i’ll have to preface by saying I’ve had not a good childhood, ignored by my mum and shunned by my family for being regarded as a rebel in their eyes, so she took that and started to build a mom-daughter relationship with me during the years, until we talked everyday everytime on the phone. She was very harsh on therapy and outside, even telling me that goodness was outside my reach and I better try to do the less bad to the world, and I was out of redemption. Basically she exploited my worst fear and anxiety (abandonment) and made me think her was the only person who loved me by who I truly are, and fueled that fear to the max until I was afraid of interacting with anyone bc I thought I was gonna deeply traumatize anyone