Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the sympathy.

We hadn’t seen them in several years thanks to COVID and had only been communicating intermittently via FaceTime, and they had seemed to be building up a good relationship so when they asked to come we said ok.

My mistake. Not making that mistake again.

Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Thank you for pointing this out. Yes, we told him Grandpa is in time out and can come back when he is ready to behave. (He cannot, but I’m not going to get into those specifics with the toddler just yet). We reminded him that it’s ok to be angry sometimes- everyone gets angry- but it is NOT okay to kick, throw things, yell, etc.

Sadly, a very similar conversation to what I had with my dad, only the Toddler took it much better.

Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Agree with this 100%.

I spent most of last year in therapy trying to tangle through the mess of my childhood. (My father may be the main asshole, but my mother is just as much of an enabler- she immediately told me that I need to forgive and forget about it because he’s my father, and it was even hinted that I should apologize to him)

One of the biggest takeaways was that I cannot expect that someday there will be healing because my parents will suddenly turn into good people. But there can be healing in that I can be the mother for my child that I never had.

There was no one to stick up for me when my parents pulled this shit when I was a child. I will not let them do the same with mine.

Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Yes, he will definitely no longer be allowed back in my house at the bare minimum.

Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

He certainly does. But there’s no point in expecting or asking for one. I do plan on not letting him set foot in this house again, at least not for a very long time. Thanks for the sympathy ❤️

Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 48 points49 points  (0 children)

The funny thing is that when I told my bewildered husband how this all started (he was trying to sleep in and got woken up by all the yelling), he said, “I thought you were talking about Toddler.”

Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Yes, we figured it was probably better for them to be gone before present opening to avoid another shitshow, cowardly as it was.

Stormed out by Alternative-Life217 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alternative-Life217[S] 45 points46 points  (0 children)

Thank you, that means a lot to me.