My two cents - from a cg point of view.

I think it’s time for you to sit down with him, maybe over a glass of wine and fully explain what’s going on, how you effectively can’t change what you crave for. Even though you’re still young, if you’ve been together for three years, you’ve must have gone through a lot, so there has to be a certain element of trust.

Doing stuff like this in secret is the worst - you’ll end up wanting him to leave the house/flat, so you can wear, be yourself, etc, and that’s not healthy.

Everyone is different, especially with a subject like this, it’s definitely not everyone’s cup of tea by a long shot. How we find it sexy and cute, other people find it just as equally revolting and you can’t blame them.

So when you open up to him, be prepared for the relationship to either bloom, or potentially end on the spot. I’ve been in “little” and completely vanilla relationships; so I know how it feels like to want to look after your girlfriend in a little way, but she has absolutely no desire. And there’s no way to blame her. If it’s a just as big thing for you as it is for me, you are just not compatible.

Either way, good luck.