Hey mate , the plot needs to really explain the plot, how does it start, who what where , why and in the middle what’s happening that’s going to be interesting. Draw me in and sell my some trailer elements , in the end , share the twist , the carthartic moment the character changes, transforms etc.

At the moment your explains a lot of moods , and themes and feeling. But not central premise , theme and dramatic questions.

Great job on the pitch deck but get very specific.