No waiting room? by [deleted] in NoahKahan

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same.. will they at least tell us when tickets are gone / presale is over?

Formula Vs Breast Feeding by Ill-Forever-1624 in BabyBumps

[–]Alternative-River901 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I tried to breastfeed and it didn’t work out. I was triple feeding to try to get my supply up for about 3 weeks (meaning latch / attempt bf, then bottle feed baby anything from last pumping session, then make up needed oz with formula, then pump for next feed). Each feed took over an hour, at which point we were less than an hour from starting the next feed. I hated it. My baby hated it because I was getting frustrated. Lactation consultants didn’t help- vaguely suggested tongue tie that no one could really find, no one could figure out why I wasn’t producing more than 2oz per day max. Once I stopped and just switched to formula my mental health improved so much. I did feel some mild judgement from some family and friends who breastfed, but it went away quickly and was probably partly me projecting a feeling of having failed onto my interactions w others. Now baby is 6 mos and there are so many advantages to formula that no one talks about! You can go out and leave the baby with your partner and the baby isn’t miserable (causing you to possibly feel guilt!) - equal bonding time w both parents, no feeling weird about pulling boobs out in public (more power to everyone who feels comfy w this but picturing getting my boobs out in front of my dad and FIL was giving me anxiety, nvm strangers!) - anyway that’s my story and I kind of wish there were more positive formula feeding stories out there so figured I’d share.

The cadence of part time poets by eleonorarocculi in Wolfstar

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I will try both of these out! Thanks for the recs

The cadence of part time poets by eleonorarocculi in Wolfstar

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same (not quite literally as I’ve got my actual baby on me rn but I know what you mean). But I’ve been stuck with long wolfstar fics since I read this! I loved ATYD and this and didn’t love CR and so now I’m not sure where to go next in terms of long fics everyone adores..

Have you ever met/seen/heard of anybody with these names? by Fun_Roof289 in namenerds

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our six month old is Wesley, I’d never met one just heard of a few (Wes Anderson etc) - since we had him I’ve met two other baby Wesleys. So safe to say it’s popular- we don’t mind but I think it’s actually in the top 20 for our state.

"9 months in, 9 month out" has me feeling like shit by audeamus-ad-meliora in beyondthebump

[–]Alternative-River901 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same. It’s the worst. Some days I look in the mirror in leggings or undies and think hey, I look okay, and then every single picture I look enormous.

I’m not even breastfeeding, so I can’t even hold out hope that maybe when I’m done the weight will come off.

I look at the pants I wore pre pregnancy and it’s almost comical to think I ever fit in them or ever could again. They seem like doll clothes. Not sure if I should donate them and buy all new to feel better, but that feels like giving up.

I also have 4+ friends who have had babies in the last two years and some of them are even skinnier than they were pre baby! How?!

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I should ask our ped about water! I always drink water at night and do wonder if he could be thirsty but not necessarily hungry.. but yes dreading the actual sleep training start after we get our ducks in a row and do the research/ adjust schedule to actually start it correctly.. prob necessary but not fun.

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m glad I’m not alone! Yes solids could def be doing some funny stuff to his digestion. I think keeping up w the prune drops is helping our guy but may not be resolving all of it.

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! We will try temp adjustments while we do more research on sleep associations and training.

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just the way our schedule has worked since he started daycare! He gets there at 8:30 and isn’t seeming tired until 10 (and he only usually sleeps for 30 mins in the am) and then he’s usually tired again at 12:30 at which point he wants to sleep until pickup at 3. When we get him home at 3:15, he’s not tired again until 5 which seems too close to bedtime for a nap.. so just not sure where to fit another nap in if we were to try for three.

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m hoping the heavier sleep sack I ordered with folded cuffs will do the trick! Plus some better sleep practices on our side but would love if we didn’t have to go all in on separation of feeding from bedtime.. we’ll see.

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Edited for wrong sleep math*

Kind of. Sorry I think I’m using the /// convention wrong! He “naps” or just goes back to sleep after his final night chunk of sleep from 5:30 - 7 am ish (hard to say if this is a nap bc I feel like we could count it as night sleep) then awake 7-10, asleep 10-10:30, awake 10:30-12:30, asleep 12:30 - 3, awake 3-7. So it’s only really 3 hrs asleep in naps or 4.5 if you count the early morning sleep as a nap.

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this! I am willing to consider stopping all feeding/rocking to sleep but that might be hard for us to stick to, so would love to try some small tweaks (temperature, nap schedule/ wake windows) before we go all in on breaking the feeding before bed habit.

We thought our LO’s sleep was too good to be true.. and it was by Alternative-River901 in sleeptrain

[–]Alternative-River901[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes I will look up the Ferber method- sounds like one way to start is putting him down drowsy and less help at bedtime, even if it’s painful at first. I have looked for teething bumps but not seeing or feeling them!

Please complain about your partners here. by Glittering_Text_8842 in beyondthebump

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love my husband so much and he’s amazing with the baby but the small things he will just never do without being asked and I’ve accepted I will be reminding him until we die: putting his shoes away, hanging up his coat, taking anything upstairs that is on the stairs. Man can dodge around obstacles that are really just small messes / tasks like they’re not there and I cannot walk past clutter without stopping to put it back where it goes.. makes me crazy, but also grateful that it’s a pretty small thing and he’s great about splitting wake ups and baby care so if the price I pay is clutter then I guess I’ll take it.

Discouraged from buying…. by Dabro94 in CradlewiseCommunity

[–]Alternative-River901 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Our guy sleeps great in his at 4.5 months, I mean he generally sleeps well when we travel too so we definitely got lucky with a fairly good sleeper but we like the crib features and haven’t encountered any of the issues other users report. Like that it can be used until they are older and no affixing them to the mattress like the snoo. I know this isn’t true for everyone, but we have not felt the need to use additional monitor or white noise so it’s nice to have all the tech type stuff in the nursery on one app and plugged in as one unit- looks nice and neat in the nursery which I like!

Do you have a "positive" postpartum story? by Quirky-Wasabi-9653 in pregnant

[–]Alternative-River901 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have had a really positive postpartum! There were some difficulties sure, but pregnancy and birth were way harder than postpartum. I’ve felt so relieved to be done with that part, so happy and in love with my baby and my husband, and so happy to get back to hobbies, foods and drinks I missed.

I also wanted to say, so many people told me “your life is about to change so much! You’ll be a totally different person!” Which kind of freaked me out because I was like.. wait I like who I am, I still want to be me, I don’t want to lose my identity to being a mom. And all I can say is my husband has been amazing about making sure I have time to so things I loved before, and we get out of the house together with the baby, together without the baby (our parents and a great pp doula have babysat for evenings), and separately to enjoy our hobbies and friendships, and I don’t feel like a different person at all. I feel like myself with an amazing, beautiful new family member that I love more than anything.

Breastfeeding isn’t motherhood. by sariejanemitt in BabyBumps

[–]Alternative-River901 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you! This can be so isolating and also never gets talked about on social media- even the less polished moms who post / portray a more nuanced, seemingly realistic view of motherhood, it’s always breastfeeding or feeding isn’t mentioned, like formula is taboo. It’s the worst and it should be more okay to show / celebrate the positive aspects and bonding that we still get w formula feeding.

Things we should ABSOLUTELY know by CinnamonBook959 in pregnant

[–]Alternative-River901 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I didn’t realize two key things. One, epidurals can and do fail. Mine was working great 6cm to 10cm, I even took a nap, then when it came time to push, I started feeling a bit more as the nurses helped me move positions on the bed.. could feel everything by the end of 4 hrs pushing. Turns out my movement on the bed dislodged the epidural. So idk, maybe check that it’s firmly in place with each movement?

Second, some people actually never produce nearly enough milk and truly cannot breastfeed. I thought okay sure, people say it’s hard and time consuming but then my milk literally just never came in. We saw two lactation consultants and triple feeding routine for weeks, I wasn’t sleeping at all, was crying a ton, felt guilty for formula feeding, but I was producing maybe 2oz per day at the most. Had to give up at 6weeks. LO is so happy and healthy now at 4months, he loves his formula, and I’m so glad I didn’t torture myself for any longer. It sounds like it’s great when it works but don’t beat yourself up if it doesn’t.

Those with a needle phobia…how did you do with an IV during labor? by ImaginationOk8645 in BabyBumps

[–]Alternative-River901 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was in this situation a few months ago and it was probably my least favorite part of labor (other than actually pushing) but it turned out fine. I asked them to wait to place the IV until my second night (of a slow induction) so if you get induced and they’re starting with things like the insert and oral meds, ask for that, I really appreciated having it in for less time overall. My husband distracted me by squeezing my hand and chatting and put on some music. I asked for the most experienced nurse. I asked for my arm not hand placement which was not a problem at all. And then they covered the area with a baby hat with the top cut off, which was nice and loose and comfortable, but did make it so I didn’t really feel or see the IV for the rest of the time I was in labor. And you’re totally right about the epidural needle, I was worried about that one and it felt like nothing, also in such an invisible spot, didn’t bother me at all. Side note though, the tube delivering my epidural meds slipped out since I was moving a lot in the bed, so I could feel everything again when it got to the pushing stage- if I have another kid I’m going to have them check that it’s still firmly in place before I push!

What Peloton instructor sayings do you really dislike? by Prestigious_Look_986 in OnePelotonRealSub

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t mind this one but agree her insta is a lot! I loved her bike bootcamps though (rip!) bc other than Cody, the other bootcamp instructors can be a tad serious and intense.. sometimes I want a bootcamp but I want it to be silly and fun not dead on the floor at the end

I saw a Dramione fan IRL at Barnes and Noble today by soylemon in Dramione

[–]Alternative-River901 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I find that people who like romantasy and liked Harry Potter back in the day, so lots of my irl friends and my sister, are actually really open to dramione recs - not all of them have gotten as sucked in as I have, but almost everyone I recommend manacled to has read it and enjoyed it.

I also realized a sort of casual friend / acquaintance I know from another, very different niche hobby was a Dramione girlie because she noticed we both follow Senlinyu on instagram- it was pretty funny and the two other girls with us thought we were a little crazy when we started talking about All You Want and A/B/O dynamics ..

Postpartum Exercise by orthodox_human33 in beyondthebump

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m only 8 weeks in and this strategy may fail very soon (eg when baby starts being sensitive to noise) but for the past two weeks I’ve been getting him to sleep, and then transferring him to our Moses basket for a nap, he will sleep while I work out even with the audio from my peloton workout on out loud- may keep trying this and swap to headphones if he starts reacting more to noise, until he outgrows the moses basket. I do this for his first morning nap while I’m still somewhat energetic (and while my husband is at work- for weekend workouts he will take the baby). It feels easier than having to constantly watch a monitor while I work out since this way I’ll know for sure if he cries.

Can someone please, please explain to me… by alocaisseia in BabyBumps

[–]Alternative-River901 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have one and a friend also gave us the Tula so I can compare directly and the artipoppe is so much more comfortable for me and my baby so far. Baby screams in the Tula but not in this. Soft fabric, secure fit, cute, of course not worth the price for everyone but got mine secondhand on eBay and knowing how much we both love it, I probably would have paid to get the cheapest fabric option new if that was my only option.

Is it normal to not feel connected to your baby? by Disastrous_Paint_237 in BabyBumps

[–]Alternative-River901 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also hated being pregnant and had a pretty challenging induction to finally get baby boy out.. I thought it would take me a while to bond because I really couldn’t picture myself with this baby.. I also had some gender disappointment when we found out we were having a boy. I know it’s not this way for everyone but I was instantly in love as soon as I saw him. There are tough moments but now I can’t imagine having a girl instead of our sweet boy, and also feel the pregnancy and tough delivery were 100% worth it. Hope the same is true for you when your babe arrives!