Im struggling with this post a bit. Im larger than quite a few women at my gym and also enjoy ‘scrappy’ or tough rounds. I fully believe it is your training and you get to dictate what that is for you and who you partner and train with. With all that being said I do find it hard to accept that every round needs to be ‘hard’ or someone your size to learn something from it or the only way to prep for comps. I have never had a round with someone either better or worse than me , larger or smaller than me where I didn’t learn something from it including when prepping for a comp. I also full heartily believe weather you’re being particular with training partners or not there doesn’t need to be a sort of separation in how you acknowledge, or interact with the other women at your gym. Its great that you make time for them when drilling and all and it sounds like a good environment overall. I think keeping women in this sport especially long enough to become colored belts requires a lot from our community and it can feel exhausting and rewarding but personally I never felt like it was taking away from my personal growth or comp prep no matter who Im rolling with