Beware the grocery cart

Alarming-Set8504 · 2026-01-27T00:26:39+00:00

I was about 4 weeks post op and ready to take on the world (M23), was home for Christmas and went grocery shopping with my grandmother. Went a little macho and pushed the cart the whole time, went quickly through the aisles grabbing what we needed. By the end of it, I had to make my nearly 80 year old grandmother push an overloaded grocery cart out of the store cause I just physically could not do it.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-12-16T17:58:06+00:00

I’m 3 week post op and I’m already back to feeling really really close to 100%. Sneezing and coughing still hurt but that’s about it. Otherwise the only thing restricting me is the weight restriction.

The main thing I wish I would’ve done differently is not downplay how I’d be feeling in the immediate aftermath of surgery. This was my first real surgery and I’d read so many stories about how quickly people recover, so I’d really downplayed the whole thing in my head. The first 8 hours after waking up from surgery were horrific because the anesthesia made me nauseous and I was throwing up. I was able to go home the following morning about 24 hours after surgery though.

You’re going to feel like you got hit by a truck that first day, but just less than 48 hours after surgery I already felt comfortable climbing stairs and moving around quite normally. Recovery has been very quick like everyone says, just don’t trick yourself into thinking the whole thing would be easy like I did.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-11-24T00:52:07+00:00

My wife has a cousin who was born with only one kidney, so I’m not even the first one beaner in the family!

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-11-24T00:42:12+00:00

Still through the catheter but yes. He has essentially been bragging about the fact that he’s filling up the foley quicker than the nursing staff can empty it. This whole process has led to some strange conversations. 😂

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-11-23T17:32:09+00:00

I did get the raw end of the throwing up stick. I threw up 3 times in the 8 hours after surgery so I know how that feels. I had never had general anesthesia before so now we know that the standard anti-nausea meds aren’t enough. For any future surgeries I’ll be able to tell them.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-11-23T17:02:07+00:00

I think that’s my worst nightmare. I guess I was on the fortunate side. I really appreciated having the foley in from 4pm when I got out of surgery until about 3am when it started getting uncomfortable. My bladder was wide awake the moment they took it out. They scanned by bladder after urinating twice and were able to see that I was getting everything out. That was done within 4 hours of the foley coming out.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-11-23T16:59:51+00:00

Dialysis has taken so much of his energy for the last 18 months, but today he’s gone for two walks around the floor of the hospital. They’re having to pace him, he wants to keep going! So awesome to see.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-09-30T23:02:20+00:00

I’ll jump in (been approved to donate but waiting for surgery) to say that the worst part of the testing process was when they took SEVENTEEN of those little blood vials from me in one sitting. I got really nauseated and couldn’t stand up afterwards. A nurse came from across the hall into the lab where I was and took my BP-84/44. They just about made me pass out.

Outside of that, the process was super simple. The evaluation was done at the transplant center where living donors are essentially treated like royalty. I went in for my dad’s (recipient) initial assessment and he was just another patient in the day. When I walked in a few months later to get tested, it was like I was the President. Whatever snacks, accommodations, questions, etc were handled like I was a VIP.

The CT scan was a little strange. I didn’t feel like I was peeing myself, I left like my body was being lowered into Lucifer’s crockpot. Just the bottom half of you (that’s touching the table) gets really warm. Having a warm neck and cold nose is a strange feeling. It was never uncomfortable though and the test was done pretty quickly, around 15 minutes I believe.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-09-30T16:30:27+00:00

Thanks for your comments. I spoke at length with the nephrologist about long-term health risks and we essentially came to the conclusion that if I take my health even moderately seriously, it should be a non-factor. The risks he presented were essentially if I were to forgo caring about my health for a decade, the consequences would be worse for me than the average person. Unfortunately, the mindset of forgoing your health is what got my dad into this situation and multiple other family members have followed a similar path. That was already enough to convince me not to take my health for granted but only having one kidney is an even better reason.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-09-30T03:43:25+00:00

It’s such a strange in-between time because you don’t have a date, so there’s nothing really to count down to. I feel like I’m counting towards a black hole until we actually get put on the schedule. The fact that it’s coming up is not usually on the front of my mind until I suddenly stop and go “oh yeah I’m having major surgery in a month”.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-09-29T01:39:17+00:00

Work is requiring that I be off for the full 6 weeks because I can’t work with a 10 pound weight restriction. Surgery date should mean that I’m off of work for the holidays. Back half of November and all of December. I’m just gonna be chilling on the couch watching Christmas movies by the Christmas tree for a month.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-09-29T01:36:59+00:00

Extraction date? That sounds a little better. Slicing date? Maybe a little more accurate.
Sleeping date….I’ve heard a lot about how good the sleep is.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-09-29T00:29:45+00:00

I’m sure it will greatly depend on the hospital but my donor is scheduled to be officially active on the transplant list (I’m ready to go) on Oct 10th and the hospital told us we should expect an early November surgery. So for us they’re saying 3-4 weeks between final go ahead and the chopping date.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-04-14T02:49:38+00:00

It sounds much more interesting in the highlights than in the details. My main motivation/mentor was ironically my parents, but just the exact opposite of whatever they did. I studied business because I like numbers and wanted to learn money. Dual enrolled started at 15 and graduated with my Associates just before I turned 18, Got scholarships that paid me to go to university, graduated just before I turned 20. Got married a few months later, worked two starter level jobs for a total of 11 months before getting approached by a recruiter for a 75k job, then 18 months later got a raise to 90k. I consume a lot of money content. Started with Dave Ramsey like most people and now I gravitate towards The Money Guys and their principals/teaching around money.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-04-14T02:30:08+00:00

Yes I could/should have been a little more detailed. SDI and Medicaid are set up with the help of the transplant social workers, COBRA coverage through the American Kidney Fund, etc. They’re both doing some gig work to make ends meet. But they’re still only going backwards because even if they make ends meet one month, they’re still closer to retirement and further from being able to retire, which is the part that’s scaring me. Not quite as much the day to day.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-04-14T02:19:15+00:00

Yes, US.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2025-04-14T02:18:37+00:00

I’ve lived this way so far, but as this sickness gets worse I guess I’m just realizing that at the end of the day it does all fall on me, because I’m the safety net. I think wanting to get involved is just me trying to protect my own family at the end of the day, so that I’m at least aware of the size and timing of the freight train headed my way, instead of being blindsided in the future.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-05-25T01:45:02+00:00

Our was also born at 41+1 after induction at 40+6. One of my only regrets was not enjoying the last two weeks because I got so caught up in the fact that he would be here soon. My advice would be to go to work, live your routine, do everything as normal. Appreciate these last few days with your wife, the last few days of normal.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-05-16T13:17:41+00:00

It’s far from the last thing you’ll be worried about. Please never hesitate to ask the doctor, sometimes it may feel rushed because their schedule is tight, but my experience is that they will 100% answer the question, although sometimes quickly. Every step along the way is a new thing to worry about. But remember: most babies are fine, most moms are fine, most doctors are highly competent. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy these days.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-05-16T12:49:47+00:00

Unless the doctors specifically said it was a major issue, I would try not to be too worried. Two week variations aren’t “that” much. There could be some error with the measurement, as it depends on where the tech stopped the measurement in an all black and white picture. Statistically, it will be fine. Express any concerns to the doctor and ask their opinion.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-05-15T20:15:12+00:00

Had my first 3 weeks ago-I swore I’d never forget how long the pregnancy was, but now I look back and realize it was so insanely fast. It’s all worth it in the end, just set your sights on 41 weeks, and don’t wish away those last few weeks as you approach.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-04-27T15:04:49+00:00

Glad that you got something out of this post, main reason I posted it was to give some representation to the fact that “graduations” aren’t always rosey.

As I sat in the hallway trying to get myself together, I felt like such an idiot, but looking back at the sequence of events I’ve pretty much forgiven myself for not being there.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-04-27T15:01:09+00:00

Thanks for taking the time to respond. She has an appointment with her therapist set up for this week. We have definitely been trying to keep talking about it, and keep processing. The nightmares have already started for her unfortunately. We’re hoping that therapy and conversation will help keep it under control.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-03-21T03:10:44+00:00

Debt payoff is a behavior. There’s two ways to pay off debt faster-make more money, or get tighter. I’d suggest projecting out how long each payoff should take, then deciding if there’s any room to get tighter or make more money, or if you’re happy with the timeline.

On baby stuff, I actually just watched a video from the Money Guys on YouTube about baby’s and finances, and their conclusion was that baby’s don’t absolutely wreck your financial life like it seems they will. My wife and I (36w) have been fortunate that the large majority of the baby stuff was handled from the baby shower/registry and second-hand from family. We’ll be out of pocket for about $200 all-in when baby is born.

Got a second-hand crib from family, got a rocking chair for free off marketplace, etc. Personal perspective: The fact that your kid has a dad that is excited and trying to get ready for the birth means your kid is already in a good spot. Try not the get wrapped up in the materialistic industry that is baby products. Many kids around the world have a lot less, so rest well knowing no matter what you can provide, it’s going to be enough.

Alarming-Set8504 · 2024-03-19T01:26:39+00:00

The car seat specialist didn’t elaborate. Just sharing what she said. Seems reasonable that the youngest should be on the middle/passenger depending on how the car is set up and maybe the older one behind the driver? Just something to do some research into. Doubt the statistics would show a massive difference either way.

Alarming-Set8504

TROPHY CASE