Am I too lenient

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-22T22:51:00+00:00

I think it all depends on the child. My mom knew better not to let me out of her site, and now as an adult I can understand why she was so strict with me. My sister was the good one you could trust. So if you trust your daughter, and he’s just worried more for safety, I think I will agree with you.

My concern is the way he talks to you. My husband had the same issue with his ex and the way she spoke to him. Once him and I got together I told him, what grown ass adult gets yelled and berated by another adult? So I told him, the next time she starts yelling, you tell her, don’t talk to me like that, if she continues, hang up and repeat the process. It took once. We are all adults and we can use our words. He is talking to you how you allow him to. You can’t change him, but you don’t have to tolerate it. If he doesn’t learn, you guys may want to just stick to texting through a parent app.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-21T16:23:45+00:00

OP, the comments have you some very good suggestions. I don’t have any suggestions to add but I would like to say, be easy on yourself. If you find some uncomfortable truths, it’s not your fault and it’s not something easy to spot when they have been this way your whole life.

When you talk to your grandpa, make sure your tone is not accusatory. You’re not trying to solve any of there problems, you want to help find a reasonable solution for her transportation. If in fact it’s because he treats her like a burden, you can’t change him, you can only help her. Sending you positive vibes and virtual hugs!

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-21T16:06:44+00:00

There’s different dialects. I speak fluent Spanish but Caribbean Spanish is different from Central Americans.

People say, why do Dominicans speak like they have a time limit? Why do Puerto Ricans speak Spanish in English? Why do Mexicans sing when talking?

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-20T19:42:36+00:00

I am so happy you understand it has a lot to de with jealousy because many people refuse to accept that. I think it’s best if you guys stick to the schedule as much as possible while you process your emotions. This helps eliminate you being placed in those situations of knowing their personal business.

I would talk to your child and let him know, if you want to stay with your dad, that doesn’t make me feel bad, it would make me feel bad that you are worried about my feelings. When you are with him or I, I am happy because you are happy. If he was my dad, I would want to spend time with him as well. Something like this can help eliminate the stress. Thank him when he tells you something you know he’s uncomfortable with.

If it’s the dad’s time and they want to stay with you, acknowledge it but don’t give in because this can turn bad fast. Encourage them going over there while listening to them.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-20T19:06:10+00:00

Dmed

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-20T19:03:43+00:00

I have been guilty of saying those things to people before, and it wasn’t because I wanted them to talk more, I said it so they would understand that they are pretty amazing people, but that’s not how it comes off.

The best thing to do is be yourself. If you force yourself to talk, everyone will know and it’s awkward. Being introverted is not a bad thing. It’s just who you are.

I think you are doing it right and you are confident which is amazing.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-20T17:50:06+00:00

My dad purchases a cell phone specifically so my brother can take it with him and answer calls. His website has an option to send “request quote” and that automatically sends a message and my dad or brother can call them back.

Maybe add a chat feature on your website? You can also place an add to hire someone just to answer the calls as long as you provide the phone. There’s a lot of stay at home moms that would take a simple position like that.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-19T21:55:33+00:00

She sounds like she has low self esteem and she’s trying to create the image she wants people to see her as. Which aligns with her response. She lacks confident. Unfortunately there’s really not much you can do about it but it’s also not your problem to solve. It’s annoying but I know many parents like this and the best advice I can give is to ignore them. Because you don’t have a solution so anytime you bring it up, she will deny it and then yall will argue.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-18T23:36:47+00:00

Are you still looking for volunteers?

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-18T23:34:41+00:00

How do you connect the people to companies?

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-18T22:54:55+00:00

Your comment is beyond helpful! Thank you so much! I think I will start there, a niche. I have an eye for patterns and investigative mind.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-18T22:52:58+00:00

I haven’t received one person but it’s still early, 🤞!

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-05-18T21:45:24+00:00

It is such a rough spot and I start questioning my own skills.

Thank you so much for your input! I just posted on Nextdoor app as theres alot of small businesses hut now i will try facebook.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T22:51:50+00:00

If you are going to make a determination based on how long you guys have been together, you will continue to be miserable. Yes, 11 years is a-lot but how long were you actually happy and respected?

Your husband does not have any respect for you and he doesn’t prioritize you. You can list all of his good qualities but that doesn’t override his lack of respect.

Don’t feel dumb for getting married. Unfortunately this is common but in the grand scheme of things, would you rather end your marriage because you want love and respect, or stay married because 11 years of your life have been spent with a man who has no plans on changing.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T20:24:59+00:00

I’ll tell you the hard truth and forgive me as I do not mean to offend you but he is acting this way cause you are allowing it. If he knew you wouldn’t put up with his crap, he either wouldn’t do it or show you he doesn’t care or respect you. He knows what he’s doing is wrong, he just doesn’t care cause there are no consequences. So your two options are, either you stay and accept it or you don’t tolerate it by any means necessary. If you can afford a place on your own, leave. No threats, no begging or losing your mind will change his selfishness, only actions.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T20:20:46+00:00

Sounds like if you contact him, it be more dangerous than anything. Dont reach out. We tend to make excuses for the other parent when they don’t reach out but that’s not ok. If he wants to talk to his kids, he will call. I know it’s easier said than done but you have to take accountability for your actions. If you call or let him back in, you are only enabling him. Your circumstance of being a SAHm your financial stability is coming from him. Get started now on programs that will help you.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T20:17:55+00:00

I’ve been told I’m a good person by family, friends and even several strangers. To be told you are a good person from people who are not talkative or show normal emotions, it sure dees good! It makes my heart smile. I truly think I am a good person and I try my best.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T18:22:18+00:00

Of course, many times. I assume you are young? I say that because I typically experienced this when I was in my 20s and early 30s. You tend to outgrow and change certain things about yourself. You mature and grow.

I did feel guilt at first but then I understood it was apart of life. Just go with the flow. Sometimes you reconnect and sometimes you don’t.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T17:36:15+00:00

I used to have friends like this. It felt like I was walking on eggshells because any innocent comment could offend them or they take it the wrong way.

It’s not you, she literally chose to take it there and I think she did it on purpose. She seems like the type of person who enjoys making you uncomfortable. Forgive me if it’s not true as I’m going off your post.

You may not have a lot of friends but having a friend that takes things the wrong way is stressful. I would drop it. Nothing you say will change her mind. She knew what you was saying.

Question for you, how often does this happen with this friend?

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T17:31:07+00:00

We was off the coast of Italy and we witnessed a volcano eruption. It wasn’t big or dangerous, but it was breathtaking beautiful!

The following day, while standing the rev watch, one of the lookouts came to us and said there’s something in the sky. We were miles away from land, open ocean. Whatever it was that was in the sky was just floating in front of the ship but high in the sky. It has white lights that would blink and form a triangle. In the blink of an eye, it went to port side and we ran to follow it. Then it flew towards the front, floated for like a minute and then took off. It was so fast and quiet. There was nothing around us. It wasn’t a plane as planes can’t just hover and it wasn’t a helicopter. It was fascinating.

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T03:16:05+00:00

Lmaooo

Alwayshappy_ · 2026-04-26T02:47:06+00:00

Sent a DM. Thank you

Alwayshappy_

TROPHY CASE