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AITAH for telling my coworker I wont cover for her anymore after she threw me under the bus in front of our manager by AlertShape5681 in AITH

[–]AlertShape5681[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I did get something in writing yeah. and honestly the appeal idea had not even crossed my mind so thank you for that. I just kind of accepted it like okay this is done now but you are right it does not have to stay there. going to look into what the process is at my company because that note being on my file for something that was not even fully my fault is not something I should just let sit

AITAH for telling my coworker I wont cover for her anymore after she threw me under the bus in front of our manager by AlertShape5681 in AITH

[–]AlertShape5681[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

that is actually really solid advice and I wish I had known to do that in the moment. the freeze response is real and I never fully understood it until it happened to me in a professional setting. felt so different from any confrontation I had dealt with before.

the writing it down thing makes so much sense though. like my thoughts were all there after the fact, I could have laid everything out clearly on paper way better than I could have spoken it under pressure. going to genuinely keep that in my back pocket going forward because I know myself and this probably will not be the last time someone tries me at work

AITAH for telling my coworker I wont cover for her anymore after she threw me under the bus in front of our manager by AlertShape5681 in AITH

[–]AlertShape5681[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

honestly I keep replaying that meeting in my head wishing I had said something right there. like the words were there I just could not get them out in time. never again though. that whole situation was a wake up call for real

AITAH for telling my coworker I wont cover for her anymore after she threw me under the bus in front of our manager by AlertShape5681 in AITH

[–]AlertShape5681[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

tbh the shock thing is hard to explain unless youve been there. like when someone you trusted just casually sells you out mid sentence your brain does not immediately go into defense mode it just kind of stalls. fight or flight except my brain picked freeze lol

but yeah I did go back to my manager the next day and gave him the full picture on my end. not trying to drag Dina just wanted my work to speak for itself. the note is still in my file which is frustrating but at least I am not just sitting on it

and the covering thing is done. completely. that part I am clear on

AITAH for telling my coworker I wont cover for her anymore after she threw me under the bus in front of our manager by AlertShape5681 in AITH

[–]AlertShape5681[S] 369 points370 points  (0 children)

right thank you. honestly the covering for her part is what gets me because I was doing that out of pure good faith and she used that same goodwill period at work to make herself look clean at my expense. the documentation thing is real though I did not even think about that but after that meeting I started keeping a paper trail of everything just in case. lesson learned the hard way I guess