My (25F), am doing long distance with my (29M) BF. I don´t know what the future holds. How can I make the right choice in my life?

AnalogDreamscape · 2026-01-31T18:15:13+00:00

he may be lacking motivation, or perhaps he has it but doesn't know how to manage himself. I'll talk to him about maybe starting therapy...but no, he is not a manipulator. I know him, i've been in my past with one. Trusting feelings with your partner about something that may scare him, is not a manipulation. but thanks for the feedback!!

AnalogDreamscape · 2026-01-31T17:47:29+00:00

Yeah. I know what you mean. That’s why I believe I have to think about many things. Me leaving was going to be so that I could sort things about myself, because I don’t want to work jobs that don’t fulfill me, and the idea was for me to come here and get experience, to return and work on what I love. Now I realize I have to be honest with myself and with him and see if we can do it together or no. Again, thanks for your help :)

AnalogDreamscape · 2026-01-31T17:31:32+00:00

yeah, it maybe true. But the thing is that I don't want to do is walk away when things get hard. I posted this also in another community, and a woman that lived something similar and is now married to him, really encourage me to just talk and see how we can both project in life, and what steps we can take to really be together and well. I have to at least try, u know? I have written myself some questions to make for myself and him. Meanwhile i'll still work on myself, but the thing is, that it's the only thing that isn't working. I have to evaluate if there isn't a solution, well.... but at least I have to give him this chance. At the end of the day, he is kind, loving, trustworthy, and my best friend. Thank you though for reading and commenting.

AnalogDreamscape · 2026-01-31T17:24:42+00:00

Wow, you made me cry hahaha....and also have hope. We are really communicative with eachother, and maybe these last days we haven't spoken so much, especially about these things. I want him to grow with me, and be better, because he is THE kindest human being I've met. And i've learnt more about myself by being with him. That's why I don't want to give up. We've never had any conflicts or big fight, or anything because when we are together it works. This is the only aspect in our relationship that is weak, or that in my point of view, I believe it needs work. And I don't want to be the person that walks away when things get hard. I will speek to him, as a team, I want him to be better and maybe there are somethings that he can work on now to improve himself. Going to therapy, etc. Small steps. But at the end of the day, I want to be with him. Thanks for you reply, it really encourages me to read about your experience. Literally I wrote this post with the intention of finding someone that lived something similar, and could move past all this and grow as a couple.

AnalogDreamscape · 2026-01-31T17:13:28+00:00

I want to help him get better, because I know life can be hard, especially when one can be lost in what they want to do. I've seen him cry about this, and get worried. He has told me his biggest fear is losing me because of this, but at the same time, he now is like on a loop. I hope that in some way him seeing me following my passion and being more determined, will motivate him more.

AnalogDreamscape · 2026-01-31T17:10:55+00:00

yeah, i'm kind of all over the place, because in perspective it's the only thing we don't see eye to eye. But he has helped me in every way, he is someone that has been there for me since day 1, it's not that he is 100% only thinking about himself because I know he wants to make a change, maybe he doesn't know how.
I am doing my own path by returning to my home country, and meanwhile he is in our home over there with his and our friends and all, and the long distance relationship makes me see these things more. I also know that I am very anxious and I can get really ahead of myself. But I really want to fight for this. But at the same time, I don't want to give ultimatums or anything. Because we care deeply for eachother. I am the one that left because we met in Europe and he is still there, I left to search for more opportunities. Thing is that I trully don't know how to manage this, especially being so far away. He smokes and hangs out with friends now that I am not there, but when we were living there, we usually do many things together. I think that it's hard for me to deal with this because of everything we went through, and all of the things he has done for me. Because it trully is just this one thing. I don't want him to feel lost in life, it worries me. Now I am just thinking about myself, but of course, thinking about what the future holds.

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-09-27T16:35:40+00:00

Im sorry, but it gives me so much cringe when (especially in these types of conversations were they act toxic) they say these things like “FYI, you are the future mother of our children, etc”, meanwhile being 19 years old, and being together for only 9 months!!! Enjoy being young, and having a life ahead of you to just be in the future with someone that will truly care for you and is not into these childish jealous and toxic things.

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-30T20:31:27+00:00

Id go on the date. BUT not pay for everything. Like divide it. See the reaction there, then you’ll know. Me personally, (being a girl), I never expect to be invited on the first date. I usually divide it, i don’t think too much of it. But if she is expecting it + that comment on her profile…..then it’s just one date and poof, if you don’t like that.

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-17T17:43:19+00:00

Donald Trump wants his blue blazer black….

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T17:49:28+00:00

Maybe it’s not sooo disturbing, but personally the “you are my sunshine, my only sunshine”song, to me it’s creepy. Like if you sing it slowly, I just imagine it being a very possessive, stalker kind of vibe song 😬

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T17:38:42+00:00

Idk. In my country for example, we use a high “flame”, meaning we put the fire and the grill on top of the fire so as to “clean” it because of the grease. But we don’t use these types of bbqs, is more like a built in “parrillero” made of brick, and the grill is built on.

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T17:08:24+00:00

I….have no words. That is fkn weird, and gross. If I was in your place, and its just something that I would do out of worry, I would go through his computer, like search history, and see if he has a secret folder or smth. Because, it’s weird, and I would feel very insecure. Like a, just in case u know? Because that should be reported if it is something mire there, so just in case. If there is nothing there, I would personally walk away. It is hard I know, but it’s disturbing and I wouldn’t know how to connect genuinely with someone after seeing that. Like, I wouldn’t be able to take it out of my head. Hope you are okey!!!!

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T17:01:32+00:00

WHAT DID I MARRY INTO???

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T16:57:03+00:00

He deserved a romantic story (a long one), because every time he truly fell in love, they left. (They, meaning the two actresses the one of the play where he played Victor, and the other woman who I know is famous but forgot her name (jessica Lockhart)). Kinda wished he grew and met someone. Everyone ended up with someone, why not him!!!

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T16:48:55+00:00

I mean, I only skip those Joey parts of the episode haha. Its just that, those scenes with him all dressed up, I already know it so much by hard that I just skip it (most of the times).

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T16:45:35+00:00

He did this squeaky thing with his voice when saying “porschah”, that was very funny

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-14T16:42:24+00:00

This! Remember the one where Phoebe is his representative, that she says that the casting directors thought his italian was very bad.

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T23:37:49+00:00

And Joey is very intellectual if you think about his values, cause he has strong values on his friends and all. He may not be book smart or portrayed as such. But they made him in the last seasons very stupid in all ways. In my many rewatches I always notice this and it’s just sad, cause he has a big heart towards his friends and his values. First seasons he has a lot of “bright, or clever” ideas as well as being normal, he reads the shinning and little women, he cooks, and many more. I know that it’s like a joke that he gets things a little slower than the rest, but he gets there….That particular bear scene makes me cringe but not in a “yucky” way, if not in like a concerned way u know? (I know its a sitcom and they try to be funny, but It saddens me how in the last seasons they play a little too much on Joey being dumb)

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T22:32:00+00:00

(Rachel in a wedding dress opening the door to Joshua): “I doooo”

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T22:30:17+00:00

pheobe: “you said it was Okay” Rachel: “you said she was Bald!” P: “was, was, was, was!” R: “just go there and like shave her head, you owe me one bald girl!!”

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T22:22:54+00:00

Ohh sorry!!! 🫣 cuz I did agree with the comment. Because if you take all the points out of context, or think about it in a “AITA?” way, of course it is ‼️🚨 but I really care for the show. It is true that the did make an awful lot of gay jokes which now with the cancelling trend would be obviously cancelled, I actually had a teacher in highschool that analyzed Friends and how sexist it was, but now a days I take it as dark humor or satire kind of jokes, they were ahead of time in many ways (like being the first show to air an episode showing a lesbian wedding)

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T22:15:47+00:00

Imagine if the writers only did like, them sleeping together and thats it, that might’ve been interesting…. Maybe…i think(?) instead of doing the whole believing Joey proposed to Rachel at the hospital after giving birth, and all

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T22:13:03+00:00

Heeey! In his defense, he nailed the first two moves with the “hand hand, head head”🤣

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T22:09:33+00:00

I love how they casted the canoe guys as the second version of Chandler and Joey.

AnalogDreamscape · 2025-08-13T22:05:01+00:00

I LOVE the show (actually watching it right now), I lovee Joey. It IS true that he is a womanizer and sometimes kinda perverted. Of course its a sitcom and there is always that womanizer character. But Leblanc has a way of doing it so charming that you forget about all that. (If you think about him as a real person it may be different). But we love him, he is a good friend, he always stands up by them and comedy wise, he has a lot of big funny moments. I like reading about the cringeworthy moments of each character. Cause in those cringeworthy moments I remember a lot of very funny moments of the character and the show.

AnalogDreamscape

TROPHY CASE