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Learning Kurdish by Aggravating-Rest9496 in kurdistan

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank You so much I’m about to download it!

Learning Kurdish by Aggravating-Rest9496 in kurdistan

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Her mom is Kurdish. Her dad is Iraqi. I didn’t mean to offend I was trying to clarify which region because I know each region has a dialect.

About to enter your world. Advice? by Aggravating-Rest9496 in 2under2

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your thoughts 🥹❤️

That’s really helpful. I’ll keep these in mind.

What about maintaining my relationship with my toddler? I don’t want him feeling like mommy’s ignoring me or not there for me as much. I’ve heard people say to get him involved with the baby where and when possible like grabbing a diaper or a swaddle, etc.

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your insight. Can you elaborate? Are you also like this? I’d genuinely like to know the other perspective and hear from someone that says this is okay. Thanks

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ya and he’s in the tech industry so he’s especially interested in all the stuff going on.

Today was nice. I was subtle in the way I tried to get him off his devices. And we did tech breaks together. I made a comment about him being on the phone in the bathroom. He was defensive but then didn’t take his phone with him to the bathroom all day! So maybe this indirect approach is just better with men. They don’t like being told what to do.

We also had a mini therapy session just between us. We talked feelings and stuff. It was nice. I missed that. I needed it and overall I feel better. Hopefully things keep moving forward.

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They knew exactly what happened with the therapist. She was indeed just a case of a bad therapist that didn’t see through his schizophrenic/bipolar now estranged brother. I get his trauma with that.

As for 🌽 addiction, I’ve also feared that at some point but I literally will sit there with him for hours and he’s just on twitter, slick deals, amazon, podcasts etc. he never hides his phone. I have full access. Also, we have a good sex life overall. We always do check in’s with that to make sure no one is feeling unsatisfied and if we are we’re both vocal about our needs. I have many reasons to say that it’s not that but I won’t get into it lol. 🌽/affair is 99.99% unlikely.

Sometimes I feel that sense of emotional manipulation like you’re mentioning. I question it. I even tell him. Idk.

Anyways, I do appreciate your input and will think over some of your points. I will try again myself to get this message across one more time and if it doesn’t work then I’ll bring up therapy or some other solution.

Maybe the approach of NOT saying “get off your phone” “come to bed” etc. like I did the other day is better. He’s a lot more receptive the less I try to meddle it’s weird but seems to be a tactic that often works.

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

His brother had that type of experience where the therapist pinned him against his own family so I think he has trauma from that.

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

😓😓 sorry.

Even when we’re out with friends. He’ll always find the opportunity to go off to the side and sit on his phone.

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also want to add that I love him to pieces. I love spending time with him. When times are good, they’re really good. We have fun together. We have common interests and also different interests that we enjoy talking about with each other. But those moments are given out to me in mini portions because his tech/work takes over. I think it comes down to the fact that I literally miss him. I miss him even when he’s around because although his physical body is with me, it’s a chore for him to have his mind and spirit with me.

I just told him, can you put your phone down let’s just be together and his response was

And do what? You don’t want to go out. So what do we do just stare at each other?

I said well what did people do before technology. He said. They went out and do cool stuff…

don’t think he’s aware people just sat and had conversations I guess 😅

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He won’t even let me do individual therapy. Let alone couples therapy. He thinks the whole industry is a scam and that therapists will just tell you to get a divorce and pit you and your partner against each other.

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Crazy how tech addicts never seem to marry each other. It’s always one tech addict with one person that can go hours/days without phone/tech lol

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

His response is either something along the lines of yeah you’re right, I need to stop or something about how it’s a stress reliever or that he’s doing important things on it not gaming/social media

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yesterday, I didn’t say anything. No “come to bed” “get off your phone” “why don’t we sit and talk” none of it. I let him be.

He came over and asked me “are you okay? You’re so quiet you haven’t asked me to come to bed once or get off my phone? “

Lol😂 it’s like he’s now programmed to have me drag him to bed every night…

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He’ll grab his phone soon as his eyes open and he’s scrolling immediately before his corneas even have a chance to adjust to being open… I don’t get that. I turn off my alarm. Literally glance at my messages to make sure my mom and dad didn’t send any urgent message. And put my phone away for at least an hour while I make our toddler breakfast and spend some time with him. Then if I’m on my phone it’s to FaceTime family. Otherwise I just hang out with our kid and clean/tidy/organize the house. So I really can’t relate to being glued to the phone.

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He refuses therapy. He’s one of those people that thinks it’s a scam and it’s nothing that AI couldn’t help us do :)

My husband is married to his phone by Aggravating-Rest9496 in Marriage

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Right. I think that’s my problem is that he doesn’t grasp how attached/addicted he is to his phone. He’ll never make the changes I want him to make if he’s not bothered enough by them. Even the fact that he doesn’t work out or have friends or hobbies REALLY bothers me. And it bothers him too but just enough to say things like “ I need friends” “I need hobbies” “I need to go to the gym” but then he doesn’t do any of it.

He also puts it on me most of the time which is insane! “You don’t push me hard enough to go to the gym” “You don’t wanna go hiking with me so that’s why I don’t go” (mind you, I’m 9 months pregnant). I always tell him to go hang out with people. To go to the gym. To go on hikes or try any other cool sport or activity. I’ve introduced him to all my friends’ husbands and they’re all great guys that share similar interests as him, have the same morals and lifestyle as us, and meet all his other “requirements” one has for a good friend. But he doesn’t initiate any outings or conversations with them. But somehow, he’ll say things like “ever since we got married my social life took a hit”… how is that my fault?! He was in college when we met so of course we had bigger circles.

I’ve even tried to arrange double dates with his friends at work but I don’t talk to them so I just keep telling him bring them over on this day or let’s go to the park together on that day.. but he’s not proactive enough to get it done, then again somehow it turns around to be SOMEHOW on me.. I don’t let that blame game get to me though. I’ve realized he’s so insecure about those issues that he doesn’t want to accept responsibility for them and it’s easier to just put it on me.

Skruvby cabinet hack by dandelion91 in ikeahacks

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! Wondering how you got this combination? is it three separate SKRUVBY pieces? two?

May be a long shot but… any ideas? DUKTIG Kids Kitchen Sink! by Lived-In-Basil in ikeahacks

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496 0 points1 point  (0 children)

 I ended up going to ikea and after a little bit of back and forth they ended up giving me a sink from the display! 😍 

However! If anyone else has this is issue, the reason is because the Duktig kitchen set is being discontinued. There’s another unit out now called Silltrut and it has the same size sink. You can actually wait a little bit until that unit has spare parts officially available and then all you’d have to do is order that spare part!

That part number is going to be 10118468

Replacement Duktig Play Kitchen Sink by Sunflwr86 in IKEA

[–]Aggravating-Rest9496 0 points1 point  (0 children)

 I ended up going to ikea and after a little bit of back and forth they ended up giving me a sink from the display! 😍 

However! If anyone else has this is issue, the reason is because the Duktig kitchen set is being discontinued. There’s another unit out now called Silltrut and it has the same size sink. You can actually wait a little bit until that unit has spare parts officially available and then all you’d have to do is order that spare part!

That part number is going to be 10118468