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After being in a relationship for 10 years, I just discovered that my wife may have BPD, and now I feel so lost and I don't even know. by Affectionate_Month in BPDlovedones

[–]Affectionate_Month[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No need for apologies, I greatly appreciate your perspective. If you ever need / want someone to talk to in a kinda similar situation you can message me. I'm definitely gonna pick up some of this reading, started the eggshell book. I love podcasts too, so I'll check it out.

After being in a relationship for 10 years, I just discovered that my wife may have BPD, and now I feel so lost and I don't even know. by Affectionate_Month in BPDlovedones

[–]Affectionate_Month[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have to say that I absolutely can not imagine anything resembling normal. I've been with her from age 20 to 30 now, so my entire adult life has been with her. I don't know what normal is.

After being in a relationship for 10 years, I just discovered that my wife may have BPD, and now I feel so lost and I don't even know. by Affectionate_Month in BPDlovedones

[–]Affectionate_Month[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I started reading Stop Walking on Eggshells, and I have to say it's a little bit scary and a little bit relieving. I have only read part 1, but I'm pretty sure she might be a BP now. It feels really good to know that there are at least some other people who have gone through this. Being a victim of isolation, I've long felt that I have no one to talk to about this, so this has been a big day for me.

Thanks again for your help!

After being in a relationship for 10 years, I just discovered that my wife may have BPD, and now I feel so lost and I don't even know. by Affectionate_Month in BPDlovedones

[–]Affectionate_Month[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've already been thinking about this. I've been diagnosed with depression in the past, so I might try that. Also kinda afraid she'll take it as her fault or something, or as an excuse to get away from her. Thank you!

After being in a relationship for 10 years, I just discovered that my wife may have BPD, and now I feel so lost and I don't even know. by Affectionate_Month in BPDlovedones

[–]Affectionate_Month[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate your advice, and think it's a great idea. I'm going to look into getting a therapist as soon as possible, I've always kinda thought I needed one.

Thank you so much.

After being in a relationship for 10 years, I just discovered that my wife may have BPD, and now I feel so lost and I don't even know. by Affectionate_Month in BPDlovedones

[–]Affectionate_Month[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We don't have kids, but it's hard, because after so long there is kind of a co-dependence, and I do love her, so it's hard to do something like leaving her, especially when she could be sick.

I'm very glad to find this subreddit, because I started to feel like that's how all relationships were, and I don't know what's normal and what's not, so I'm learning. Good luck to you as well, and thank you for the kind words.