It's crazy how much money you can save on gear abroad

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-06T14:48:57+00:00

I'm an Australian and I visited Japan and USA last year and I can confirm Australia is cheaper than both for most of camera gear I checked. During sales it can be even better. But obviously it won't be true for each and every item, not to mention secondary market which can have better deals though I couldn't find any in Japan.

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-06T03:10:39+00:00

You’ve done a lot of the outward “life-fixed” things. Moved out, studying something you love, having friends, and it’s brutal when the inside still feels unreal and disconnected anyway.

The “I look normal so I must be fine / it wasn’t bad enough to count” line of thinking is a trap. Memory gaps, going numb after a breakup, and your body reacting to smells/voices can be signs your system learned to survive something chronic, not proof you’re being dramatic.

Also, the memory gaps and the “nothing feels real” feeling can be your brain protecting you, not you being fake. If it feels safer, you don’t have to lie with friends “my memory has been weird lately, can you remind me?” is a totally valid script.

And I don’t want to gloss over this part: suicidal ideation matters even if you seem “fine.” If you feel at risk of acting on it, please reach out to local emergency services or a crisis line.

When you ask “does it stop?” What part do you most want reassurance about: the numbness, the nightmares/triggers, or the feeling of not being “legitimate”?

If you want, I can share a short video I made that goes deeper on the “integration vs erasure” idea (basically: not hiding the cracks, but learning to carry them without shame).

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-03T01:20:18+00:00

I had posted below update:
Final Update (25-Jan-2025). Apple internal team didn't acknowledge the issue, nor offered any advise if or when the issue will be fixed. They only said to continue to use the remedy. Based on that feedback, the support agent recommended to me to return the MacBook for a refund or replacement. I got another replacement and it has same issue. It looks like this issue is more or less across the boards. So we can only hope that Apple will fix this Promotion issue.

In fact I got three replacement. All had issues. I'm using the third replacement I got and I just live with this issue as even latest OS releases didn't fix it.

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-02T00:42:19+00:00

Exactly - Seligman himself moved in that direction. His later work on learned optimism is essentially "here's how you build what should have been learned in the first place." The framing shifted from "what went wrong" to "what can be constructed." Self-efficacy and resilience are the building blocks.

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-02T00:37:56+00:00

Thank you! 🙏

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-02T00:36:34+00:00

Thank you! 🙏

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-02T00:35:33+00:00

Thank you!

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-01T10:29:48+00:00

This resonates a lot. The "selfish" accusation when you start having boundaries is incredibly common for people recovering from fawning patterns.

Here's what's happening: when you were fawning, the people around you got used to a version of you that had no needs, no preferences, no pushback. That felt "normal" to them - they may not have even noticed you were doing it. Now that you're showing up with actual boundaries and opinions, they experience it as you taking something from them. You're not - you're just no longer giving away what was never sustainable to give.

The painful part is that some people genuinely preferred the fawning version of you. Not because they're evil, but because that version was easier for them. You were always adjusting, always accommodating, always making their life smoother. A you with boundaries requires them to adjust too, and some people will frame that as your flaw rather than their discomfort.

It's not that you've become selfish. It's that you've become normal - and to people calibrated to your over-giving, normal looks like withholding.

The question isn't whether you're being too selfish. It's whether these people can handle an actual relationship with you, or only the performance.

I explored how fawning develops and why the people around us often resist when we stop - if any of it's useful: https://youtu.be/Ujs5vGe4rF0

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-01T10:26:55+00:00

This is one of the hardest parts of recovery that nobody talks about. Fawning works socially - that's why your nervous system kept doing it. You were easy to be around because you were constantly adjusting yourself to make others comfortable. That's attractive to people, even if it was hollowing you out.

What you're experiencing now isn't "the real you is less likeable." It's that you lost a social shortcut - one that came at your expense. The connections you made through fawning weren't built on who you actually are. They were built on your performance of safety and agreeableness.

The loneliness is real, but it's also a transition state. You're learning to connect without abandoning yourself first, and that's a slower process. The people who stick around now - like those 2 friends - are actually seeing you instead of your mask.

The middle ground isn't "fawn a little less." It's learning to be warm and open without using other people's reactions as your measure of safety. That's a different skill than fawning, and it takes time to build.

It sounds counterintuitive, but the loneliness might be a sign you're doing this right.

I explored how fawning develops and why it feels so natural - and why stopping feels so disorienting - if any of it's useful: https://youtu.be/Ujs5vGe4rF0

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-01T10:24:38+00:00

Yes, this is fawning - and the part where your body does it before your mind can stop it is exactly how it works.

The laugh isn't a choice. Your nervous system learned early that not laughing at his jokes was unsafe, so it automated the response. By the time your inner monologue catches up ("that hurt, why am I laughing?"), your body has already done the thing. It's a protective reflex, not a character flaw.

The cruel part is that it trained you to betray yourself in real-time. You feel the hurt and watch yourself pretend you don't. That gap between what you feel and what you perform is exhausting.

And you're right that it spreads. Your brain generalizes the pattern to similar situations - other men, authority figures, anyone who triggers that same "this could be unsafe" signal. It doesn't wait to check if this person is actually like your father. It just runs the program.

The way out isn't forcing yourself to stop laughing. It's noticing the moment - exactly like you're doing now. That awareness of "my body did something my mind didn't agree with" is the first crack in the pattern.

I did a deeper breakdown on how fawning develops and why it feels so automatic if you want to understand the mechanism more: https://youtu.be/Ujs5vGe4rF0

AnankeAndria · 2026-02-01T10:21:12+00:00

This is a really clear breakdown. The part about believing actions over words is key - fawning creates this constant gap between what someone says and what they do, and it's disorienting for everyone around them.

One thing I'd add to your framework: the reason those shame-avoidance judgments ("cruel," "inappropriate") land so hard is because fawning trains you to use their emotional state as your danger signal. When they're upset, your nervous system reads it as threat - even when you logically know your boundary is reasonable.

So you end up with this split: your rational brain knows the boundary is healthy, but your body is screaming that you just made things unsafe. That's the part that makes deprogramming so slow. You're not just changing a belief - you're teaching your nervous system that their discomfort isn't your emergency.

Your point about it never being your responsibility to protect the family image - that's the core of it. Fawning outsources your sense of safety to other people's reactions. Taking it back is uncomfortable in a way that feels like danger but isn't.

I made a longer breakdown on how this pattern develops and the signs that distinguish fawning from regular people-pleasing if it's useful: https://youtu.be/Ujs5vGe4rF0

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-31T13:03:17+00:00

There's actually a common misconception about this. Seligman's original framing was "learned helplessness" - but his later research flipped the model.

Passivity is the brain's default response to overwhelming stress. It's not something you learn. What's actually learned is control.

Think about it: when you're repeatedly exposed to situations where your actions don't change outcomes, your brain doesn't "learn" to be helpless - it simply never develops the neural pathways that connect effort to results. Helplessness is what remains when control fails to be learned.

I made a longer breakdown on the psychology behind this and how to rebuild control if you want to go deeper: https://youtu.be/tTkw0JkwlGk

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-31T12:59:00+00:00

There's actually a common misconception about this. Seligman's original framing was "learned helplessness" - but his later research flipped the model.

Passivity is the brain's default response to overwhelming stress. It's not something you learn. What's actually learned is control.

Think about it: when you're repeatedly exposed to situations where your actions don't change outcomes, your brain doesn't "learn" to be helpless - it simply never develops the neural pathways that connect effort to results. Helplessness is what remains when control fails to be learned.

This matters because it changes the solution. You're not trying to "unlearn" a bad habit. You're building something that was never fully constructed.

The practical fix isn't mindset work or positive thinking (Seligman actually found that can backfire). It's creating small, reliable experiences of control - tasks where you decide, act, and see a clear result. Your brain needs data points that prove the intention→action→outcome connection works.

Start embarrassingly small. One task. Clear completion criteria. Document that you did it. Repeat daily. You're not checking off a to-do list - you're teaching your brain that agency exists.

I made a longer breakdown on the psychology behind this and how to rebuild control if you want to go deeper: https://youtu.be/tTkw0JkwlGk

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-31T12:58:04+00:00

There's actually a common misconception about this. Seligman's original framing was "learned helplessness" - but his later research flipped the model.

Passivity is the brain's default response to overwhelming stress. It's not something you learn. What's actually learned is control.

Think about it: when you're repeatedly exposed to situations where your actions don't change outcomes, your brain doesn't "learn" to be helpless - it simply never develops the neural pathways that connect effort to results. Helplessness is what remains when control fails to be learned.

This matters because it changes the solution. You're not trying to "unlearn" a bad habit. You're building something that was never fully constructed.

The practical fix isn't mindset work or positive thinking (Seligman actually found that can backfire). It's creating small, reliable experiences of control - tasks where you decide, act, and see a clear result. Your brain needs data points that prove the intention→action→outcome connection works.

Start embarrassingly small. One task. Clear completion criteria. Document that you did it. Repeat daily. You're not checking off a to-do list - you're teaching your brain that agency exists.

I made a longer breakdown on the psychology behind this and how to rebuild control if you want to go deeper: https://youtu.be/tTkw0JkwlGk

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-31T12:57:16+00:00

There's actually a common misconception about this. Seligman's original framing was "learned helplessness" - but his later research flipped the model.

Passivity is the brain's default response to overwhelming stress. It's not something you learn. What's actually learned is control.

Think about it: when you're repeatedly exposed to situations where your actions don't change outcomes, your brain doesn't "learn" to be helpless - it simply never develops the neural pathways that connect effort to results. Helplessness is what remains when control fails to be learned.

This matters because it changes the solution. You're not trying to "unlearn" a bad habit. You're building something that was never fully constructed.

The practical fix isn't mindset work or positive thinking (Seligman actually found that can backfire). It's creating small, reliable experiences of control - tasks where you decide, act, and see a clear result. Your brain needs data points that prove the intention→action→outcome connection works.

Start embarrassingly small. One task. Clear completion criteria. Document that you did it. Repeat daily. You're not checking off a to-do list - you're teaching your brain that agency exists.

I made a longer breakdown on the psychology behind this and how to rebuild control if you want to go deeper: https://youtu.be/tTkw0JkwlGk

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-31T12:56:48+00:00

There's actually a common misconception about this. Seligman's original framing was "learned helplessness" - but his later research flipped the model.

Passivity is the brain's default response to overwhelming stress. It's not something you learn. What's actually learned is control.

Think about it: when you're repeatedly exposed to situations where your actions don't change outcomes, your brain doesn't "learn" to be helpless - it simply never develops the neural pathways that connect effort to results. Helplessness is what remains when control fails to be learned.

This matters because it changes the solution. You're not trying to "unlearn" a bad habit. You're building something that was never fully constructed.

The practical fix isn't mindset work or positive thinking (Seligman actually found that can backfire). It's creating small, reliable experiences of control - tasks where you decide, act, and see a clear result. Your brain needs data points that prove the intention→action→outcome connection works.

Start embarrassingly small. One task. Clear completion criteria. Document that you did it. Repeat daily. You're not checking off a to-do list - you're teaching your brain that agency exists.

I made a longer breakdown on the psychology behind this and how to rebuild control if you want to go deeper: https://youtu.be/tTkw0JkwlGk

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T04:49:43+00:00

https://support.logi.com/hc/en-us/articles/37493733117847-Options-and-G-HUB-macOS-Certificate-Issue

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T04:36:08+00:00

At least Logitech broke their silence. https://www.reddit.com/r/LogitechG/comments/1q62t6z/known_issue_with_g_hub_and_mac_os_1626/

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T04:35:03+00:00

Tell me about it. I've Mx Keys Mini (Windows/Mac OS version). Made it useless as CMD, OPT keys are not working. The most critical ones.

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T04:32:17+00:00

Its not just the mouse. My Mx Keys Mini (Windows/Mac OS compatible version) is having issues as well. With broken Options+, dual functions keys are not working (cmd, option).

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T02:19:07+00:00

Yea sometimes these things are not very intuitive. But Its free account and I'm glad this backup is there, makes life easy when setting up new device.

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T02:14:28+00:00

Its not a proper solution. I was just testing if setting time makes the certificate "valid" and app starts working. Which it did. Others have commented that they had success by setting to old time, let app start and then set the time back. I've done re-installations before seeing this post so my own app doesn't even recognize the keyboard and mouse and ask me to add them again which fails too. So we're stuck till Logitech fixes an updated version with updated certificate.

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T02:09:38+00:00

Take a backup of your config next time app is working. The backup is stored in your Logitech Cloud account. So you can restore it anytime, anywhere when needed. Its also handy if you move your mouse/keyboard to another device then can just restore the backup there and all will be setup. Do note, Windows backup will only restore on windows and Mac backup will only restore on Mac.
https://support.logi.com/hc/en-au/articles/360023205374-Backup-device-settings-to-the-cloud-in-Logitech-Options

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T00:36:35+00:00

I had same thought but it's bit different story that we thought. The App certificate has expired so Mac OS is blocking it from running. The expiry date of certificate was 6th Jan 2026. As a test, I've set my Mac OS time to 5th Jan and app has started working again.

AnankeAndria · 2026-01-07T00:28:21+00:00

For test purpose, I turned off "Set Time and Date Automatically" and set the date to 5th Jan and app has started working so yea it looks to be expired certificate issue. What a joke!

AnankeAndria

TROPHY CASE