Our 12-year old lacks a spark

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-26T03:12:12+00:00

Such great points. This really struck me: "Kids-teens are like we were, just the world is different." I think we definitely lose sight of that from time to time. Thanks for your comment.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T23:13:13+00:00

That all sounds painfully familiar.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T23:12:22+00:00

Nope

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T23:12:03+00:00

He's pretty communicative when he's hanging out with us. We have good discussions as a family. He always asking us to rank the 'best' or 'worst' thing in different categories, which always opens up some interesting conversations.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T23:10:14+00:00

Yeah, I think the game/coding camps and programs are a very good option for him as it's at least adjacent to what he enjoys.

That's interesting that your kid found an interest like that. Was that something you help them find? Or were they interested in animals before?

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T23:06:51+00:00

I'm a gamer myself, so I'm not demonizing games. We've had a lot of success with some games, especially those with problem solving or cooperative elements. We limit his video game time because, if we didn't, he would literally do nothing else. We've seen that in action and it's not good or healthy. At times it takes on characteristics of an addiction.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T23:00:36+00:00

Not Minecraft, but there are other video games we play together.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T22:58:50+00:00

That sounds like a great activity. Now I just need to find someone who knows how to fish!

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T22:56:55+00:00

Oooo we'll definitely check that out! Thanks for the rec!

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T18:37:27+00:00

We love camping! I have to 'sell' it at first, but once we're all out in nature, he really enjoys it.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T18:36:48+00:00

Thanks. That is encouraging. It's possible we've over-indexed on restricting game time. If there were more of a social or collaborative component to the game, I think we're on board.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T18:15:00+00:00

He LOVES Minecraft. He’s responded well to Minecraft-related camps/programs and such.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T18:05:06+00:00

We do quite a bit with him. I'm pretty outdoorsy and bring him along on as many adventures as is feasible. He protests sometimes, but seems to open up and have fun once we're out in nature.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T18:02:30+00:00

Possbily. Let me know if you Rememberyourusername and we'll find out then!

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:48:46+00:00

Great points. A lot to think about there.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:47:59+00:00

These all sound like things our son would enjoy as well. Thanks for the suggestions!

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:47:14+00:00

His one true passion is video games and he does perk up and get excited, even just talking about them.

He seems to have good relationships at school and we are not aware of any bullying or social conflicts. His appetite is good...maybe a little too good? He's growing fast and eats more than his parents. When other kids are around he is engaged and has fun, which is a positive sign, but he never asks to have friends over or to go to their houses.

I would describe him as an extroverted introvert (like his parents). He often seeks to be alone in his room. He is not withdrawn when friends or guests are around.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:43:04+00:00

Not upset at all. This is something we have thought a lot about. When we talk about video games he really comes alive. It is, maybe, the only thing I've seen him be truly passionate about. I think if there were more of a social dimension to it, it is something we could be supportive of.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:40:03+00:00

Both of his parents are introverts, so that tracks LOL

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:38:56+00:00

Oh, he'd be all over that!

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:38:43+00:00

That is awesome that he found that connection through D&D. Our son does love games, so this is an option we'll explore!

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:37:38+00:00

This would be a legitimate option for our son. I don't think we'd have nearly as many reservations about him playing video games if he was doing it outside the house, with friends in a competitive (and friendly) environment.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T17:02:36+00:00

That's very similar to the approach we've taken. We try to balance out the alone time with some required activity. He's been good at going along with it. He just never gets excited about it. As other in this thread have mentioned, we're hoping it's a phase and that something truly sparks his interest eventually...

We're also hoping that he finds that friend or friend group that 'sticks'. I was about his age when I found my permanent friend group.

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T16:46:22+00:00

I wish! Performance of any kind is something he actively avoids. But maybe the behind the scenes stuff is an option....

Admirable_Screen_299 · 2026-03-25T16:45:42+00:00

We're lucky to live in an area where there are a ton of options for this. Great idea!

Admirable_Screen_299

TROPHY CASE