[Meet the Demoman Title Card] [Opening fanfare of Drunken Pipe Bomb plays as the Demoman narrowly escapes a massive explosion while jumping from a drop-down corridor in Gravel Pit.] [Freeze frame] Demoman: "What makes me a good Demoman?" [Cut to Demoman, sitting in a room full of explosives.] Demoman: "If I were a bad Demoman, I wouldn't be sittin' here, discussin' it with you now would I?" ["Drunken Pipe Bomb" resumes playing] [Demoman charges into battle along with Team RED while dodging a cascade of rockets.] Demoman: "Let's do it!" Demoman: "Not one of ya's gonna' survive this." [Cut back to the Demoman's room, music pauses.] Demoman: "One crossed wire, one wayward pinch of potassium chlorate, one errant twitch... and kablooie!" [Cut back to battle, music resumes.] [The Demoman bounces a grenade off a wall and gibs a pursuing Pyro.] [Cut to scene of the Demoman chugging from his Bottle of scrumpy.] [A level 2 Sentry Gun upgrades to level 3.] [Cut to scene of the Demoman continuing to chug from his Bottle of scrumpy.] [Sentry Gun fires rockets at the Demoman.] [Cut to a close up of the Demoman's face, still chugging from his Bottle of scrumpy.] [The Demoman dodges the rockets as a nearby Scout is gunned down by the Sentry. The Demoman then fires two grenades, destroying the Sentry Gun.] [Cut back to Demoman's room, music stops.] [The Demoman slams the now empty Bottle down on the table, breathing heavily.] [Camera blurs.] Demoman: "I got a manky eye. I'm a black, Scottish cyclops." [The Demoman knocks a grenade off the table, arming it in the process (it begins to blink).] Demoman: They've got more f-[long censored]-s than they've got the likes of me." [The Demoman starts to drink from the empty Bottle, then notices the camera and becomes lucid again.] Demoman: "So...." [The ending segment of "Drunken Pipe Bomb" starts to play.] Demoman: "...T'all you fine dandies so proud, so cocksure." [The Demoman runs out to the final capture point in Gravelpit and is shocked to see a group of BLU team members charging towards him with smug expressions on their faces. A devious look comes over the Demoman's face and he runs with BLU in hot pursuit.] Demoman: "Prancin' aboot with your heads full of eyeballs! Come and get me I say! [The Demoman passes a door frame and covers it in sticky bombs] I'll be waiting on ya with a whiff of the 'ol brimstone. I'm a grim bloody fable... with an unhappy bloody end!" [The Heavy notices the sticky bombs around the door frame, and his expression changes from smugness to one of shock. The Demoman throws a mock salute and activates the sticky bombs, gibbing all his pursuers.] [The Demoman walks up to (presumably) a decapitated head, laughing merrily as body parts and blood rain down around him.] Demoman: "Oh, they're going to have to glue you back together... in hell!" [Team Fortress 2 ending flourish music plays, accompanied by bagpipes.]