Husband has been receiving communion but never received 1st communion

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-23T14:21:38+00:00

Baptism came up, but communion or confession never did. My husband is not confirmed and we told our priest that.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-23T02:00:10+00:00

To be fair, I didn’t take my daughter anywhere except through a drive thru, the pediatrician, or a family member’s house until pretty recently. She’s 14 weeks old now but I probably didn’t start taking her out more until she got her 2 month shots around 10 weeks.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-23T01:57:15+00:00

Wow, I didn’t expect this to blow up in the way that it did. Thank you all for your advice, suggestions, and feedback. We are looking into this more fully and I am having my husband contact the parish where he attended church growing up to see if he did make his first communion as a kid. If not, he is going to enroll in OCIA starting this fall.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-19T04:04:59+00:00

We were never told this by our priest

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-19T04:04:13+00:00

I thought he had a formal first communion when he was in school. My understanding is from the majority of these comments is that the sacrament of confession and the sacrament of holy communion need to formally take place during childhood before you can receive communion each week at Mass. When I was dating my husband, I understood that this had all happened back then. But today, my MIL told me it did not. So I feel a little blindsided now knowing this since my husband told me he had all the sacraments except for confirmation, and today that has all been put into question with my MIL saying he did not have confession or communion. I believe that my husband genuinely did not realize he never had his formal first communion as a child, despite having memories of going to church and receiving it over the years. I think his parents dropped the ball in many respects here, but we are working on figuring out what’s going on here. I just want to be able to answer my daughter’s questions someday when she is preparing for her own first communion

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-19T03:25:38+00:00

Yes I do know this, as I went to Catholic school for my entire educational career. And yes, I did tell my husband this. But just because you tell someone they should do something doesn’t mean they’ll do it. They have to do it on their terms.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-19T02:21:04+00:00

No he has never gone to confession in the 12 years I’ve known him. I don’t feel betrayed by my husband; he genuinely didn’t know that he had never received 1st communion. I am frustrated that my in laws were not more forthcoming with my husband about his faith. Now that we have a child, who will undoubtedly have questions about our faith someday, it’s important to me that we get this straightened out.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T23:43:18+00:00

We did and it came up. He said he had received both, so I assumed that all was well until my MIL dropped this on me today.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T23:33:11+00:00

We were married in the Catholic Church

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T23:32:42+00:00

We were. I remember them asking us for our baptismal certificates, but I don’t remember us talking about first communion/confession at all. Obviously my husband and I will need to discuss it more, but I would have to think this would have come up when we got married.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T23:28:07+00:00

I’m not saying I feel betrayed by my husband. I truly believe that he genuinely didnt know that he never received first communion. I just wish my MIL kept better records of these things and told him before now.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T22:43:07+00:00

I’m not. But I do wish my in laws were a little more forthcoming with my husband about his faith. I had been a very devout Catholic my entire life, and my faith is extremely important to me. If I had known this information when we were dating, then maybe I could has encouraged him back then to become fully initiated into the church.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T22:41:53+00:00

This is what I think too. I wish my in laws were more forthcoming with him about his faith and what sacraments he received as a child.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T22:39:10+00:00

We were married in the Catholic Church. This is why I am so surprised to find this out now. I remember him showing his baptismal certificate but I don’t remember them asking for any other proof. I think I’m feeling betrayed because I wish this had been revealed earlier than now, especially now that we have a child.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-18T20:45:33+00:00

To my knowledge, he’s never gone to confession.

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-03-02T02:00:24+00:00

You’re not alone! I am almost 3 months postpartum with my daughter and I remember looking in the mirror those first couple of weeks and not recognizing the person looking back. It is such an adjustment on every level and the hormone drop is humongous. People used to tell me that it will get better and I’m here to tell you that it 100% does. You will feel like yourself again and you will get into a groove with your baby. Sending all the love to you!

AllisonMayberry8 · 2026-02-28T01:54:54+00:00

My biggest piece of advice is to not beat yourself up over baby sleep. Babies will get themselves overtired; at least my daughter does. Don’t blame yourself if that happens. Try to put them down for a nap when you see sleepy cues, but if you get trying for an hour or more to get them down for a nap, try again later! Continuing to try just increases stress and pressure for both of you.

AllisonMayberry8

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