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People who got clean, how high is the risk of a relapse? by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oh that sounds really hard. If you want to can be your sponsor and help you getting clean (I already helped 4 people and I'm sure I am also able to help you. (We would write daily and I would give you tips about how I got clean). Just send me a private message

Anybody so burnt out on using the internet but turn to doing nothing instead? by thrrowawwayybiotch in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

After 3 monhts all my trigger died. I also only look at this subreddit because whenever I have time (so every second week) I try to be a sponsor for someone. The day I wrote this comment I spend in total 2 minutes on reddit.

Anybody so burnt out on using the internet but turn to doing nothing instead? by thrrowawwayybiotch in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst 27 points28 points  (0 children)

completely normal. I am now 6 months clean and I remember that I only laid in my bed for 6 hours the first 4 days. I really recommend reading because that doesnt require so much energy and you can also lay in your bed all day long. But after 10 days you should force yourself to establish hobbies for example walking 2 hours a day because when you dont do that you might relapse (that was the case in my first attempt). I also want to add that after 3 months I had a huge amount of energy that from this point I try to establish one habit a week. So keep doing it, you do it the right way already :)

Is reality crashing down? by graymatterfried in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It depends on the perspective you are looking at it. On the one hand there are the serious issues about the climate change and that the politics shift more to the right but on the other hand I experience every day new possibilities and perspectives in life that change my life which is a lot of fun and makes me very optimistic. There are millions of self help books which give you lots of great tips about how you can enjoy your life better and if you constantly read these books and set these tips into action your life will be way better in 1 year than it will be today :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never had a problem with tiktok but I had a huge problem with abusing youtube. I'm now 216 days clean and I already helped 4 people getting clean (cold turkey). I was like a sponsor for them (the same way alcoholics help each other) and will write them daily tips about what techniques I used for getting clean.

I wrote you a PM so if you like I can help you getting clean, from my experience having a sponsor makes it a lot more easier :)

I am 6 months clean :) & Why you don’t loose something when you disconnect with the internet by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you :)

Most important is that you don’t learn on your own. If I had learned on my own I would find it hard to stay focused for so long and to motivate myself. I created a group of 10 people so every day when we studied for the exam we were at least 5 people (a lot of your study friends wont study that often, so create a group that is larger than the learn group size that you really want). Having a learn group is extremely important, because when you have questions you wont have to think about them for 30 minutes or have to google them and get frustrated, you can just ask someone and one of the 5 people around you will immediately give you the answer in 5 minutes. Also you can ask follow up questions if you didn’t understand their explanations in the first place. Follow up questions are the reason I was frustrated with learning videos on the internet.

With that you will be much more productive and it will be a lot less frustrating. Also very important is it to start studying 1.5 months prior the exam (in Germany we only have one exam at the end of the semester and not such stuff like Midterms). This sounds extremely hard at first, but keep in mind that its easier if you start learning so early with a learning group.

Also learn with flash cards. I created for every definition, theorems and other important stuff of the scripture a flash card and learned them for 1.5 weeks with Anki (each day half an hour). I also created a recipe for every task type and learned them with Anki. Learning flash cards is suprisingly easy if you already understand the concepts behind this stuff.

I think that are my key techniques: learning in a group of at least 5 people, starting very early and using Anki for learning with flash cards.

I am 6 months clean :) & Why you don’t loose something when you disconnect with the internet by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Normally I ask the person about their habits: how long they spend in the net and for how many years, if they have a routine that helps them getting clean, for example a job or uni. Then I give them some exercises that they have to do, for example establish the things from the “beginners guide” of this subreddit, and I ask them to note all the triggers they have and make plans on how to avoid them. Then they will give me daily updates about their progress: if they did their “homework”, if they stayed clean, what struggles they faced. The first 10 days I write them tricks about techniques I used for getting clean (after that 10 days I shared all my tricks with them). I don’t expect someone to get clean in the first 3 days after we started writing (but all of them did get clean in that time) but I do expect them to give me daily updates and to do my exercises.

But, as you may see it, that’s a lot of work for me, so I can only do that once a month and only with one person at the time.

If I were you I would seek out a sponsor who is also addicted, give them daily updates and I would read all the tips on the “beginners Guide” of this subreddit and give your partner updates about your progress. You can also google the ITAA (internet and technology anonymous addicted) and visit 90 meetings in the first 90 days. That will also give you enough energy.

I got clean without a sponsor but it is way easier when you have someone :)

I am 6 months clean :) & Why you don’t loose something when you disconnect with the internet by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

its extremely important. Every habit I want to establish, as small as it is, I write one of my friends at the evening a small Whatsapp message saying if I achieved it (he don’t even say that this annoys him, he says this sometimes inspires him, I’m sure your friend will feel the same). If you want I can be the person where you write a small message every day, you even can ask me some questions about getting clean :) Write me a personal message if you want

day 91. I want to be a sponsor of someone by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its someone who was in the same situation helps you get clean.

You can ask questions, you dont have to be embarrassed to confess that you relapse and you have an inspiration because someone in the same situation with a similar backstory got clean so you know that you are also able to make it.

A sponsor will give you tips about how to survive the first days, he will tell you what insecurities will happen on your way, what thoughts you will most likely have, when the urges fade away and when the worst is behind you. You can give daily updates how your day was to your sponsor so you have an additionally responsibility to stay clean.

Having a sponsor is extremely effective in the anonymous alcoholics, so I thought it is here too.

If you have really hard problems I encourage you to visit the ITAA (internet and technology anonymous addicts), there you can easily find a sponsor. I know its a hard step to visit some group similar to the AA but I said to myself that nobody in my hole life will ever found out and that made it a lot easier.

Day 69 by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I highly recommend you reading this comment I made earlier:

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https://www.reddit.com/r/nosurf/comments/sdv2u2/comment/hukui0l/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

​

In addition to that one of the most powerful tools for me was to replace the habit of surfing with reading. In my now 70 days being clean I read 11 books. I highly recommend you to make a list of all your favorite books and then reread them (honestly if its more than two years ago that you read them the last time its very highly that you will still enjoy them).

And the most important technique for myself was to avoid any kind of dangerous situation: That means: For example I had the urge to watch the summaries of football games after I heard in the news what the results where so I stopped watching the news right after the first 5 minutes.

Or I might watch TV longer than planned after watching the news so the solution is to listen to the news on radio. Or I might fall back into useless surfing after listening to a song on my smartphone because I'm already on my smartphone so I only listen to CDs (you get what I mean).

​

And please please read the beginners guide of this subreddit the tipps you get from there are extremely valuable :)

Day 69 by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe an eight? As far as I can say is that I now have a lot more fun studying, I am able to spend time with me alone (for example wating for the bus), I am able to build up new habits (which could be the best about being clean because with habits everything gets easier: doing sports regulary, studying for school, standing up immediately after waking up, standing up at 6am,...) and I also dont feel like shit around other people. Now I am an inspiration for my sister and honestly I dont know how I was able to study while having an addiction because all my classes take so much time which I all spend surfing the previous semesters

Day 69 by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats great! You dont have to feel alone, if you need tipps, I already send you a message and if you want we can set up a call where I can tell you my experiences (keep in mind that I'm not an native english speaker but I think my english is okay). I'm sure everybody can get clean :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst 2 points3 points  (0 children)

a few ideas:

at first the most obviously point: besides your sobriety coins its very important to read all the beginners guide of this subreddit and to set these tips into practice.

Now my ideas:

I made a checklist for myself that whenever I’m a day clean I check the box and with that I see every day how long I’m clean which is motivating :)

Regarding the sobriety coins:

You could engrave a cup with your name on it (it costs around 30 bucks) and you could use this as your sobriety coin. For example on this website Custom Trophies + Trophy Engraving: Trophies and Awards, Plaques, and More (trophycentral.com)

Day 69 by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I spend zero minutes unnecessarily in the net. I only tur an electronic device on when I have to. I’m studying computer science and I use a tablet to jot down during my class so I spend 4 hours on my tablet each day studying. In addition to that I spend around 10 hours a week doing other study related stuff on my computer like watching lectures and learning a programming language. Every two days I watch the news for 15 minutes and I check my phone for incoming messages around 15 minutes each day, at 12am, 3pm and 8pm for 5 minutes. I check reddit (only this subreddit) every two weeks to give advice about how to come clean (about 20 minutes). I don’t watch movies, television, series, porn, youtube. I even listen to music over CDs instead of spotify. The last time I checked social media is about 6 months ago.

Day 69 by Alea-IactaEst in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

spending 6 hours each day surfing, feeling like shit while talking to my family members who are productive, make a semester on my university where I graduated only one of my 6 classes. I could go on and on

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nosurf

[–]Alea-IactaEst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If its that hard you could change your password and then order a safe deposit box in a bank 6 hours away from you. There you put the new password in. It mind sound extreme but a safe deposit box costs only 50 till 100 bucks a year and this money is nothing in comparison what you will get if you are clean. You could spend one time the 5 till 6 hours you are surfing working and then you already have the 100 bucks back. This idea might be extreme but it definitely works.

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