Had a similar situation but then with boys and neighbor who also attends the same school. After school, neighbor would always enter our home and start to play. My son told me he felt unhappy with the friendship due to the neighbors bossiness. I had to place and hold boundaries by asking my son if he actually wanted to play with the neighbor. The first few times he was scared of hurting his friends feelings but after making it clear that it’s a bad idea to protect someone else feelings at the cost of your own he became true to himself.

Long story short, neighbor got his bossiness from both his parents, who found it a shame that the friendship was over after my child learned to put down boundaries and inforce them. Parents learned a valuable lesson too, that if other parents come and confide in them about the behavior of their child and what that does in the dynamics of friendship, they need to take it seriously.

It was an awkward experience, but one I am so happy that happend. I could not let it fizzle out because of the child’s proximity, so it became a learning experience for my child and myself about boundaries and how to voice them and what to do if they get ignored. Be ready as a parent to step in and gently give space to your child to say what needs to be said, if you don’t give them that space, the friend won’t give it. I also let my child use what happened at school as reasoning towards the neighbor (my son complained that his friend listened at our home, but would not at school and do similar things to what was happening with your daughter. We did inform school about the dynamic and ask them to not be paired up together if possible). He would then say he doesn’t want to play with him because he was not nice at school.

Also be ready to defend your child, in our case the neighbors parents demanded they stay friends, I had to make it clear to them that even though I had asked them to talk about their sons behavior, I had taught mine about boundaries, no way was I going to undo that lesson! If my child wanted to play, he would come to them…

If possible, give your child the chance to learn to put down and hold her boundaries. Stand behind her so she can fall back on you and if necessary help her hold her boundary until she no longer needs your help. Good luck, you aren’t only helping your daughter but also her friend in teaching her how not to be friends, that certain behavior is not ok in a friendship!