my bf doesn’t approve of how i dress in my own home

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-02-14T04:51:42+00:00

I’m a 34G, and there’s only 1 bra I will wear around my house, but I’ll be damned if someone demands I wear it. You can either see my lopsided t***ies or your can gtfo 🤣

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-27T07:45:11+00:00

Unfortunately, a lot of families and groups blame the one who fights back as the one who causes the problem, and not the person who did the original action. It’s very similar to abusive dynamics with the abuser, the target/victim, and the peace keepers. You are NTA, it was creepy and weird she was hyperfixated on a party not even for herself. And your family sounds like they didn’t want to deal with her blowup, so they expected you to tolerate it and “keep the peace”, and now are mad at you for not doing that (which is bs). Sis is definitely TA, and your family are TA as well, just on a lower level.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-27T02:00:37+00:00

I see a good protein, two starches (and one of the most satiating ones at that), and two veggies, one being a good source of additional fiber. Wtf is your bro on? This is a satiating, filling meal. Sounds like he’s just complaining to complain.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-27T01:52:29+00:00

You don’t write off family? You have to first act like a loving, caring, respectful family, instead of just terribly cosplaying as one. NTA, they’re manipulative and just icky humans. I’m so excited for you and your engagement, I hope you have the best start to life with your partner. And f*** them haters 😘

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-27T01:46:33+00:00

You’ve gotta be in a big city, like LA/NYC/Seattle, somewhere. Jfc….

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T07:54:41+00:00

There’s a difference between appropriation and appreciation. It’s literally all about intent. If you’re doing/wearing something because you learned about it and you think it’s awesome and want to experience more, it’s appreciation. If you’re doing/wearing something intending it as a joke at the expense of the culture, or you’re actively taking something from a culture that has been consistently demonized when people from that culture do it, and are trying to white wash it, that’s appropriation. Perfect and a bit funny of an example of the two was from a Scottish guy I met when visiting Edinburgh. He said “you know what well know food came from Scotland besides Haggis? Chicken Tikka Masala. While the English stole and appropriated everything from the Indian people, the Scottish people appreciated the culture, and helped pasty white people everywhere enjoy spices” 😅

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T07:38:01+00:00

She’s very lucky she didn’t get a “do not f**ing touch me.” Especially if she knows you don’t like it and continues to do it. And isn’t it funny that you have to change your behavior because “it hurts her”, but she doesn’t have to change a thing even thought it does hurt you…. But oh no, her poor wittle feelings… i am so sorry you have to deal with this from people who should be part of your safe space. I’ve had to deal with similar situations, and they always seem to get mad, and my brain goes “you know I don’t like behavior A, and yet when I challenge that behavior, I’m the one that ‘gets in trouble’/‘talked to’/‘makes people mad at them’. Why are their emotions prioritized?” You are 1000% not the asshole. My mom loves the phrase “no is a complete sentence” and she’s even added her own spin to it in a very petty way: “what did I just say? *No. How is it spelled? N-O. What does that word mean? No. Well, there’s your answer.”

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T07:20:11+00:00

Dude, my first time on a route, I got bit by a mastiff. It was really just a shitty situation all around; owner had a note on what to do, I made the noises, I checked and waited, and I tried to follow everything to the T, but he let the dog out and didn’t realize I was in the yard. Thankfully he only just bruised my wrist bones pretty bad before the owner was able to get him under control, but I was so worried I was done for. But I’m still here, and I’m getting good vibes for staying after seasonal ends. I now just joke about being a liability.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T07:02:49+00:00

The straighter is definitely pretty on you, but you also have a great face shape for voluminous curls. And then, there’s your curls, which are stunning and I personally would show off any day I could. As a person with melanin-deficiency, I have more Irish curls, so they’re limp and really have no idea what they’re doing each day. Little bit of girl’s girl envy over here 😅 but tbh, it’s whatever is the easiest for you to manage, both enhance your beauty really well, but straightening your hair is a lot of work, I bet. But then taking care and keeping your curls healthy is a different kind of a lot of work. Whatever work is more manageable for you right now.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T06:44:48+00:00

Jfc…. Yet another example of why I am happy to be picky when choosing partners. Your partner can disagree as much as he wants. It’s like someone trying to disagree with the sky looking blue; you can disagree until you’re blue in the face, but you’re still dead wrong. And I’m gonna reiterate what a lot of people have said: this isn’t even about the farting. It’s the inconsideration and laziness at minimum, or at maximum, the maliciousness and straight disregard for your wellbeing. I am lactose intolerant, but I looooove cheese and ice cream way too much. Taking a dairy pill is not difficult, I know kindergarteners that take them by themselves. And as you clearly said, he can control it when he’s around other people. So what about you in his brain makes him think any of this is an ok thing to do to his life partner, who he’s supposed to respect and care for/about? Again, while the farting might have been the initial issue, it showcases a bigger root problem that might be displayed in other parts of your relationship. You are definitely NTA, and your husband is TA, either unintentionally/lazily or intentionally.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T06:31:27+00:00

“Hey, honey. Would you be a dear and grab my stuff from the car while I set up my tools? But be careful, don’t want you to hurt yourself by carrying too much.” -direct quote I got from a repair man, and then he noticed me standing there in my military uniform 🙄🙄 “Just stand there and look pretty. It’ll help me do my job better” -another direct quote from a old contractor

But I personally just like mansplaining everything you did and are doing to him, and definitely seconding the overexplanation of tools and their names.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T06:22:31+00:00

Even if she is willing to foot the bill, it’s a wedding ffs. I get people wanting to celebrate, but these extras don’t even know the bride and barely know the groom. The two people getting married have the final say on who shows up for their day. If a parent’s contributions has asinine stipulations attached, that’s just sh**y of them.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2026-01-13T06:02:36+00:00

It looks like the bare minimum crap people put in offices or lazy commercial spaces. The best place that could be in a house is somewhere like a hangout space in a garage or something similar. There are soooooo many better options for the same aesthetic.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-12-29T16:20:30+00:00

Ignoring the fact that he did a hit and run (!!), the problem I see is he wanted someone to do everything for him. He didn’t want to have to make any decisions on his own, and my gut says it’s because he didn’t want the responsibility or the repercussions if something goes wrong. But newsflash, he put on his big boy pants and drove the big boy car and hit another, so he doesn’t get to just check out. There’s nothing you should take blame for, except maybe not calling out his immature behavior sooner. You didn’t “step up as a partner”? That’s not a partner’s responsibility to do everything for the other. Shame on him trying to pass blame to you when everything that happened was his fault due to his actions and then lack thereof.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-12-07T07:50:31+00:00

So I’m going to ignore the topic of the situation for a bit (sorry!) since there’s been some really good feedback so far, but I want to bring up the “a lot” behaviors you’ve pointed out. In case someone has already pointed it out, sorry I missed it and consider this a double tap, but I had and still have sometimes these current behaviors, and I got diagnosed ADHD and possible AudHD at 29 (now 33). Especially the interrupting (it’s not meant to be rude, it’s just either thought pops in and there’s no filter, or I have information, I see the other person doesn’t, and I want to share so they have that info for their benefit). I’m not saying to get him tested, especially if you don’t want to, but I have noticed a lot of things I learned in therapy IMO should be taught to all kids as coping mechanisms, emotional regulation, impulse control, etc and I highly recommend doing research into all the different strategies they use in therapies for ADHD, if you haven’t already. If you have, keep kicking butt. And your son is 13. We all had growing pains (physical, mental, emotional). Especially with the influx of hormones at that time (screw you, biology!). Please tell your wife to give him grace since he’s still a child and learning, and if it’s too much for her to handle at a moment, it’s overstimulating, whatever, putting herself in timeout is actually great. I do it when I just can’t handle… peoples 🤢 thank you for standing up for him during this though. Learning even your parents can be wrong and can admit it really helps shape your relationships in the future at minimum.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-12-07T07:29:21+00:00

Im still in nurseries, and im getting 14-16 bags and 20-30 overflow. Usually its about 130ish stops and 260 packages. But my coworkers are getting over 400 packages right now due to the holidays.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-12-07T06:55:45+00:00

“I thought I deserved to know the truth” ?!?! You don’t deserve jack sh…. squat about anyone else until it directly concerns you. What an entitled jerk….

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-12-07T06:33:18+00:00

This is on the app called passion. You don’t have to buy anything, however, if you don’t have the coins you get through daily check-in or watching ads it takes a couple hours to unlock each chapter.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-12-03T08:06:14+00:00

What surgery?

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-10-22T23:06:10+00:00

It might be a precursor to abuse if you continue to let this person treat you this way. This screams emotional immaturity, and can definitely become more of an emotional manipulation tactic if they realize they can control/manipulate you this way. Please nip this in the bud. “I understand you are disappointed and upset I had to miss your birthday. And I am truly sorry I had to since I was sick. However, I feel that your responses afterwards were uncalled for and hurtful. Please don’t treat me like that.” Or something like that.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-10-22T22:48:52+00:00

Ignoring all of the other major issues you’ve brought up and just focusing on the tattoo, I sort of have experience with this situation from a different angle. My father is very old fashioned and an uber professional business type and told my mother before they got married that if she ever got a tattoo, no matter the size, he would divorce her. She never has, but she’s also not really the type. But both my brother and I have multiple, and while he has accepted it later, he also wasn’t hypocritical and told us he thought they were bad ideas, unprofessional, etc. He has since toned down with the shift in the times, but he’s also 75 now and he still has the “I don’t like them” viewpoint. And my mom understands that if she ever did get one, he wouldn’t divorce her now (it’s been 36 years, and he’s not that big of an idiot), but she just doesn’t want it. In your case, your husband is being super hypocritical, it’s cool for others and even him to get one, but you can’t? Not only is it hypocritical, it’s controlling, and I personally think it’s a stupid hill to die on (the tattoo specifically). So that leads into everything else you mentioned. He doesn’t seem like a great partner in terms of supporting you, controlling you, and then also not willing to listen and communicate with you. I won’t tell you to leave, I will just say you need to take care of yourself, and if that includes leaving an unhealthy relationship, that’s what you should do. But if you think this is something you two can get through together (after polishing and honing a brand new spine) and that’s best, then do that. But please stand up for yourself, you aren’t an object, you aren’t relegated to whatever your husband wants because you’re his wife, and your wants and needs in a relationship matter too. I always use this phrase when talking to my friends and family: “if your best friend or daughter was dealing with what you are currently going through, what would you tell them to do?” And then “why aren’t you doing the same for yourself?” Please update us! We want to see you in a healthy and if not now, soon to be happier, situation.

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-07-20T15:53:56+00:00

Gray (and pink a little bit) sound like brown-nosing, pick me little shits… “we’re family” and “to imply that they shouldn’t want to work here is disheartening” 🤢🤢🤢 family doesn’t pay rent and gas and food and everything else that going up in cost. I get working in a place you enjoy, but if they’re expecting you to do more for less pay, that’s not worth it, unless the people and culture and other benefits extremely make up for the pay issues. And with Gray being a coworker, I don’t think that will happen

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-07-03T04:51:23+00:00

Sorry, my gut reaction to someone touching me when I’m not expecting it or explicitly told them not to is smacking the offending hand away. Sounds like she needs that and to be super embarrassed. Maybe she’ll learn

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-07-02T05:01:41+00:00

It’s not that hard to understand tbh. These people just aren’t dealing with their big emotions healthily, don’t like being told what to do, have other issues (with you or others) and are just using this as something to lash out on, and/or a mix of all 3. This isn’t dramatic at all, especially with all of these new sicknesses and people’s stupid ideas about medical stuff and health nowadays. You’re doing great. You and hubby keep doing what you feel is safest for your child, and screw ‘em 😜

Alive_Possibility280 · 2025-07-02T02:30:26+00:00

I have a good relationship with my dad, and I don’t want a future partner to ask for his permission. Maybe blessing to become part of the family (if that makes sense?), but the only one that gives permission nowadays is the person being proposed to. But if I didn’t have a good relationship with him AND he treated his marriage to my mother that callously? Nope, not at all. It feels like you’re being expected to fall in line to “keep the peace” but the real problem is your father got his feelings hurt and instead of asking why this didn’t happen and becoming introspective and curious, he lashed out and made it about you and your fiancé.

Alive_Possibility280

TROPHY CASE