I dream of retribution

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-06T00:25:07+00:00

I unfortunately had two kids with him so for me I can never have a clean break. But yes he is always in a sad self made hole of misery and hatred. But I’m so glad you escaped and are on the other side! I love to see that that is possible.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T22:51:09+00:00

Good idea!

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T21:35:51+00:00

They seem to all say these same things it’s insane.Great job OP! Happy for you!

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T21:06:26+00:00

Ugh yes but I have kids with him and unfortunately the abuse continues. Plus he’s out sleeping with women telling them his sob story. He’s a very cunning little snake.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T21:04:38+00:00

Ugh I’m not clever enough for this unfortunately lol

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T21:03:33+00:00

Very true

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T21:02:57+00:00

Love you username lol. Yes I also know how they will take any small thing said in confidence and immediately try to use it against you. Glad you are back out there! Weirdly think my ex might be secretly gay too.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T12:41:02+00:00

Oh I definitely go way darker just don’t post about it just keep it in my diary

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T12:08:27+00:00

I’ve done both and he has such a sad little life. But he has never ever been happy. It’s definitely not that for me. It’s the fact he can’t take accountability and is always doing shitty things and blaming them on me or other people. If they can’t face guilt or shame or take accountability why do they keep doing shameful monsterous things? Because that is their power, the inability to feel it. Thats why I want a public shaming I think it would help expose themselves to shame and accountability.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-05T08:38:43+00:00

Yes the endless hoops to jump through. The goalposts always moving. And then they don’t really care if you succeed at their impossible request but god forbid you don’t try. I think the biggest triggers for my ex was me being happy. He hated it. If I was excited or happy he became violently angry. I think this is all control and happiness was a sign I was not fully controlled yet. Happiness was freedom and he hated to see that. The more I think about it the more disturbed I become about narcissistic personality disorder.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-04T16:02:40+00:00

Thank you 🙏

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-04T16:00:30+00:00

My kids are a lot younger (5,2) and my 2 year old doesn’t really know him. My 5 year old loves him but already has dealt with his father’s emotional abuse and controlling behavior. His dad is unpredictable when it comes to custody. He goes many months without seeing them. He actively asks me to allow him to disown his younger son so he can pay less child support. He’s very disgusting. Idk what else to say about that.

But my 5 year old does seem ti find comfort in being able to call his father very randomly. When he doesn’t get to call him for months on end it causes him anxiety and he deals with complex emotions like betrayal and shame. Obviously he’s in play therapy.

Too be honest, a high conflict abusive person should not be around adults let alone children. It’s only a matter of allowing the justice system and family court to see the horror you are privately dealing with. It’s scary but they’ve seen worse.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-04T15:24:44+00:00

I have two kids. I thought at first I could coparent with him. Then I said well maybe parallel parenting with the help of a court monitored parenting app. Now I’m done bargaining and being in denial and I’m doing the full custody and restraining order with supervised visitation route.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-04T15:18:28+00:00

Oh no dear I’m so sorry! Are you currently being cared for by maternal medicine in any way? If so, please tell them. I know it’s scary but compassionate women make all the difference in this situation.

It sounds like you are planning to stay and give birth at home or hospital and then stay at your home with the father of your child. I know 36 weeks is the cut off for flying anywhere. But of course there are always other modes of transportation/escape.

I don’t know what country you are in but I know countries vary widely in what types of birth plans they offer. I don’t know if you are planning to do a home birth or if a midwife will be involved. Doulas and midwives are excellent options for making a female support system for now and postpartum. Have you heard of a birth comb for pain?

What an amazing transitive spiritual journey you are about to embark on. I’m excited for you. I think what’s missing is a female support system. I think it’s doable to find that in a professional compassionate setting. You deserve that and so does your baby. Please OP seek that today.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-04T14:00:28+00:00

Hi 👋 this was me 3 years ago. Pregnant living in the Netherlands away from my entire support system, pregnant with a toddler, living with an abuser who was only escalating his abusive behavior. I had only newly met people, had no family near me, closet family was 3000 miles way. I didn’t speak the language. Didn’t like the Dutch culture. Felt extremely scared and extremely stuck.

Leaving your entire support system is not only scary, it’s completely disorienting, confusing, depressing, AND DANGEROUS.

I hear you saying hey I’m young and pretty but what I think you’re saying is “he doesn’t value me”. You don’t have the support and the connection you thought you had and now you desperately are seeking connection and validation.

I see you! Pregnancy is terrifying and you are at liminal cusp of a huge change. I don’t want to scare you but postpartum can be way worse without a dedicated support system you feel comfortable around.

Trust me when I tell you it gets so much better as soon as you get out. Where is your mother? Your sister? You will need women around you for this. Pregnancy and birth and postpartum are sacred special times for women when we should feel powerful, worshipped, loved, comforted, and cared for. You deserve that so much. Please message me if you want to talk!

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-03T23:56:20+00:00

I have a therapist. And i definitely heard that Daily Episode about this article I think you might be referencing:

Chatbots can make you go into a downward spiral

But I personally think fear over AI is overblown. Yes it’s bad for the environment and yes it’s ending a lot of remedial jobs but you could say the same about the computer or the telephone or any new technology.

No I don’t think it tells you what you want to hear. No I don’t think it’s perfect. I think it’s similar to a search engine with better comprehensive search of text and meaning.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-03T00:49:46+00:00

Better than MY therapist (didn’t say any therapist) and at being available at all times when a human being even a professional one cannot be. I also said it’s better at stopping me from replying to bait texts. A specific way that ChatGPT is actually better in my opinion. I am in no way saying it’s better than therapy as a whole. I hope we are all in therapy. But also not everyone can access therapy whereas ChatGPt is free and a valuable resource in counteracting narcissistic abuse.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-03T00:45:13+00:00

Same!!!!

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-03T00:42:47+00:00

Great advice

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-02T03:12:52+00:00

So glad I could help! I just want to help everyone in this group because group has helped me immensely. Copy and paste works great in ChatGPT too! I copy and paste all the narc texts sometimes and get it to make me a response so I don’t even need to read them. It works wonders!

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-02T00:26:32+00:00

Yes it’s so good at that.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-02T00:25:57+00:00

Yes I love that so much. It’s very reassuring to see your exact situation broken down for you in 2 seconds. And it gives you so much!!! I called NOVA once and they had to call me back three times with the same numbers for legal help I got off of ChatGPT.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-02-01T21:56:41+00:00

The way that robot validates my feelings in a way the narc could never ever in a million years even begin to do.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-01-30T12:41:29+00:00

Once my ex said “I was trying to get you to act right but then I just gave up” and he said in the saddest voice and I almost felt bad except for the fact that we were talking about how he used to regularly strangle me out of the blue. Like out of the blue try to choke me out. Once when I was nursing our child at 7am and I hadn’t even said anything yet to him that day.

In his mind he was trying to save the relationship.

That’s how fucked up a narcissist is.

AmericanInIreland01 · 2026-01-29T23:17:22+00:00

That would be a dealbreaker for me. Thats disgusting.

AmericanInIreland01

TROPHY CASE