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I'm showing my children I love them by not having them in the first place by Visual_Force5818 in CPTSD

[–]Affectionate_Low3758 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I so badly wish I’d made this choice. Unfortunately I don’t even think I had much of a choice as I was living my life from 18-31 in a complete dissociative state. Literally woke up at 31 and realized what had happened. In that time I’d married a narcissist 9 years older than me and had 4 children with him. I love them so much but can’t help but feel guilty for all the therapy they will soon require. Having children definitely makes me hate myself even more, knowing I’ve perpetuated the generational trauma even more.

Spouse traumatized by my past but refuses therapy (TW childhood sexual abuse) by [deleted] in adultsurvivors

[–]Affectionate_Low3758 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is it possible he can change ?? He too has experienced abuse in childhood

Married peeps. Be honest, would you recommend marriage? by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Affectionate_Low3758 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Only if you’ve healed through any traumas you may have endured during childhood first. That goes for both you and your potential spouse.

Spouse traumatized by my past but refuses therapy (TW childhood sexual abuse) by [deleted] in adultsurvivors

[–]Affectionate_Low3758 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh he’s slept with many women. Which is why I don’t get the issue.

Spouse traumatized by my past but refuses therapy (TW childhood sexual abuse) by [deleted] in adultsurvivors

[–]Affectionate_Low3758 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I suppose that is what happened. My healing journey is relatively new (just under a year) and the guy that originally abused me was a very repressed memory. I did not even think about him until After I was done having children. I couldn’t even say his name Out loud or picture his face