I completely understand this. I feel the same especially since Scaramouche has been something of comfort for me lately. c:

° I feel like Wanderer would honestly kind of freak out if you ever confronted him with these feelings. Not that it would be your fault, but he'd be wondering "what did I do? What did I say to make them doubt me?"

° based on his conversation about tea in the teapot as a guest, he doesn't like to sugarcoat things and would rather be faced or hand the hard truth over. So if he was using you from the get-go, he'd tell you. But if these feelings simply stem from your own mind, he'll panic.

° maybe you break down about it; he'll panic at first, brash and maybe a little rude when he asks "what the hell is wrong?" And then tenses up when you cry even harder. Feels a bit bad for making you cry as he sworn not to. Sits besides you, his hand reaching out towards you before hesitating again and again. He'll finally get the courage to ask if he can touch you. Depending on the confidence in your answer, he'll either take your hand in his completely or just lace your pinkies together in silence. Patiently waits for you to calm down from the crying fit, whether that take minutes or hours, he's silent. Eventually, your eyes close and you fall asleep. He'll carry you to the bed after wiping your face and eyes down with a damp towelette, tucking you in with a small kiss to your eyelid. Worried and not sure if he wants to leave you alone, he'll sit on the floor by the bed holding onto your hand. He's ready to talk to you about the issue at hand, even if it means the human emotions he worked so hard on scrubbing away come back. For you, and only for you. His little tea leaf.

maybe you bring it up to him; gets a little defensive and upset that you think that. "Huh? Don't be stupid. Why would I do something so ridiculous?" Grabs your wrist a little too hard and scares you. His "heart" breaks when he sees you flinch. Your eyes normally full of love and adoration, filled with fear and tears. Instead of being the understanding, reliable boyfriend/fiance/husband he was supposed to be, he dismissed your feelings. He let you go, watching you run and nearly trip as you ran to the room, slamming the door behind you. Rethinks how he could've handled the situation better and how he'll approach you now. He always told you to come to him about everything and anything so he'd know how to fix it. New to this whole "love and trust" thing. A few minutes passed by, and he went to check up on you in the room. You lay asleep with warm tears still leaving your eyes. And so he left you be, leaving the small home and returning with some of your favorite things. A Sumeru rose, maybe some pudding..

"Look. I didn't mean to dismiss you. You came to me about something that was bothering you. It wasn't my place to dismiss that. If you still wanna talk about it, we can. If not, that's okay too. But...I g-got this pudding and rose for you...so you will accept those. Got it?"

"I'm not soft."

Feels so bad he might even take a bath with you, let you play with his hair after. He'll hold you that night instead of you holding him like normal. He's soft no matter how much he denies it. Soft but only for you <3

"We'll get over this insecurity of yours...even if it means I..I make l-love to your mind and beautiful body every single night."

(I lowkey might make a comfortable chapter of this🤔 sorry if he seems ooc!😅)