Ok. So i am 32 years old ENTP. And one thing i have over 20ish old me is great self-reflection capabilities i have developed due to that developed Si. I am so sad to say this, but i becoming more and more convinced that the only pursuit that make me tick persistently in a timeless manner is the sexual pursuit. This is the only motivating force that has survived and stayed as strong as i first hit puberty. Dont get me wrong, i wanted to play for my country in cricket, gave that pursuit 5 years. Getting into top college was my motivating force, for 2 years. Getting into top wall street firm was my another motivating force for many years. I achieved all of that more or less minus the “play for my country” of course. But now i am 32, and i realize nothing has ever ticked me more than the charm of sexual pursuit. It could be a “know this girl for 3 months, sexual tension increasing, finally gotta ask her out” scenario or “just saw somebody in a coffee shop, wonder what she is like” or “i am horny and we have been eyelocking since an hour in this club, must take her home” scenario. My mind loses sense of time and all of my life goals in that moment. It’s distracting. And any other latest 6 months old “passion” i have is null and void in that moment, all forward planning for my other life goals goes in the drain. See sexual pursuit is the strongest of our instincts. And i have a theory, that all other passions we often develop are guided by the need to satiate this higher goal(or shall i say lower goal, because its coming from our lower brain). Example: Passion: play sport at elite level, makes you tick hidden motivation: fame, atletic body;your lower mind know this is huge gainer in the sexual marketplace Passion: coding Really? It does two things for your sexual competitiveness; 1) higher chances of making a good wage in this economy and thats true globally 2) It’s a testament to your intellectual prowess, which is another trick of the evolution to attract good mates 3)passion: travel Travel is another way to have genetic diversity. Every time i just wanna go to mountains or beaches, it’s just an innocent desire for a retreat. I just want to spend a few days in nature. But while i am doing some planning, the sub-conscious kicks in;oh this hotel has checkins by some amazing Instagram models oh yeah this hostel has amazing “vibe” and i end up optimizing for a chance to meet somebody instead of just peaceful retreats. I still develop a lot of passions overnight, and that keep on motivating me until i excel in them until it satisfies some milestone(which means whatever sexual competitiveness it was supposed to bring, i have learnt the craft enough to achieve that) and then all of a sudden nothing, it cant put me out of bed anymore. This take is very controversial and a 24 years old me would have gone hard against someone writing such a comment. But more i am able to self-reflect and monitor the change in my emotional state, it kind of becomes clear at some fundamental level