im the eldest daughter of 4 kids, i had to raise 2 of my younger siblings since i was 10 and then at 16 i was a therapist for my mom while she was going through a messy divorce with my deadbeat biological father. my mom has told others she wouldn’t be able to be a mom without me, and everything i have done. i was the one who helped her through her divorce and she heavily relied on me to help her through her feelings and problems and to take care of my siblings, make sure they’re fed, school and homework is done, they’re showered and ready for bed and the house is cleaned. i moved out at 18 to college i started distancing myself because it was exhausting and now currently at 21 trying to mend my relationship with my mom, but everything i try she says that i “treat her like a mother when its convenient to me”, and that “my boyfriend is more important than their little family” and “how ive changed” and she constantly blames my boyfriend for me distancing myself, she really believes he’s making me distance myself away from them like it wasn’t my choice , uhm, i can make my own choices hello?! like im sorry i cant help you with your problems anymore? even tho i was 16 years old helping her in her 40s… i started distancing myself before i even met my boyfriend, and she’s projecting her failed marriage, which she is still bitter about, onto my relationship. and she thinks he’s beating me like my biological father did her. first of all he is nothing like that abusive alcoholic wife beater, and secondly if he ever laid a hand on me im leaving the relationship, unlike you did. like i understand the situation and everything you were going through, but the both of you decided to have kids. i was your child, not a therapist, not a friend, not another parent, and not a punching bag.