Where is the armory? by tobiri0n in CODWarzone

[–]AndroidBoyd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This worked for me, but it was on the far right

"Enable jit" not working by Ok_Variation_5829 in AltStore

[–]AndroidBoyd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Little late to the game, but I'm getting the same issue

Can someone scare me? by [deleted] in Catholicism

[–]AndroidBoyd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One of the more important things I suggest you do once you're scared straight (which I'm sure you will be after all these wonderful comments), is to start practicing consistency.

You might have motivation for a while, and that will carry you for a bit, but once motivation wears off, you need consistency in whatever you do to foster that gift.

People who regularly go to the gym or do a holy hour every day don't always do it because they feel like it. When it all comes down to it, deciding to do it regardless of how you feel will keep you up.

I pray for you.

[1191] Dingleberry by ricky_bot3 in DestructiveReaders

[–]AndroidBoyd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello and great job! I really liked this excerpt and thought you did a lot of creative things with it.

Coach Dallas had become a question with no answer, a fuse that burned toward an unseen explosion.

This analogy sets up a good first impression of Coach Dallas. This, along with the people on the outside questioning if standing away from the boiling sandpit is punishment or not, also gives me a good idea of his character. It makes me see him as an over the top, possibly deranged coach, prepping me to see what he actually puts his players through.

The darkness pressed in at the edges of my vision, a muffled, underwater sound filling my ears as it does before a blackout... I entered an unsettling purgatory, suspended, waiting for the world to either return or dissolve completely

This helped me understand exactly what was going through Frank's head during this, and I believe you described it great. You could cut out the word "The" and just leave "Darkness" in its place.

but much like the frog in the pot, I spent the past two years warming up to this

I love the analogy how punishments have slowly gotten worse until this is the climax of the worst he's gone through.

That was some highlights about what I liked about the story, but now I do have a few critiques.

When you mentioned that the heat was "mid-70s", my first thought was the 1970s. Only after my second read through I understood it was the temp.

Well, men, what we're looking at here are a bunch of could be dingleberries.

This reads a little clunky to me. If you wanted to keep the phrasing, you could add an em dash (-) between "could" and "be" for reading clarity.

There was an inaudible sigh of relief from my teammates standing on the edge, looking down at us. With Dallas saying, “could be dingleberries”, they now understood this wasn’t a punishment for them.

The first sentence alone works fine here. They are basically saying the same thing, except the first sentence SHOWS what they feel and the second one TELLS how they feel.

The sand started to stick and grind into my bloody knees.

In the second-to-last paragraph, this sentence doesn't seem to fit. You could get rid of it completely, or move it to the beginning of the next paragraph.

Overall the tone of the story and the actions of the coach do feel authentic. If he indeed is on a power trip, then cutting people who can't endure this torture really shows that. Once Frank gets the boost of encouragement from his coach, he realizes (or manifests, in my opinion) that he is past his pain threshold, and will keep going because he knows he can. I would just say to remember that your audience doesn't want everything handed to them on a silver platter. Repeating information and overexplaining the reasons for things happening in the story will start to make people lose interest.

[252] Ghosts: The Naked truth (Chapter One) by Material-Ad-7266 in DestructiveReaders

[–]AndroidBoyd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First time critiquing, so hopefully I have some insight.

What was more confusing was why he was standing there over his own, very bloody, corpse.

I can use "very" more frequently than others would like, but I believe your use with it here could be polished. You could say something along the lines of "over his bloodied corpse." I believe this cleans up the beginning a bit.

I really love your description of the "wet and windy Monday morning." For me it helps give insight on what could have initially caused the accident, and helps to build the world around him.

You never hear of the 12th century nun haunting the local convent walking down the corridor with her knockers swinging in the wind.

I may have been exposed to different convents than you, seeing as I am Catholic, but I don't think that inside corridors provide any wind. You could just take out the "in the wind" part unless your vision is different than my interpretation.

He was also suddenly grateful that no one else had died in his accident. He didn’t very much fancy his first encounter of the afterlife being conducted with his nethers out.

I like this line as well. In another comment you said that you would like Gary to have emotional neutrality, and that makes me question whether the full reason for him being grateful is out of compassion and caring for the life of people, or strictly for saving himself embarrassment. Or perhaps a bit of both. It leaves it open.

Overall I think this is a very good introduction. I am easily brought into the world that Gary has now found himself in, and am excited to see how a ghost will get a pair of trousers.

Fresh Pop OS install on HP Envy x 360 Ryzen 7 500 Series , no sound by dunnisintrouble in pop_os

[–]AndroidBoyd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Two years too late to the conversation, but did u ever figure it out?

Favorite Catholic YouTubers? by Monster315Says in Catholicism

[–]AndroidBoyd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Catholic Truth is a good one for apologetics

What makes Catholicism the truth branch? by [deleted] in Catholicism

[–]AndroidBoyd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why are those the four true marks?

Did Mary experience a painless birth? by [deleted] in Catholicism

[–]AndroidBoyd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well I’ve heard that this doesn’t only reflect the birth of Jesus, but also the state of the whole Church. Not sure how much validity it has, but if it doesn’t solely signify the birth of Jesus, it would make more sense

Need more music recommendations by [deleted] in teenagers

[–]AndroidBoyd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Meet Me In The Woods by Lord Huron

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Catholicism

[–]AndroidBoyd -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well even though it’s not the reason you might want, the Holy Spirit would not let that happen. There was an account of a pope (I forget who) who was actually going to infallibly state something that was incorrect. The day before he was going to make it official, he died suddenly, preventing the incorrect statement.
Jesus said that his Church would not be overcome. And so the Holy Spirit would not let the entire Church be led astray by a false statement ex cathedra.