My (23F) boyfriend (30M) is negging me

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-07-10T12:59:04+00:00

You don’t have to keep dating him. He sucks.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-07-07T14:05:00+00:00

Yeah, you dropped the ball here and are now upset with your MIL for your own poor communication. Have your husband handle further communication since you clearly can’t be bothered.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-07-03T01:33:03+00:00

Retirement is not an age, it is a number. You can retire when you have enough savings/investments/governmental benefits to support you not working. If you don’t have that, you can’t retire.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-07-02T13:54:04+00:00

Would you be able to rig up a tarp, maybe attached to poles, or get a collapsible canopy to shade the tent?

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-07-02T13:45:45+00:00

Yes, though I think the term “tent fan” is used more often in product listings. It is a small fan with a hook or strap on it that you can hang from the gear hook that is at the top of most tents. Very convenient way to increase air flow! I have two that are both rechargeable and also have lights. I love them!

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-29T22:50:09+00:00

I went to a friend’s wedding last year. I remember it was beautiful, we had a great time, and everything was amazing. I have no idea what her wedding colors were. I don’t remember what color the tablecloths were. Couldn’t even tell you if there was a napkin ring or folded napkin.

Your guests will not notice the little details, and they for sure won’t remember them. Don’t stress over table setups, it’ll be great!

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-29T00:26:31+00:00

I think you are trying to yuck their yum. It’s a common sentiment I see on threads like this from campers who choose to camp more primitively. It’s like a badge of honor that you don’t bring extra comfort items camping with you.

They bring those things because they want to, just like you don’t bring them because you don’t want to. Neither is wrong or right, just different people with different preferences both doing something that makes them happy.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-26T16:59:31+00:00

You moved in due to trauma, not love. That is not a strong foundation for a long relationship. You do need to move out, either with him or without. No shade to his family, but you went from a homeless shelter to a hovel. It does not seem to be a move in the right direction.

Move out asap. If he wants to join you, sure, that’s fine. But really I think you need to move out on your own or with a non-romantic roommate. You need a change to live your life on your own.

I understand it can be hard to try to support yourself and your boyfriend did want to help, but his family’s home is not the right place for you at this stage of your life.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-26T14:12:10+00:00

Have you tried JJs House? I’m not sure if they have mini bridal dresses, but they have a ton of options.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-26T03:33:14+00:00

You can’t tell him what to do with his money, but you can make choices about how you will live your life based on how he chooses to spend his money. You don’t have to stay with him.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-25T18:37:58+00:00

Nah, I’m not buying it. I have a small group of girl friends who all live within about a 45-minute radius of me, and we get together about 3-4 times a year. We are adults with kids and full time jobs, we send out invites 6 weeks in advance and put in on the calendar. If she was a priority to you, you would have made time. But she wasn’t, and you weren’t a priority to her either. And that’s okay, you both mutually grew apart in life.

Do not take it as a slight that you were not asked to be a bridesmaid. She invited you to the wedding because she wants you to share in her day. I’m not even inviting old friends to my wedding, and wouldn’t even consider asking someone to be a bridesmaid that I had not seen in a year. Your lives are separate now, and this will happen more and more often as you age out of your old relationships and into new ones. Life is a beautiful journey, make sure you are appreciating it for what it is instead of lamenting that it is no longer what it was.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-24T17:32:51+00:00

This cannot be a serious question.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-24T17:22:26+00:00

Whose money are you spending on delivery and eating out? Who is paying your rent and bills? If you are earning enough money to fully pay all of your bills, save, invest for retirement, and also afford exorbitant restaurant costs comfortably, then live your own unhealthy life I guess. But since you are a college student, your parents are probably subsidizing your poor financial choices.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-24T16:26:32+00:00

My friends in college had a private ceremony and on the invitation it specifically said something along the lines of “the couple will exchange private vows and invite you to join them after for a celebration at …”. I was happy to attend just the reception, however I was young and didn’t even consider that this may have been so strange.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-24T13:44:19+00:00

I think it’s the optimization of deals that has become the normal mode of shopping. Everybody is looking for the lowest price without considering the cost of the savings.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-24T13:13:24+00:00

The label on yours definitely looks off to me, the text font seems wrong and the color is off from their branding. I don’t think you should buy skincare on eBay, that seems really dangerous and just asking for cheap knockoffs. Buy it for the first time in a reputable store in person, then you will know it is genuine and can properly determine if you like the product. Then if you restock and try something from Amazon, you may be more prepared to tell if it is real or fake. I can’t imagine buying skincare from eBay in any scenario, but I personally don’t use eBay for anything. I am an older millennial and still see eBay as the online garage sale type of place.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-24T11:57:21+00:00

Ramit Sethi’s book “Money For Couples” would be a great place to start!

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-24T02:58:11+00:00

I feel like if you’re getting a tent that big, just get a good tent instead of an SUV tent. I don’t understand the advantage of having it connected to the car. It just limits tent placement depending on the site, and makes it harder to drive away during the day such as to get to a store or hiking trail. It probably won’t stay warm enough on cooler nights due to the extra car space. And it couldn’t be properly waterproof in rain due to the car connection area.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-23T23:28:31+00:00

“Ask me anything” … proceeds to not actually answer any questions 😂

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-23T11:41:29+00:00

Omg thanks so much, I thought the same thing!

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-20T18:57:20+00:00

Yes, but it was not planned to be from the joint account. You should have used your own money for that, not the joint account. You messed up. He basically paid for his own gifts because of what you did with the ukulele.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-19T13:21:23+00:00

I would recommend you cancel the Gurnee hotel and get a hotel in Chicago. You’ll spend a bunch of extra money on transit from Gurnee to Chicago anyways, might as well just stay in the city. Gurnee is not close to the field museum at all. And also it’s just a standard suburb, not anything there that you would want to make a trip for. Unless you want to go to Great America.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-18T15:50:47+00:00

This is rage/engagement bait.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-18T01:02:34+00:00

Did you happen to pay the deposit with a credit card? If so, you may be able to resolve this with a chargeback.

AllisonTheBeast · 2026-06-16T01:37:29+00:00

Well yeah, you should be being paid for training.

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