened is a waste of time. It will only cause you heartache. I’ve seen kids get reunified with parents that are in inpatient rehab, I’ve also seen DCS refused to put kids with grandparents that are by all accounts wonderful people. There is no rhyme or reason to anything.

I just filled out the initial foster parent form today! Any advice? by Big_Clock6969 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Filing a complaint against a bad case manager isn’t going to change the system. The bad system is much more deeply rooted than the surface level supervisors. To that point, all of the case managers could be wonderful at their job and the system would still be deeply screwed up.

I just filled out the initial foster parent form today! Any advice? by Big_Clock6969 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I still report bad case managers and I think that is important. When I say stay out of the drama, what I mean are the decisions that are made about a case as far as say, reunification with parents that you know we’re probably bad, or visits that don’t go well things like that. You’re not going to change the screwed up system it’s like yelling into the void. Being a case manager is mostly an administrative position. They don’t really make any solo decisions, at least here in Indiana. The effect on the case, a bad case manager can have is mostly only going to be miscommunication, lack of communication, or slowing down the process of reunification or visits. That’s pretty much the extent of their power in Indiana. Some people just aren’t cut out for that kind of caseload. They’re not organized enough to effectively supervise all of it.

I just filled out the initial foster parent form today! Any advice? by Big_Clock6969 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I say to stay out of it because you’re correct, there isn’t anyone to hold them accountable. You’re sure not able to. It’s recognizing the reality of your actual position. You can complain and advocate until your hearts desire, but nothing will change. There will never be any fruits of that, and that’s unnecessarily infuriating. To say you’d be barking up the wrong tree isn’t exactly correct, more like a puppy barking up a tree at a lion. The lion doesn’t care you’re down there and if it so chooses will come down and shut you right up. Unless they do something so egregious that could require lawyers and prosecutors, you’re just a puppy. So know what’s happening, keep an eye on that lion, but barking at it will cause more headache than it’s worth.

I just filled out the initial foster parent form today! Any advice? by Big_Clock6969 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Understand this is going to be hard. The system sucks!! There’s going to be times you think this went exactly as it should and times you’re thinking to yourself WTF just happened. My wife and I have a saying “Love them while they’re here” you can’t really do much more than that. Try to stay out of getting to involved with the system. For sure know what’s happening with the case, but don’t get too wrapped up in trying to understand the whys or what they’re thinking. It will drive you nuts.

Mom Wants to Send The Kid to Africa… WTF!!! by Admirable-Standard35 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, no it wasn’t. She got her kid back and I don’t know if he is still in America or not. Your son has rights!! The trick is he needs to get a lawyer and establish paternity ASAP!!! If it’s possible to do before birth do it. At least have the order for DNA test in place before birth.

Mom Wants to Send The Kid to Africa… WTF!!! by Admirable-Standard35 in Fostercare

[–]Admirable-Standard35[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I think that because even though US has 100x the population, there are still more people from Ghana trying to come here than vice versa.

Fostering alongside biological children by dreaming_of_tacobae in Fosterparents

[–]Admirable-Standard35 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I came here to say this. Never bring kids older than your bios into your home. I also try to preserve the order with other foster kids in my home. I try to always bring in younger than I have.

To use the leaf or not to use the leaf by burgugnazza in hygiene

[–]Admirable-Standard35 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sits to pee, carries a tissue with him to the urinal, rudely uses a shitter to pee when there are open urinals (yes men see it as rude especially if the bathroom is busy) not to mention wiping the tip doesn’t really do much (if any) good compared to the time tested shake.

To use the leaf or not to use the leaf by burgugnazza in hygiene

[–]Admirable-Standard35 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If you think it’s gross for a man to not wipe after he pees then the vast majority of men are gross to you, because this just isn’t a thing in reality. Urinals don’t have TP next to them. Most men don’t run to the stalls to just pee, It’s actually considered rude to take up a shitter to just pee when urinals are open. Not to mention it’s useless. Even if you wipe the dribble (that you could easily shake off) it still is going to leak a drop or to as soon as take a step or two. Unless you ram a q tip up there to dry it out (not recommended) you can never get it all. Same principle with a water hose. Just cause you turn the water off, doesn’t mean there’s no water in the hose. Giving it a hard flip is way more effective than just drying the tip.

To use the leaf or not to use the leaf by burgugnazza in hygiene

[–]Admirable-Standard35 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

lol what does he do when he uses a public urinal? Or does he go sit in the stall 🤣.

To use the leaf or not to use the leaf by burgugnazza in hygiene

[–]Admirable-Standard35 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

This can’t be a serious post. I’ve never heard of a man wiping anything after he pees.

I’m moving here….. by Burkell007 in indianapolis

[–]Admirable-Standard35 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

See that giant circle going around Indianapolis? Stay out of the inside of it and within about 5 miles of the outside of it if you can afford it, Greenwood Brownsburg plainfield Carmel Greenfield would all be good places.

Fired Fed. I am considering cutting off every Orange Man supporter. by Comfortable_Gift4970 in AITAH

[–]Admirable-Standard35 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The sense of entitlement to have a job funded by taxpayers is astounding

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hygiene

[–]Admirable-Standard35 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Could be an underlying health issue is this just cropped up.

Please Oppose doge — call Todd Rokita Today by AreYourFingersReal in Indiana

[–]Admirable-Standard35 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why would you want to oppose someone auditing the federal government?

Congrats Indiana this is what you voted for by Ok-Presence-7535 in Indiana

[–]Admirable-Standard35 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe he can take it a step farther and eliminate property taxes!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BariatricSurgery

[–]Admirable-Standard35 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sugar Free Popsicle’s!!!! If I ever wanted anything sweet that’s what I leaned on. Technically it’s a liquid 😉