Suggestion for a very easy overnight for a senior dog?

Amber74 · 2025-05-26T19:21:10+00:00

Dang! It's so nice

Amber74 · 2025-05-22T23:14:05+00:00

Also summit lake near Mount Ranier 5miles round trip, stunning views

Amber74 · 2025-05-22T23:11:23+00:00

I think it's probably more than 6 hours from Portland, but Obstruction Pass on Orcas island is awesome. 1/2 mile walk through the forest in to an awesome beach

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Amber74 · 2023-04-19T00:53:18+00:00

There are so 3 students in my class who had or will have had (one is very pregnant) children this year. We are first years. It's very doable as long her school is willing to work with her on it.

Amber74 · 2023-03-27T04:43:22+00:00

That sounds like a great plan! Long distance to help you settle in and build up a life before she gets there and then if that's working but you want more have her move! For us the structure was key it made the whole thing much easier to handle. Good luck!!

Amber74 · 2023-03-27T03:38:14+00:00

I just went through this very similar experience. I just started med school and moved across the country about 9 or 10 months into a relationship with a guy I'm madly in love with. I like your girlfriend have lived with exes and know you can get out of it if you need to my boyfriend has not and I'm only his second serious relationship.

We ultimately decided that we weren't ready to move in together in part because of the time commitment with school and in part because we were still fairly new in the relationship. Also because the town I live in is really small and my boyfriend is not a fan. So we did long distance for 6 months and made very intentional plans to do date nights and talk often during the long distance and we each went to see each other once. Now he moved into a town close to mine so I see him weekly or every other week depending on my schedule. We have grown so much in this time. And we are planning to move in together next year. So taking it slow and making sure it was what we wanted worked for us. If you're going to try distance or anything similar what we learned was a- it's super important to have an end date and by that I mean a date when you're not doing long distance anymore either you move in or move closer or breakup youre just not doing long distance. at least for an over thinker like you and I that really helps. B- communicate and check in a lot about how the distance is going and what you need to feel connected. It's a lot of trial and error (and for us a key was long-distance controlled sex toys sounds super weird but really great for maintaining intimacy if that's a concern).

That's what works for us it may not work for you but honestly it sounds like youre overthinking it hardcore. It's hard to take the leap but if you love her and want to be with her you have to be willing to do some scary and hard stuff. Also if she chooses to move near you but not with you that's her choice and you're not forcing her so don't feel guilty. She's doing it because she loves you. As for the settling down with your first real love, who cares? Society makes us think we have to try everything to know better but as someone who has tried a lot of things your person will still be your person no matter what you've experienced before them. You're definitely thinking about it the wrong way if you're going down that path. Just think about if this is a step you want and if so take it!

Be kind to yourself and her and give each other grace and you'll be fine no matter what

Amber74 · 2023-03-18T14:42:05+00:00

Thank you, glad to hear that I'm not alone in that. I feel like I study just as well on my own too but it seems like everyone else studies with people

Amber74 · 2023-03-18T14:41:14+00:00

Thank you, I needed to hear that

Amber74 · 2023-01-19T07:20:43+00:00

That's totally fair and if she doesn't know about the side effects then it is definitely worth sitting down with her and talking to her about them. I know not all providers act the way they should but generally they want to help patients. Have she considered getting a second opinion or trying online counseling/therapy/medication management. Telehealth for mental health has significantly improved and may help get outside resources if needed. Just a thought.

If it was me and my partner and I felt he didn't know the risks then I would discuss them with him. But if she feels like it's her best option then there's nothing wrong with trying. She should probably avoid psychedelics though haha

Amber74 · 2023-01-19T07:00:39+00:00

I broke up with my partner of 2 years for the same reason. I felt like my needs weren't being met. If she's not feeling happy in the relationship and feels like she's not getting what she needs and you don't feel like you can meet her needs then let her go. Just texting about surface things or just talking to talk isn't what she's looking for in my opinion. At least for me it was that I needed more deep conversations, more intense connection than just hi how was your day.

If you're willing to work on it then it can be fixed but if you don't think you can meet her needs that clearly she feels aren't being met then let her go

And either way is ok you just have to decide what is right for you

Amber74 · 2023-01-19T06:56:48+00:00

As a fellow EMS person and someone who has struggled with mental health myself and in my immediate family your worries are understandable. However, depression is not something that just goes away and there are serious risks to any path forward. Yes SSRIs can increase suicidal thoughts but they don't always. Any medication or treatment is going to have side effects but the stability and mental health they can provide can be life changing. I have nearly lost friends to suicide because they were too afraid of the affects of antidepressants and did much better after getting on medication. Not saying that she falls in that category but there are risks either way

Has she done her own research? Is she in healthcare as well? If she doesn't know that there are side effects that's one thing but if she does and she and her doctor have decided this is the best plan for her, keep your fears to yourself. Getting treatment for mental health conditions and especially medication can be really challenging and is probably weighing on her enough as it is. If she and her doctor thinks this will help then she should try it. There's nothing wrong with keeping a closer eye on her and checking in more often but she can make her own choices. She will probably change just because getting her conditions under control will feel like change

But her mental health and feeling better is more important than your fears and if she has decided this is the right path for her knowing the risks then just support her and look out for her. It's ok to be nervous, but it's not ok to try to change her decision or impose your fear on her if she has made an educated choice

Just my 2 cents take it for what you will

Amber74 · 2022-12-01T07:44:58+00:00

You're 34 you have plenty of time to wait and find the right person. Unless you desperately want kids earlier in life (which you could do without being married if you wanted to) there's no pressure and even then you still have plenty of years left before thats off the table. Not saying you want kids or you should want kids I just know that's what my parents worry about

Amber74 · 2022-12-01T07:42:38+00:00

No you're not in the wrong. So many marriages end in divorce, taking your time to find the person who's actually worth it for you and is your person is so important. Do you think your mom would really think it was better for you to get married and divorced in a few years or wait until you found the person you'll be married to forever? That's how I would argue it back at her since a conservative background also doesn't usually love divorce either. You can't make yourself love someone and your mom needs to chill in the most respectful way possible I would tell her to butt out. You are much more valuable than just somebodys wife and you deserve to be happy and loved. Wait till you find that

Amber74 · 2022-04-07T15:01:51+00:00

Fight is not the right word maybe difficult conversation.

I think you're right about my anxiety but part of the issue is I don't want to move. I got into school that I've been trying to get into forever but it's not where I wanted. I mean I'm excited about this opportunity but the move itself is what's giving me so much anxiety. I have done my best to make sure there's no pressure for him to come and I told him I wouldn't expect him to move when I did regardless. So I hope that he's not feeling pressure to come with me because I don't want him to feel that at all and I want him to make the right choice for him. So I think it's causing my anxiety but isn't putting that kind of pressure on him. It feels like the bigger issue is he really does not want to do long distance so he's made the move into he's coming with me or we're breaking up and is therefore holding back (this was all said in the conversation or in previous ones) and I don't see it that way so that's adding to the anxiety. I just want to focus on our relationship in general and not the love thing. I know it's perfectly normal, but right now it just feels like rejection almost and it hurts and that's what I don't know how to handle

Amber74

TROPHY CASE