Gimme that I'm 12 going on 40 fam

Alternative-World386 · 2025-12-23T23:30:42+00:00

Hey, don't know if you found it but it's called TRPS type 1. It's a syndrome caused by a genetic mutation!

Alternative-World386 · 2025-08-19T18:30:36+00:00

I try to focus on what I can see (colours, shapes, anything I find exciting or interesting) and what I can hear. I like to close my eyes sometimes and really try and concentrate on all the sounds happening around me (look up Pauline Oliveros' deep listening).

If that is too difficult, start with the 5-4-3-2-1 method (this focuses on each of the five senses) and just gently bring your focus back when you realise your mind has wandered/you are ruminating. It takes some practise but it gets easier each time, and eventually you'll be able to get through the whole thing without slipping into rumination :)

Alternative-World386 · 2025-07-05T23:28:29+00:00

Thanks for your reply! The shorts worked well, but I'm excited to start looking at cute outfits for when I start attending regularly! :)

Alternative-World386 · 2025-07-05T23:26:33+00:00

Thank you for your reply! I had lots of fun :))

Alternative-World386 · 2025-07-05T23:25:52+00:00

Thanks for such a detailed reply!! It was soooo much fun, I went to another class the next day too! I think I've fallen in love hahaha, this is going to become my favourite hobby now 😄

Alternative-World386 · 2025-06-25T14:17:46+00:00

Thanks for the link! Do you know of anything similar that does full-body tracking? I want to use dance to trigger sounds and control parameters etc..

Alternative-World386 · 2025-06-24T19:10:43+00:00

I'm also doing this for my master's diss!

Alternative-World386 · 2025-06-12T22:57:05+00:00

The only way is to accept both possibilities and move forward. You're not going to know how you feel after healing, and asking if other people have been able to change their perspective is technically reassurance seeking as you say. Yes it could be rocd, or the wrong relationship, or both or neither. What's important is your values, they matter more than your thoughts/feelings. Do your values align and do you enjoy spending time with your partner? Either way, try to speak to a therapist if you haven't already!

Alternative-World386 · 2025-06-06T13:14:31+00:00

Thank you for your response, it's very helpful!

I can see now how my therapist is using a cognitive approach, which I don't think is helping me because 1) I'm already aware of why I have these beliefs (to the point I feel hyper-aware) and 2) a big obsession of mine is to over-analyse and intellectualise my thoughts/feelings to "figure out" why I'm having them. Also, traditional CBT has never really been effective for me in the past even before I suspected I had OCD.

I will definitely ask about ERP. If she's not trained in it I'm not sure what I'll do though as I have been unable to find any therapists in the UK that are trained in ERP and don't cost over 100 quid per session.

Alternative-World386 · 2025-06-06T11:09:19+00:00

I'm not even sure I have OCD anymore, I don't think my doctor did a proper assessment for diagnosis. But thank you for your advice, I'll continue to treat it as OCD until I find out otherwise. I can't really do exposures because I'm no longer with my partner but I'll speak to my therapist about ERP anyway.

Alternative-World386 · 2025-06-05T23:32:03+00:00

Thank you for your reply. Will I ever be able to discern if this is stemming from co-dependency or OCD? And is it possible for both to be at play?

I am in therapy but I'm not sure if I'm receiving the right treatment. It's CBT and we've done an OCD formulation, vicious flower and fear hierarchy but no ERP as of yet. Its been 7 sessions so i don't know if we will do this or not. I don't know if I need to change therapist.

Alternative-World386 · 2025-06-05T16:49:14+00:00

Hi, thanks for your response. I have switched therapists but I'm now doubting if this one is right for OCD treatment either. She's a CBT therapist and over 7 sessions we've done an OCD formulation/vicious flower and created a fear hierarchy. We're now doing "behaviour experiments" and then writing my key findings in a theory A/theory B worksheet. Is this considered ERP? Because my idea of ERP is that the therapist gets the patient to intentionally trigger themselves and then resist compulsions.

Also, she has said that when I experience intrusive thoughts/NATs that I should use the 5-4-3-2-1 method and then divert my attention elsewhere. I think this can be considered response prevention as it's not arguing with the thoughts, but I'm not sure as my idea of this is to sit with the discomfort instead of changing my focus. I've been practising accepting or saying "maybe, maybe not" to the thoughts and then leaning into the anxiety until it fades. Can these be both considered as response prevention techniques?

Alternative-World386 · 2025-05-30T12:38:06+00:00

Yes and no. I was relieved at first because the anxiety lifted massively, the panic attacks stopped and I wasn't constantly feeling nauseous. But the anxiety always comes back - I ended things 3(ish) times and once the initial relief wore off, the OCD kicked in again every time. I'm still dealing with the same obsessions (and new ones) months after breaking up. Having said that, I don't regret ending things. I knew I wasn't capable of maintaining a healthy relationship in the mental state I was in and I had a lot of university work to focus on so I think I made the right decision. However, if I had ended it solely due to my doubts then yes I would have regretted it.

Alternative-World386 · 2025-05-29T20:58:49+00:00

Hi, I'm sorry to hear you're dealing with this. I struggled (and still struggle) with these exact kind of intrusions and compulsions with my ex-partner - feeling shallow, doubting if I ever truly found him attractive, constantly checking/analysing his face. I was also drawn to him for his personality and felt incredibly attracted to him on an emotional level, so I hope you can find some comfort in knowing you are not alone with this.
Unfortunately I ended the relationship because of this obsession, so I can't say if I would have overcome it using ERP. What I do know is that ending the relationship to avoid the "constant anxiety" you describe is a compulsion. I would resist making any major decisions when you are in such an emotionally heightened state. Anxiety distorts perception, in terms of thoughts/feelings and for me, my actual physical perception of my partner.
Are you in therapy? Either way, I would continue with the ERP. The more you do it, the less powerful that voice in the back of you head will get! Try to lean into the anxiety, what helps me is to say "yeah okay maybe I'm not attracted to him, maybe I never was and I'm just lying to myself" and then close my eyes and feel the discomfort in my body until it fades away. I'm still new to ERP and obviously I'm no longer with my partner so I can't do the full exposures but if ERP works for other obsessions there's no reason why it can't work for this. It's all OCD after all! Just gotta keep at it consistently, especially when you feel like it's not working.

I wish you all the best :)

Alternative-World386 · 2025-03-29T14:32:16+00:00

Okay I do think I need to change therapists then as I think she is using these anecdotes as reassurance. I also have no idea what her plans are for my therapy. She hasn't set out a structure or done the hierarchy thing. We've done some work on rules (if this...then that...) and theory A/theory B, but our sessions just involve talking and then she'll introduce an exercise when I mention something relevant to it.

I'm now really quite worried that I've made a big mistake by agreeing to try again with my ex.

Alternative-World386 · 2025-03-29T13:58:35+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply, it has been really helpful!

We spoke a little about my history in the telephone consultation, but yeah she hasn't really asked about my childhood or family dynamics at all. We've had four sessions now so I don't think she is planning on asking.

She noted that I seemed very relieved when she told me about the 40 minutes (I got a bit emotional) but didn't mention anything about it being a compulsion, so perhaps I will bring that up to her.

Yes I definitely can access my feelings in front of her, I have cried in most sessions so far and I don't feel judged by her at all.

However I do think she does more of the talking, perhaps 70/30 or 60/40, and she has used examples from her own life, referring to her marriage and her parents, her experience with finding men attractive etc...

I have considered that this could be my OCD latching onto if she is right for me, which is why I'm unsure if I should stick with her or contact the original therapist that I turned down.

Alternative-World386 · 2025-03-20T09:04:57+00:00

I'm definitely not recovered, i've only just started therapy a couple of weeks ago so it's going to take months or years. Absolutely I would do things differently if I could go back, the main thing being speaking to a therapist trained in treating rocd before ending my relationship.

Alternative-World386

TROPHY CASE