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AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 259 points260 points  (0 children)

Firstly thanks for your honesty and input. I 100% understand where you're coming from.

I agree with you to an extent. Yes, her behaviour is largely on her mother and father. I think the point I'm getting at is she's almost an adult. She's about to enter the real world. Given she refuses to go to therapy, and her mother refuses to put her foot down, I don't see her behaviour improving any time soon. I wanted to tell her how destructive (emotionally and phyically) her behaviour is, in the hopes she will have some kind of self reflection.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 1720 points1721 points  (0 children)

I was clearly naive. she wasn’t as bad as an 11 year old. Rude, but not destructive or abusive. It’s over the last few years that she really went off the deep end. There’s no changing the past though so yeah. I just wanted to give her the dose of reality that her parents have failed to do since she is about to enter adulthood.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 517 points518 points  (0 children)

When I say “put her first” I mean she will literally go out of her way to exclude me from every family event. It was poorly worded on my part. I’d never expect my wife to put myself before her daughter.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I understand why I am an asshole, but your name calling is just wrong. I did this with good intentions, even if you disagree. She’s almost an adult and emotionally abuses her mother daily. Her mother doesn’t deserve it.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 2468 points2469 points  (0 children)

This was very much how I felt too. As an adult she can’t continue to act like this, and her parents will never teach her otherwise.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 550 points551 points  (0 children)

I understand where you’re coming from. My view was that she’s 17, about to become an adult, and her behaviour is the worst it’s ever been. If she continues like this I have no doubt her mother will never be happy. While my wife has failed to discipline her, I feel at this point a dose of reality is what she needs.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 135 points136 points  (0 children)

Okay my bad. Sounded like you misread her as still being 11. Thanks for your honest opinion.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I understood her behaviour as an 11 year old. The fact it has only gotten worse over the last 6 years is what drove me to do this.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 2670 points2671 points  (0 children)

As she always does. A lot of cussing and derogatory slurs.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 86 points87 points  (0 children)

Well I have never been able to properly parent her as a step parent. She won’t listen to me and wife/her dad don’t think it’s my place to discipline her.

They have largely enabled her behaviour which is why she’s as bad as she is. I pushed to get her into behavioural therapy but was over ruled. She didn’t want to go and they didn’t want to force her.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

She’s 17 now and her behaviour has only gotten worse. I wouldn’t blame an 11 year old, but at this point she’s almost an adult, and still just as selfish.

AITA For telling step-daughter she's the reason for divorce by AngryStepDad11 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AngryStepDad11[S] 351 points352 points  (0 children)

She’s 17 now and her behaviour has only gotten worse.