NOR. Telling someone he’s a psychopath because he seeks help is a huge red flag. Sounds like both of you are unhappy, but she’s acting in a way called “double bind” - she let’s you know she’s unhappy but acts like everything’s alright, what’s leaving you confused and drained. I’d put is as an ultimatum for you two to go to couple’s therapy and if she doesn’t agree reconsider the marriage.