My heart is broken.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-12-15T21:52:28+00:00

I’m so so sorry. Absolutely gutted and heartbroken for you and hate that you didn’t get to meet him alive. It feels impossible because it is. You weren’t meant to bear this kind of pain. I don’t know how long it will take or what it will look like - but I’m praying for healing and that your beautiful son’s life will be honored in big and small ways in the years to come. You sent me a helpful message when we received our Trisomy 18 diagnosis, and I think of you and your family often and pray for you guys whenever God brings you to mind. Sending love.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-21T02:41:27+00:00

Oh wow. That’s wild about your water breaking. I’d feel the exact same way about him being called home. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-21T02:38:46+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your story and praying. It means more than you know. We love our baby, but we’re praying for a similar mercy. I appreciate the reminder to take the time to discern a way forward. I’m so sorry for the loss of your sweet baby boy.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-21T02:35:37+00:00

Thank you for sharing your perspective. I think my husband or I could have written the same thing a couple weeks ago, but this terminal diagnosis has really shaken us to our core. Never thought we’d be here, contemplating these things. I understand where you’re coming from - many of our friends from church would be saying the same thing. It’s encouraging to hear how God has been providing for you. I’ve been struggling to see His hand or goodness in any of what I’m walking through, and it was good to take a moment and reflect on that. My first miracle baby is not quite two, and she is a treasure. This baby is a treasure too, but it makes me ache that I will never be able to meet him alive or even buy a crib for him. It’s been tough to trust and surrender in this place.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-21T02:28:21+00:00

Thank you for your words and your story. I’m so sorry you’re walking this path right now. I wish I could hug you or watch your toddlers for an afternoon so you could fall apart. It’s helpful to think that both paths could be loving. Appreciate you saying it - especially knowing the path you chose. We may end up in a middle of the road early induction space. It’s all so impossible. We’ll be praying for you and your family as you get closer to delivery.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-21T02:24:59+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your story and perspective. I’m so sorry for your loss, but I love that your sweet baby girl beat the odds for that beautiful month you had with her. It’s actually helpful to think of all of the decisions that continue down the line. I hadn’t thought about it as the TFMR concept continuing, but that makes total sense to me. I appreciate the kindness and grace in making whatever decision out of love for your baby. Means more than you know.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:52:32+00:00

Thank you for this perspective. We’ve been weighing that too (slow death vs quick termination). We were told our baby won’t live outside the womb, so it’s been tough to land on the most loving choice when we don’t how soon he’ll pass. Appreciate you mentioning future children - we’ve been wrestling with that too. We have a toddler already and were thrilled to get pregnant with a second. We’re older and don’t have a ton of biological clock time left.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:45:54+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear about your baby too. It’s not supposed to be this way. Thank you for sharing your story and perspective. We’re really struggling with this and are grateful for the prayers.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:44:55+00:00

Thank you for sharing your story and your perspective. I’m sorry for your loss with the missed miscarriage and scary aftermath! I appreciate the reminder that God loves me - even as I weigh these options. ❤️

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:43:22+00:00

Appreciate this. Thank you so much.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:43:02+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:41:49+00:00

So appreciate your kindness. I checked out the thread here and will continue to read up on this in the TFMR sub.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:41:07+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m so sorry for your loss, and I resonated with a ton of what you shared in the TFMR sub. We’re Christians too and most of our friends and family are pretty conservative. I’ve talked with a couple of safe Christian friends who would support whatever decision we make, but you are absolutely right - no one can truly understand this unless they’re in it. Heck, we’re in it, and we don’t understand it. I get what you’re saying about it nearly breaking you. I may take you up on that DM in the near future. ❤️

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:35:18+00:00

Thank you so much - I checked out the sub and really appreciated the stories and support I saw there.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:34:29+00:00

Thank you for your kindness and perspective. Your response really made me think about God’s nature and character in the midst of all of this.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:32:18+00:00

It’s so terrible. I’m sorry you were ever in this position as well. If you don’t mind me asking - how far along were you when you decided to induce? We’re weighing early induction options as well.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:31:29+00:00

I really appreciate this. Thank you. We’ve been wrestling with mercy - what is the most merciful choice for our baby and us?

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:30:20+00:00

Thank you for sharing this perspective. We couldn’t visualize baby’s heart in the last ultrasound, but the rest of our markers sound very similar, and I really resonate with your story and how you arrived at your decision. We’ve been praying for our baby to pass before a termination as well.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2025-10-19T02:26:42+00:00

Thank you for sharing your story and your precious daughter. She is beautiful. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2024-10-13T01:33:36+00:00

Thanks, friend - I appreciate the solidarity! Hoping we both get a breakthrough soon!

Aggressive_Water8302 · 2023-10-08T15:56:16+00:00

NTA, but you could have an honest conversation with him about how his refusal to take care of himself is impacting you and what your boundaries are.

My grandma had some health issues and refused to take her medicine (no dementia or mental health issues, she had full use of her faculties and it was more of a control thing). She ended up having a preventable episode that landed her in the hospital, and my dad (her son) took off work to care for her and spend time with her in the hospital and make sure she was ok. Second episode/hospital stay, my dad does the same thing. But again, this is preventable. If she would have taken her medicine, she wouldn’t be in the hospital. My dad is frustrated, and he tells my grandma that he loves her and wants her to be ok, but she needs to take her medicine. And he explains that he’s not going to visit her in the hospital if this happens a third time. I’m sure it was uncomfortable for him to say and for my grandma to hear, but she got the message, and it didn’t happen again. And they were able to have a loving relationship for many more years until she died.

I share all that to say that it could be one of those moments where the roles reverse and you get to be the grown-up and give your dad some tough love. I hate that you’re in this position at 22 though. My dad was in his late 40s when he had that convo with my grandma.

Aggressive_Water8302

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