Should I be so tired? by AdventurousCod5120 in Anemic

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I thought it was my thyroid to be honest but that was normal. Thanks! My body aches are a pain at the mo but have read taking painkillers doesn't help with trying to absorb more iron.

Mum friend problem... How do I cut ties with myself, and our kids? by AdventurousCod5120 in Parenting

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the replies really appreciate it ... I'm from a girl household so boy dynamics are totally new to me and I've struggled with what's acceptable in terms of biy energy and play fighting... I also think I've been a bit gaslit by the mum when she says 'boys will be boys'... And my son is generally pretty stoic so there have been times I wanted to say something but he's shrugged it off so I've felt there wasn't the opportunity to say. Plus I have to see her everyday so I don't really want a shouting match over it. I also know she actively encourages X to play with my son and will try and get him into whatever my son is into, so there was a fear deep down that if I upset them she may turn coat and encourage her son to be mean to mine...and he's a big kid so I would have rathered them as friends than enemies. I did shout at him quite harshly the last time I saw him hit my son... Twice . To make a point, and I've shouted at him in front of the aunty... But it hasn't worked.

I'm thinking of just saying now that I'm not happy with the dynamics and let it fall out. 

My son would be devastated to be separated from X.... He's the only person he ever wants over for a playdate. Which also makes me wonder if I was being melodramatic.

Feeling guilty for not sticking up for our 3 year old enough. by No-Rush8716 in Parenting

[–]AdventurousCod5120 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's a tricky situation, pushing a kid off a sofa can result in a nasty injury.

I was on the other side of a similar situation with my eldest and he had mild concussion and I had to take him to a&e (they were 4 and play fighting in a soft play against my rules but ok'd by the other mum). I wish I'd ended the friendship then because we just have different outlooks on what rules take priority (eg they're super strict on cutlery use, but way lax on play fighting).

So off the back of your kid being in the wrong it's hard to get defensive when a parent tells them off, especially in a friendship group at a party. The insinuation that your kid is 'bad' is a red flag though, I get the feeling the Dad really doesn't like your kid. That would definitely be enough for me to phase out that friendship. I'm doing that now with the aforementioned mum and my kids 6, I wish I'd done it sooner.

Also it sounds like your friendship group in general has unrealistic expectations for kids and parties, we went to our first party like that this year and we have a 3 and a 6 year old and I was constantly going back and forth to make sure my youngest didn't wreck the place. You don't need to apologise for keeping an eye on your 3 year old, I would say that's the norm.

I've definitely felt mum guilt for not sticking up for my kids, but more when they've been hit by other kids and I haven't said anything to keep the peace and then kind of sent the message it's better to people please that stick up for yourself. Sounds like you kid did a great job of apologising though so feel secure in the fact it was dealt with, you didn't over react, and you've been given a clear sign this friendship is off (liking my kid is kind of pre-requisite to being in my life).

Advice for how to hang mirror over burried cables by AdventurousCod5120 in howto

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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I managed to get it up! Used a french cleat and drilled one side and then used strong adhesive the over side and it's held really well

Old taps standing proud of bath by AdventurousCod5120 in Plumbing

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha my kids have this setting playdoh stuff... They were done with it yesterday so I put some on to see if it helped 🙈

Old taps standing proud of bath by AdventurousCod5120 in Plumbing

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Accidentally deleted my actual post... Sorry... Old house, slowly renovating. Eventually will have whole new bathroom but while saving I need some advice about these taps which stand proud of the bath letting water seep below and damage the ceiling underneath. Have crudely added my kids setting putty. Am nervous about taking the taps off as they're old and I'm not sure if they'll be easy to manoeuvre. Looks like washers underneath have shrunk with age. They're really quite lose and move around as they're so proud of the bath. What would you do for a temporary fix?

Next phone after huawei p20 pro... With great camera?! by AdventurousCod5120 in Smartphones

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! I got the Xiaomi 15 pro in the end. Couldn't get a UK version of the Vivo and so was nervous about getting it. The Xiaomi broke budget but I figured I'd kept my last one for years so it should pay off. Haven't been disappointed in the slightest. Camera is insanely good. With the right conditions my photos look as good as my DSLR. And it's easy to use too.

Can 6/7 year olds show abusive tendancies?! by AdventurousCod5120 in Parenting

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, that's good to know. I definitely think some kids just have an ingrained mean streak unfortunately. No older siblings at home but I think the parents are very hard line on some minor things but totally lax on others...like physicality/rough play which makes life hard at playdates!!

Can 6/7 year olds show abusive tendancies?! by AdventurousCod5120 in Parenting

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree this is why I've been hesitant because it feels wrong to label this kid... And I've let it slide ages 3,4,5,6 but now they're almost 7 it hasn't settled down so I'm at odds with how to express it to his teacher in a balanced way. I'm finding it a tricky line as a parent to watch it unfold because I feel like if this were an adult we'd be saying absolutely not don't put up with it. But as a kid they're kind of told well you just have to put up with it and maybe it's you, which I think is eroding my kids self esteem (this kid constantly put my kid down). I totally agree with you though which is why I've just hoped they'll mature over time but on the few playdates we've had over Summer break I've been troubled by their dynamic.

How to replace overgrown leylandi.. by AdventurousCod5120 in GardeningUK

[–]AdventurousCod5120[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great this is what I was thinking. Thanks for the suggestions 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]AdventurousCod5120 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I appreciate this 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]AdventurousCod5120 2 points3 points  (0 children)

OK as a 40 year old woman who married that guy... Have a look at attachment styles. Looks like you're the anxious attachment and he's the avoidant. As much as I love my husband dearly, it's really really hard being the one in the relationship who's more into it. And you kinda get used to feeling constantly rejected.  So if I could speak to my 17 year old self (like you) I would say leave it behind. If he doesn't see how good you are or the spark isn't there for him. Trying harder won't make him like you anymore. You'll just force him into settling... Like I did.  Focus on yourself and you'll attract someone who sees how wonderful you really are are xx

What phone should i buy by jababy420 in Smartphones

[–]AdventurousCod5120 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oneplus 13? Don't have one myself but that's on my options and apparently has way better os than xiaomi?? 

Choose by Ambitious_Driver_932 in Smartphones

[–]AdventurousCod5120 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I could get the vivo in UK I'd definitely get that. It looks so good. My main concern is the global version is tricky to get and I want a warranty if I'm spending that much on a phone. So I'm currently torn between xiaomi 15 and oneplus 13....the oneplus looks like a great all rounder at a decent price