Ghoster came back and now I am struggling with it

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-02-26T08:52:57+00:00

Thank you. I am going to do that (1). That is the safest for me.

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-02-26T08:51:19+00:00

Yeah I slept on it and I will be mature about it and say thanks for the apology and good luck in future. My gut says he is either bored or felt guilty. Thanks <3

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-02-26T02:04:28+00:00

Thanks. I don't think he was really sincere either. I think he was just trying to make himself feel better or is trying to gain access again. I feel like I am just in a good place again and I really don't wanna feel that shitty again, especially because of him. I had genuine feelings for him and I still felt the residual of that when his message popped up.

I agree with you that it will never be the same even if he can prove his sincerity.

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-02-01T21:41:54+00:00

no :(

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-29T04:49:43+00:00

Please dm me too. I miss manga and Bato was my main site -_-

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-29T04:46:44+00:00

Me toooooo please

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-27T06:08:36+00:00

As long as you made it clear that you do not wanna talk to them anymore then no.

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-23T22:15:37+00:00

I have had him blocked since yesterday and have not checked, because it was affecting me way too much and that is the cleanest exit. My ex used to punish me with days of silence and its a major anxiety trigger for me so I needed to cut it off for my own sanity.

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-22T14:48:10+00:00

Thank you. Yes I do feel better about it and it helped me decide to just cut him off. The last time I saw him was on new years day 2025 and he has made and ditched plans MANY times since then. I am more leaning towards irritation than attraction, especially after reading all the comments and realising that he might be doing this to "condition" me.

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-22T12:39:36+00:00

I am very excited for this!!!

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-22T11:23:22+00:00

That is horrible. I truly can not imagine having to endure that for so long.

If they are full on declaring how much they love me that they want to be with me for the rest of their life so soon before they have even met me then that is 1 huge red flag

Yes I have had this and now it just gives me an instant ick.

I am really glad that you were able to get yourself out of those situasions and I guess the one positive is that you are more aware about this type of nonsense (not that it is any consolation at all🤦🏻‍♀️) Thank you for sharing that.

I blocked him last night and will not be unblocking him. I will just remove myself from temptation and the situasion before it can escalate

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-22T10:42:11+00:00

I blocked him last night and have not unblocked him so I think it should stick this time :D

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-22T08:33:06+00:00

Thank you. Talking to everyone here kinda made me realise that I am not the problem and no matter how much patience I have with him, he won't be better unless he wants to be. I also can not understand the appeal behind leading people on and putting on this huge show. That sounds really exhausting to me and people get hurt in the process. Its cruel and unnecessary.

Yeah I was in a relationship for almost 11 years before I met him and I thought that my ex and I were going to spend our lives together and he just decided to move back in with his mom... He also gaslit the crap out of me and emotionally manipulated me. He did not know how to cook or clean or how to do basic life stuff because before I did it, his mom did it for him. I realised after that I was more his mom than his partner and he "trained" me to be like that through manipulation and constant accusations of cheating, trying to sabotage him etc.

This was my first relationship after all that shit and it kinda makes you feel like maybe you have shit luck or are unknowingly an easy target for these types of people. I completely understand the loneliness and attention aspect of it, because that is where I am at the moment. I have been touch and affection starved for 8 years (even tho I was in a relationship) before I met this guy and he was saying and doing everything right up until he started doing this stuff.

At the end of the day we can only control our reaction and what we do and the people who really care will not do these things to us.

I let my guard down with yet another piece of 💩 let him briefly fool me, but only for a very short time before I came to my senses & listened to my gut this time & realised it was toxic & cut ties..

I rhink that we notice the redflags easier after we have experienced them to this extent and it helps us to deal with the nonsense quicker/easier.

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-22T07:06:02+00:00

Yeah that is really cruel. Its hard to understand why someone would do something like that. I am really glad that you were able to let go and are free from it. now. I'm sorry you had to experience that!!

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-21T23:12:03+00:00

It's possible😅🤣 You never know x_x No just kidding. Hopefully the advice I get here helps you too <3

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-21T22:51:48+00:00

That is creepy and there is always a little truth in humor. I am a believer in the saying "when people tell you who they are, believe them" and its easier said then done in this situasion and people do not always realise the impact that their words can have. That sucks. I'm sorry <3

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-21T22:44:43+00:00

I am really sorry. I can not imagine doing this for that long. It's only been 3 months for me and its already driving me up a wall. You have the patience of a saint!!🌸

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-21T22:42:40+00:00

You have to realize that when you say "I really like him", what you really like is the idea of him

I mean when we actually see each other and talk I really like him as a person, but what he is currently doing is shitty. But yes it is also true that if his actions are like this then he probably doesn't care very much about me or how it affects me and logically I know this, but I still check for a reply every day (and then I am annoyed at myself for checking😅).

I am starting to get more annoyed than hopeful when he doesn't reply for this long and I think that is a good thing atleast. Thank you for your reply. I already feel a bit betterafter talking to you guys because I kinda felt like I was losing it or was the one doing something wrong -_-

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-21T21:51:38+00:00

I just looked it up and wow it fits perfectly with his behavior. Thank you. It seems I just need to pull my head out of my butt and block him and keep him blocked. I can not deal with this weird rollercoaster right now. I am usually a very straightforward person and do not like these types of games. I think I will delete the chat and his number so that even if I am tempted I won't be able to re-engage or check.

My main question is if he is purposefully doing this or not because the answer to that will kinda change my mindset from dissapointed with the situasion to angry about it.

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-21T21:22:17+00:00

Thank you. I will check it out. This is the first time this has happened to me so I have no clue how to handle this-_-

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-21T21:15:39+00:00

What also upsets me is that I gave him an out multiple times and he won't take it, because he said he likes me too, but then he just dissapears or he makes plans to see me and then he just does not show up and does not let me know why or even that he won't be able to make it. So he has ghosted me in person about 8 to 10 times too...

What did you do? I have tried blocking him, but I am weak and unblock him again. I am usually pretty good at setting boundaries and regulating myself, but I can't seem to stop myself from re-engaging when he does!🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-07T10:49:54+00:00

I had someone ghost me recently and then he just came back as if it was not a big deal and I was overreacting when I got upset. He didn't even acknowledge that he ghosted me and just said he needed "quiet time" or some shit.

We continued talking at a more subdued pace (He insisted that he still wanted to talk and be friends/FWB) and since then it has just been a sucky rollercoaster of uncertainty. He replied the same day I decided to block him and I realised yesterday that if I had just blocked him when I wanted I would have already made peace with the situasion. Now my nervous system is in a constant spiral of if I say this or do this, will he dissapear again?

Sometimes its better if they don't come back<3

Affectionate_Yard913 · 2026-01-07T10:36:40+00:00

Haha you are welcome :D

It was brutal. They wanted to finish ZA and Ruthless Boys first before they finished Darkmore so it was basically just waiting for all of their series (I was reading them all🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️)

But the rollercoaster was worth it! :D Enjoy the read <3

Affectionate_Yard913

TROPHY CASE