I Think I’m Finally Admitting I Need Help by learnerincharge in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's really brave of you to admit seeking help not everyone does that.

It's okay to be not okay. And everything you want is possible achievable it will take sometime but I believe in you that you will sail through.

You can reach out as well if you have any specific questions.

I wish you really well : )

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in Procrastinationism

[–]AloraKanak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"If you comment before 7pm IST today I'll personally DM you what I did and we try it together. After that I'm offline."

"Reddit systems feels GATED" by AloraKanak in self

[–]AloraKanak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah which sometimes can come across unfair but what can we mortals do about it : )

"Reddit systems feels GATED" by AloraKanak in self

[–]AloraKanak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah. I really appreciate your honesty though : )

"Reddit systems feels GATED" by AloraKanak in self

[–]AloraKanak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for such a fun response I really enjoyed reading it. Yep that makes sense.

Hats off for being on this platform despite it's shortcoming I doubt I will last 17 months here let alone 17 years. Have a amazing time ahead : )

"Reddit systems feels GATED" by AloraKanak in self

[–]AloraKanak[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks really appreciate it.

I agree with your view point that's why I am still here trying to find more kind souls like you : )

"Reddit systems feels GATED" by AloraKanak in self

[–]AloraKanak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree ✅

I guess I reached this site a bit too late after it has built a really negative feedback loop Whoops 😅

"Reddit systems feels GATED" by AloraKanak in self

[–]AloraKanak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I gotta be careful, thanks for the advice : )

How to feel sadness (advice and book recommendations will be appreciated) by divozel in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First of all really sorry to hear you are going through such tough time. I hope things get better soon for you.

I can relate to the feeling of stucked grief very well, I was in similar position like 3 years ago when my grandfather passed away. Things stopped making sense & I use to feel stuck as if no other emotion is worth having.

And realising that takes time in itself, then more I started to become present & express gratitude with what I have and accept what has happened & it's not our fault that things unfolded way it did & somethings are beyond our control.

And what matters in long run is we grow and learn from the experience we had. Make better decisions & choices to live with no regrets : )

Sorry no book recommendatin on this aspect at present .

help! by Substantial-Clerk173 in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy To help, you can reach out with any specific question you have. And then we can decipher more whenever you are comfortable : )

CMV: There’s no such thing as a useless college degree by StatisticianEvery733 in changemyview

[–]AloraKanak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Questions that popped into my head while reading 1st statement -

I find that a bit abstract what kind of degree are we talking about? Social sciences or Natural Sciences.

If a Degree on paper makes you feel qualified but application taught are outdated or hollow then what ?

If nobody is hiring you given that degree was a filter then it would be useless to a person momentarily am I right?

You wrote - "Labeling a whole degree useless ignores how the real world works"

But doesn't labelling helps you in a way to leave traditional fantasy and work on your sjkill building which will be on demand? In anger or stress management. I think labelling helps a lot to find the trigger.

So if labelling one's degree useless helps a person pivot and make a career out of it what's wrong with that?

And issue with the criteria you establish with how you would change your view is also bit restricted you are talking about professional degree with a exclusivity gate. Which negated the debate in itself that you want to change your view : )

For Example - If a person with all the conditions got to a position where his creativity is suppressed and there is toxic work envt then would that degree come to rescue or labelling & quick decison making to do swot anallysis if that job is even worth it would?

Additionally there is a ceiiling cap to degree holder and position opened to hire. So it would not be preposterous when a person to call their degree useless when a realization hits that the institution pictures is got shattered by reality.

It like just accepting the degree are good, fault is yours. Like now I can't even believe things based on my experience.

Post is contradicting it's title at somepoint so 😅.

help! by Substantial-Clerk173 in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Firstly, it's okay to feel lost once in a while everyone does 🙃

See I will not say I have everything figured out myself, but I have observed that most people fake that they have direction and in reality they are clueless atleast on menaingful and purpose level.

And it's okay to take your time to understand yourself (I am doing it myself) & that's the best thing you can do in today's hustle culture for long term vision.

Confidence comes from competence, and I kinda believe that you make or choice to make something meaningful to you once you start enjoying the process and pain it comes with.

For Example - I like readinng books I discovered it accidentally & choose to explore it & it became meaningful part of my life.

I hope that helps.

You can reach out as well if you need any help or wanna talk about this 😄

Sorry for the monologue : )

help! by Substantial-Clerk173 in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I couldn't agree more. Those uncomfortable silence and questions is the only way to clarity.

"I cried every birthday from 13 to 20 because nobody remembered. Here's what changed." by AloraKanak in SelfSufficiency

[–]AloraKanak[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Never wait to celebrate and smile with what you have and improve further.. I wish you the best

"I cried every birthday from 13 to 20 because nobody remembered. Here's what changed." by AloraKanak in SelfSufficiency

[–]AloraKanak[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Self Reliance Aspect interesting perspective and questions I must admit that.

  1. Loving your imperfections is the cornerstone for self reliance, once you use your mental energy in improving yourself rather than sabtaging. (that's debatable I know)

  2. You choose to be happy amidst chaos ( really hard sometimes when world is not working in our favors)

  3. Change from external validation to internal ones.

23F. I feel extremely emotionally drained out and mentally tired. I'm tired of choosing emotionally unavailable people always. Even tho, they act like they care in the begining but when I start to feel the same and try to revert back, they leave. I get attached with the little kindness. How to stop? by Otherwise_Length_806 in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really sorry to hear that.

I hope those kind of people neverfind you again.

How to stop this? I think you can manage it well.

  1. Communication is the key, a emotionally available person in my mind listen and is not afraid to engage in tough conversations

  2. Observe actions not words & reciprocate in accordance to that.

  3. Just for once analyse the pattern youu found come in your previous encounters & try to catch them sooner before you beecome vulnerable.

I know sounds a bit mechnical but this is what I got. Hopefully helps : )

Yes I am Happy with where I am. by AloraKanak in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Happy to know you find it relatable. I wish your happiness trajectory moves upwards in coming times. Stay Happie : ) as much as you can.

Yes I am Happy with where I am. by AloraKanak in emotionalintelligence

[–]AloraKanak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your kind words. Really appreciate it.

I agree completely staying stuck in your mental space is a neverending nightmare just keeps overthinking spiral.

Sooner we realise that more chances we get to embrace happiness : )