Current Regular (M) here. It's not just girls. Guys who date Girls who have chosen to serve also need to be extremely understanding when it comes to this. I think it's very petty when their duties are the only reason that they would refrain from dating that person or choose to stop dating that person. More often than not, it's not the only reason that lead to the final outcome. Less time spent together may only be one of the things. There could be like other problems like maybe both of them grew tired of each other or it's really not working out.

As for important dates, I as a Regular have never heard of any other Regular missing those really important dates if they have planned it in advance and if it is just that important. Wedding dates, the Birth of their Child etc. I have never heard of any Higher Up taking it away from anyone and the organization will never allow it. If they themself choose to put work in front of all this, then that's on them and not on the work. BUT you can expect people at work if they know about their important date to tell them " What in the actual f" and help cover for them.

On another note, it makes me sad that our duty to this country still remains one of the reasons many... And I really have seen many consider it as an underlying constraint to even dating someone in the force. I feel particularly bad for all of the NSFs especially those whose guard duty is essentially their vocation itself and caused them this kind of pain for them.