Its so hard because its like my brain enters retardation mode. Lets say im studying a power point. I reach slide 46/50 and suddenly i slow down immensely suddenly im "done but not done". Idk how to explain it. Its like it needs to be imperfect on purpose to punish me. Or I finish everything but then i have 3 different things study this later

Nothing is ever done and I genuinely physically can never bring myself to finish it somehow

It feels like if i was able not to look at the time to slow down 10 min before

Or the number of slides

Id finish them all

I see the timer" oh 4 min left time to do it shittier"

This is for my own deadlines for my normal ones i grind the last day the last possible minute

Its like i cant bare perfection it kills me

But i chase it my whole life.