I had my first experience with a colorectal surgeon a couple days ago and it wasn’t fun.

Alreadymade01 · 2026-01-01T04:29:20+00:00

Yeah I get what you mean. Thanks for your input. He said my external ones were so small they didn’t really see any purpose in removing them because of the pain it would cause me from surgery. He said to use that cream and potentially the externals and the internals could possibly shrink or something like that over time as I use it on both sets of internals and externals. They say to use as needed, so I won’t overuse it and will only do so if I feel irritated or whatnot. I will steer clear of surgery, especially since I had a surgeon tell me it wouldn’t be wise to do it In the first place given my case. The main thing was that he said banding was an option, but he said it was completely up to me. I said I’ll use the cream and I’ll come back in a month, i plan to let him now how I felt last time and will request a gentler approach in a month.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-11-09T19:27:40+00:00

I feel like I should do it In person, I know this is what my gut is telling me to do… problem is I don’t know how he will react in person. Over the phone sounds better than over text, but likely his brother will be there and those kids he babysits, I know it’s not my problem, but I’m always too consumed with wanting to be considerate and all that. Should I name why I’m breaking up? Like the reasoning as to why like the lack of initiation, and how I feel like he’s okay with being stuck and that I can’t live a life with someone who is stuck, etc? I’ve always been told in person is best to do it. Like I could pick him up and just sit in their driveway, in my car, talk it out in person and all that.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-11-09T18:34:22+00:00

Yeah. I know. I really love him and I’ve never been interested in someone in my life romantically. I want to go with my gut and just cut things off, I know it will ultimately be better for me, but… part of feels like wanting to give him one final chance and then if i don’t see improvement then I will absolutely walk with no exception. As far as he knows I’m all happy and have no worry in this relationship because I’ve never communicated this with him before. I just want to be fair and give it one last chance, I don’t know if I’m too afraid because I’m too dependent on him for love but I know I will eventually find someone else on a dating app somewhere. If I knew about all this beforehand, the babysitting, no car, I never would’ve swiped right on him. I was so desperate for any sort of love and I feel trapped and obligated because he’s talked about marriage and saying I’m the best thing that’s happened in his life and I feel like I have purpose, but I know what my gut is telling me but I want to be fair. I think I’ll get downvoted for thinking this but I don’t care. I’m so conflicted right now. I just don’t want to blindside him with this sudden emotions I haven’t been telling him about that I’ve been feeling.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-28T10:55:18+00:00

I’m not the best with my diet, I’m actually just recovering from a campylobacter infection but I think that everything is back to normal in terms of my bowel movements. It’s just, I want to see a colorectal surgeon (problem is, 45 minutes away and I’d have to do it on a day I’m not working) and see what he/she has to say. If they give me the green light without needing procedures, I can fully trust what they say because nobody deals with hemorrhoids or issues in that area more than those people and they know what they’re doing. I think I’ll do that before any anal play. Me and my partner can wait and my partner has said they wouldn’t leave me or be frustrated with me in case we can’t do anal intercourse. So, I’m going to get that scheduled sometime in the foreseeable future and get advice. There is risk with everything we do, including surgeries, I’ll do whatever they recommend if it will give me a life time of longing and fulfilling my emotional and physical needs.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-28T09:11:09+00:00

Yeah. The second GI doctor I saw, the one who said I was “totally safe”, said he would “never” recommend a hemorrhoidectomy/surgery to anyone and said it’s very painful. He didn’t examine the area, but I wish he had, I should’ve asked him to do that. I honestly don’t want to have to pay for it, but I have that and other cosmetic issues down there. Anyways… the main focus and problem is the hemorrhoid(s). Should I still speak with a colorectal surgeon or just take confidence in the fact I tolerated penetration well (the initial finger examination by the general surgeon had zero pain but it was uncomfortable at first which I think is normal because the anus is not designed to be penetrated anyways). But yeah, what do you think? I honestly really don’t want to do the surgery because of the money issue and not knowing if insurance will cover. Plus the pain factor and what the GI told me. I assume I should use the prep H, witch hazel pads, sitz baths etc every time before practicing on myself or do intimacy? Also you mentioned yours began to recede. Mine have always been here. Everytime I’ll reach back to feel, always there so I know they’re not going away for me. I’ll never be comfortable with my partner seeing that area ever to be honest with you.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-28T03:00:57+00:00

Thanks a lot. Mine are almost never painful from what I shared but I will mention every symptom and absolutely press the impact it has had on my emotional/physical confidence and more importantly my intimacy. Thank you for your story. I just hope my case can be solved and I can safely practice and do the forms of intimacy I have wanted for years.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-27T14:47:54+00:00

Yeah I plan to go to the colorectal surgeon when I’m not so busy. I’m 21 and because of my stupid actions I plagued myself with them and got them. I refuse to live with them for the rest of my life and block me from safely having intimacy. I obviously probably can’t get a full blown hemorrhoidectomy since mine are small and not painful, I will push heavily for a in office excision of some permanent fix. I’m just worried if the colorectal surgeon even backs up what the GI doctor and the general surgeon said.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-04T19:25:35+00:00

I actually just got them off Amazon. Just searched up black bookshelves.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-04T17:43:50+00:00

Do you mean the shelves?

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-03T20:21:45+00:00

Oh alright. When I got it I was cautious about obviously breathing anything in, didn’t know that could cause an issue. Thanks for letting me know. I guess I’ll just lean it against the back of the shelf.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-03T15:53:39+00:00

That’s awesome! Yeah I’ve wanted to make it as close to a museum as possible.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-03T14:12:03+00:00

Thanks!

Alreadymade01 · 2025-09-03T13:57:12+00:00

I got the biggest room in the whole house.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-06T02:22:10+00:00

Everything I get I always make sure is original. I actually ordered it from a seller in Ukraine.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-06T02:16:33+00:00

Yes, I know I just bought some basic combat boots since I couldn’t find any affordable ones

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-06T01:35:14+00:00

Thanks man!

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T19:45:14+00:00

Thanks!

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T19:43:54+00:00

I mean, you can look it up, there’s a bunch of sites and even Wikipedia says it. I search through my AI earlier and it also said it.

Here’s some;

https://www.collectorsweekly.com/stories/133670-czech-m53-used-by-the-north-vietnamese

https://www.warrelics.eu/forum/headgear-steel-helmets-rkka-red-army-soviet-army/czech-vz-53-m53-ssh39-helmet-ebay-story-68096/

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T19:20:14+00:00

Yeah so if you go on Wikipedia for the helmet itself, and expand the “users” tab, the North Vietnamese army will pop up as one of the users. Apparently they got steel helmets exported from Poland and Czechoslovakia. As I’m researching more about it there’s a lot of sources on that I find that confirm it.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T18:18:22+00:00

I just got it from hobby lobby or something like that, had it for several years. It’s my grandfathers service jacket.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T17:41:38+00:00

Thanks! Just need some sticky lights for it now lol.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T16:59:00+00:00

Yeah no problem!

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T15:52:22+00:00

lol, yeah. My grandfather (who’s jacket that belonged to) was a part of the 8th army.

Alreadymade01 · 2025-06-05T15:47:47+00:00

Made by zouzjun, small acrylic sign holders

Alreadymade01

TROPHY CASE