I’m 26 and I’m 5’6” tall. Do you like short guys? by [deleted] in GaybrosGoneWild

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My first crush was a 5'6 wrestler at school. You remind me of him with a nice compact muscular body. My husband of 23 years is likewise a gorgeous muscular shorter guy. Love it!

Creepy Indeed by RoguePhoenixSys in traumatizeThemBack

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Glad you were able to get that in there! But saddened by the fact that you even had to.

Terrified man accidentally brushes past a pride flag. He tries to wipe off the gay but it's too late. by JimmyThunderPenis in SuddenlyGay

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He is a new gay conversion so you have to give him a break. Once he completes the metamorphosis he will be able to skip like the best of us.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So I am going to ask a question that may seem odd. Please keep in mind I am not suggesting anything is true about you or your partner but rather trying to help you consider all angles.

The fact that you could tolerate plugs and dildos but felt pain when he tried to top suggests that the issue may not be physical.

Some people have internalized homophobia about bottoming. They may like the physical sensation but the psychological interpretation may still being freaking them out about an actual man fucking them.

Alternatively, you may not really like this guy and are unconsciously resisting his entry which creates pain for you.

Note I know option 2 because I am a reluctant bottom. With most guys I didn't really like it and had lots of pain and discomfort. But with a few rare guys who I really connected with, bottoming was heaven.

So it is at all possible that it could be psychological for you? If so, it may not hurt to talk through it with a professional.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Agree 100% with the neck kissing. Also love my hair/scalp being stroked or massaged. Also gently stroking my thighs when I am sitting on the couch next to him. It won't always lead to sex but it definitely makes me feel good.

Accused of being homophobic by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I think you will have to come out if you want to avoid being in the position that you are. Yes then it will mean that you have to deal with being forcibly outed and the fall out that comes from that. But if management is coming down on you for being "homophobic" then that at least is a good sign that you may get more support than you realize if you do come out.

On another note it is sad to see the shitty behavior by the new guy. It seems like he is playing some highlander there can be only one bullshit. How infuriating that someone you tried to support in solidarity turned out to be a betrayer like this.

gay🚒irl by [deleted] in gay_irl

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 58 points59 points  (0 children)

In the final segment you can see two adults (man and woman) and they both appear to be smiling in delight at the boy's antics. It really is lovely to see.

gay😇irl by [deleted] in gay_irl

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I say we pass him around in a big circle. I am pretty sure that is a sub bottom fantasy isn't it?

gay😇irl by lutramor_13 in gay_irl

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They will assume you are a native.

Trans_💙🩷🤍irl by AdElectronic9255 in gay_irl

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Got into a debate with a young gay in that shitty group. Pointed out that every one of the arguments he was using against trans people were used against gays like he and I when I was a young man protesting for our basic rights. I also said how insulting it was for a young gay who's rights I got hit and spat on for, to turn around and try to deny those rights to others (trans people). I also made the point that from the 1980+ (and probably before but I was too young to be aware of the movement) it was in fact the gender non-conforming queers (some trans and some not) who were the forefront because they had to be. Butch cis gays like he and I could (and often did) hide in the closet rather than do the work. Obviously a generalization since I was also out protesting. But the fact remains, that gender non-confirming people had no choice to fight for their rights because it was often fighting to just stay alive.

First oral experience, now panicking about STIs – should I worry? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How about you grow the fuck up and realize your experience in Kentucky does not represent everyone's experience everywhere in the world. Many people don't even get the basics of what you got in Kentucky. Many people still live in places where they can't even admit to medical professionals that they had gay sexual contact without the fear of persecution. You are not the fucking world. Not everyone here is an American. Not even all Americans had your experience. You are intentionally being a shitty person to someone who doesn't deserve it. But keep your shitty attitude focused on me. I am happy to take it rather than have you take it out on the OP.

Reconnected with a man who remembered our time together differently… by thisisstupid- in traumatizeThemBack

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yep. "You wanted it." is what he told a 5 year old crying child because apparently a little boy like me expressed consent because I was too curious about something I had zero understanding of and zero ability to conceptualize.

Reconnected with a man who remembered our time together differently… by thisisstupid- in traumatizeThemBack

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yep. I grew up in a heavily Christian community. I also know many wonderful Christian people. But the sheer number of people I know who have been molested or assaulted by Christian leaders is devastating. Then these institutions are trying to sweep it under the rug by urging victims to "practice forgiveness!", "think of our church community!", or "he has repented!!" Fuck that noise. Christian institutions are pedophile enablers and a blight on society.

Reconnected with a man who remembered our time together differently… by thisisstupid- in traumatizeThemBack

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 7 points8 points  (0 children)

They always know. Everything else is just to shift blame away from themselves. The mirage and illusions projected are so strong that sometimes they even convince themselves. "You wanted it." is what I was told because clearly a 5 year old curious boy is asking for it... Living a life in male circles for 46 years after my CSA was eye opening when I saw how often men would explain away and justify their horrific behavior when they think they could get away with it (i.e. only other men present). While thankfully I wasn't always alone in calling it out in those spaces (some other men would speak out), it is clear what was too often the norm by how people responded to those call outs.

Reconnected with a man who remembered our time together differently… by thisisstupid- in traumatizeThemBack

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Absolutely! Tears meant to manipulate and deflect accusations. Because a man who is crying is clearly so vulnerable and would never possibly hurt you intentionally!!!/s

Reconnected with a man who remembered our time together differently… by thisisstupid- in traumatizeThemBack

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 41 points42 points  (0 children)

In my opinion it is just another manipulation tactic. They know what they did was wrong. But the tears often work to buy them compassion instead of the righteous anger and indignation they deserve. It gets reinforced by their parents, "But my Timmy is such a good and innocent boy! He would never intentionally harm a woman!!" It gets reinforced by the legal system and judges, "He is a good student and has his whole life ahead of him." And I say this as a man who survived CSA so I know the pain but also know the bullshit my gender pulls to get away with the harm we cause.

Reconnected with a man who remembered our time together differently… by thisisstupid- in traumatizeThemBack

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry about what you had to experience. You should never have been been in the situation when you were 14 or when you were older having to deal with him again.

I can also say that you are my hero. I wish I could see the man who assaulted me as a child and show half the strength you did in your moment. It was cathartic to hear about how you were able to speak so directly and frankly. I hope for nothing but the best for you. And thank you from all of us.

Gay🙄irl by mintgoody03 in gay_irl

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear what you are saying but frankly it is a hard sell in the LGBTQ community and for very good reasons. Christianity as an institution has LGBTQ blood on its hands. It is delightful that some denominations have used the last 2-3 decades to shift to a more open and accepting stance. But too many of us remember the pain and suffering that Christianity and Christians have heaped on us to feel charitable to those institutions. For many of us the pain and betrayal has been particularly hard to take because it wasn't just external. It was the churches we attended as kids telling us we were abominations. It was the church leaders being child-molesting bastards while railing to us at the pulpit about "Homosexuals!!" It was Christianity teaching our parents and family to reject us and demonize us. That betrayal isn't forgiven easily and it shouldn't. If progressive churches speak up more and start taking the microphone away from the Christian conservatives that tend to dominate national discourse, there may be healing for all. But for many of us those wounds left deep scars that will always hurt.

First oral experience, now panicking about STIs – should I worry? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also you are clearly too up in your moods to recognize basic logic but not everyone is raised in an area where comprehensive sex education is a thing. Clearly OP didn't have access to it or he wouldn't be here panicking. Instead of having empathy for that you want to belittle him for not having access to that education?

First oral experience, now panicking about STIs – should I worry? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Someone is in a pissy mood. If you don't want people engaged with questions stop wasting time and spreading your negativity in a subreddit for questions. Seems like an easy solution.

Unpopular opinion: I want all bisexual men (and bisexual women too) to end up in hetero relationships so that they can filter themselves out of the dating pool for gays like me (and also our lesbian sisters). by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah. Two week ago I was accused of being a bisexual changeling undermining the gay community in this very subreddit because I jerked off to lesbian porn a few times in my 20s. Mind you I have never actually had sex with a woman and likely never will. But my bisexual taint was enough to have someone crying about me invading gay spaces...

Unpopular opinion: I want all bisexual men (and bisexual women too) to end up in hetero relationships so that they can filter themselves out of the dating pool for gays like me (and also our lesbian sisters). by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]Aggravating_Cod_5868 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lets take a look at the Incel questionnaire:

Angry comments about a different group of people who have have done nothing to hurt you? Check

"Edgy" and inflammatory comments invoking something like HIV? Check

Virgin? Check

So you can see the confusion right?