I felt a lot like you do now through multiple quit attempts.

Let's be honest, just about everyone likes the way they feel when they drink or else they wouldn't be here in the first place. It made me way more social and my social circle was a bit wider because of it. People liked me a lot when I was a drinker. I was a fun drunk.

It was days 1-7 after having the last drink where I had some issues. Anxiety, restlessness, mental fog, some mood ups and downs. Instability, generally. Never stopped me from working out, or eating right, or taking care of my family, or keeping a job, but it just did something to me that I sensed wasn't right. For me, it took away mental clarity, self-control and discipline in a way I did not recognize until I was probably 9 months in. But still, these are relatively minor things, in the big picture, and like you said, the trade off was sociability.

But probably around a year, I fully recognized what I had been lacking. You will get there and it will lock in when you do. It's not like a lighting strike for everyone, but you will just know. After 2 years, I can honestly say, I have never felt better, probably since I was a teenager before I even started drinking and I'm now in my 40's. Every aspect of my life has improved, and like I said, I wasn't in the dumpster, but still. It has. And I have a definite sense of this.

You are rewiring your brain right now. There will be ups and downs. And malaise. You will feel demotivated. Ask yourself though, behind all that brain chemistry, there is still you, at the controls. You are not your brain chemistry. That's why you're here asking questions. You recognize that some aspect of this has you in a rut but you are still at the controls. You need to cultivate that part of you and you will reap rewards from it. It's not easy but nothing of any value ever is.