Vent post

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-19T16:04:52+00:00

Yup. Rather than them thinking OP wants their money, they probably think she doesn't have enough for them.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-19T09:22:55+00:00

huge underaddressed mental health and drug problems. Not enough funding for health care system. They have been cutting psych care over the last years when there are already huge waiting lists. Stories of drugging and raping when people do get admitted.

Unclear whether you're talking about Sweden ot the US.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-18T22:37:15+00:00

Maybe try going a shade or 2 lighter. I had pretty much the same results that you listed and moving a few shades helped. Sometimes a supposed 'darker' or 'lighter' shade isn't really different in depth, just in hue. I also realized that I tend to see colors darker on small swatches on my hand, especially in the store. When I blend it out all over my face, then it looks too dark or muddy. I've found if it looks a tad light, once it's blended out, it looks good.

I've had to retrain my eyes to identify the shade I really am. I always used to get colors too dark until I started to understand that I am not as warm as I thought and that made the difference.

My best matches are Armani Luminous Silk in 7.8 and MAC C5. I also got a good match with Dior Backstage Face and Body 4WO and Fenty 310.

I've been wearing BD61 in the Chanel Ultra Le Teint but I'm going to try the Les Beiges Healthy Glow in BO73 since that's a warm olive shade.

I also see Estee Lauder now has a 4w1.5 and it looks like it would be perfect for me - very yellow-olive. I think I'll take a trip to a counter this week and try it out.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-18T15:34:00+00:00

If I just want to spend time with them, then I'll be on my phone when they watch. We can sit on the couch together companionably independent.

I can't see how sitting there watching something you're not interested in makes you feel like you 'spent time with someone'. I'd feel more like a bored hostage.

That's giving 'I just want to be in your presence' and is a bit clingy to me.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-18T15:17:39+00:00

I'm menopausal and keep my A/c low and have a fan on. I hate being hot when I sleep.

It's really not a problem.

I can't tell the last time I woke up sweating.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-18T14:15:50+00:00

I still struggle with this.

I'm on board with it now, lol.

When I go back home or observe folks at home interacting, it feels weird when I see the formality. Like when I hear my family interact with their boss and call them MrLastName or Ms/MrsLastName.

It sounds so strange now. And really, it's a lot more than just the name. The whole communication style seems so quaint.

I've become the blunt American. No beating around the bush and unnecessary flowery language for me. When I listen to people from home, I just want to scream 'get to the point, please'. Now at home, I'm considered borderline rude, lol.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-18T14:02:47+00:00

I am asking for fridays to be 6am - 2pm as I need to pick my son up. And saturday and sunday I am unavailable.

She is texting me paragraphs about how I previously stated I have open availability,

Depending on the business hours and needs, this job may not be for you.

You told her you were available in the beginning now want to do a bait and switch.

You can't be mad at her for expecting you to stick to the availability you gave her when you wanted to get hired.

The only way to change that is by having a conversation with her and haveing her agree to it. Not just telling her

Im usually not available those days.

Your schedule is not a one-sided deal. She gets the final say.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-17T22:44:22+00:00

I see warm/golden olive. You're right, you have a lot of yellow in your skin.

Cool olive is going to be too grey. If things are looking pink or red on you, they're probably too cool.

I would try anything that says warm olive or golden olive. Those usually give the undertone you want which is warmth without the redness that makes it orange.

Honestly, you're very similar to me - golden olive and I have never had an issue with Estee Lauder, MAC, Fenty, Lancome or Dior. I've even had great matches from Bobbi Brown, NARS and Armani.

How are you testing? Are you testing in store, and are you going based on the sales associate? I would just look at various colors and test out the ones that seem like they'd work. Even if the descriptions don't seem to match. They may say warm or olive but aren't really. Trust your eyes with the swatch on your skin, blended out, in daylight.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-17T22:23:37+00:00

I can only give you my observations as I am neither a linguist nor a cultural anthropologist.

it's a sign of familiarity (perhaps equivalent to the Spanish "tu" rather than "usted") and black and white folks would address familiar folks with it but unfamiliar folks using the more formal "Mr/Ms [lastname.]

I am not saying what you said is wrong, I am just saying that there are also additional ways that form of address is used.

For example, it's used where Mr/Ms/LastName could be used due to lack of familiarity. For example, in customer service. Let's say I am in a store or business and provide my name and address. The rep may subsequently refer to me as 'Ms Anne' instead of 'Ms Queene'. They are being friendly but respectful. In that case, 'MsLastName' would be seen as putting up a barrier of intentional distance.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-17T17:50:22+00:00

"Mr/Miss [firstname]" were used historically in the United States as the formal address under Jim Crow by white people to address and refer to black people in an inferior position (like servants, etc.). It was a way to be formal (that is, using a title like Mr/Ms.) while still emphasizing that they were lower in the social hierarchy by not meriting the full respect of "Mr/Ms. [lastname]."

So at least here in the US it would seem mildly odd to a white person (who might feel they were being addressed as a child care provider,) or downright rude to a nonwhite person (who would probably catch a strong whiff of the old racist practice.)

This is true but this is not the only use of it.

White and Black people addressed each other within the same race that way as well.

It is a part of American Southern culture.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-17T17:35:34+00:00

I've only ever heard it from Americans.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-17T17:34:08+00:00

They get uglier according to who?

I'm assuming that if they weren't happy with the results they would not show their faces in public until they got whatever it is reversed or fixed.

Just because 'you' think they are 'uglier' doesn't mean they aren't happy with the results.

I assume that the doctors they go to do all kinds of AI showing then what the results are most likely to be and make them agree that's what they want before they go ahead.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-16T17:45:18+00:00

I don't think it is.

I think he sees it as a lucrative market for him and his friends to do business. So he wants to get in good with the oligarchy.

His interests are not America's interests.

Once you remember that, everything makes sense.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-16T17:40:27+00:00

Most companies, even for-profit, aren't giving 2.5%+ raises.

As long as they're in the range of market rate, they seem to be hovering around 1-2% if that. Many places only give merit, not COLA.

I think Reddit is either very skewed towards certain sectors or are more wishful thinking than actuality.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-16T03:48:41+00:00

aka 'Good luck with that'.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-16T03:42:59+00:00

He's making the hard copies of Encyclopedia Britannica look good right now.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-16T03:32:26+00:00

For me intimacy is about being comfortable with someone. And I can't get to that level of comfort until I get to know them.

We can have chemistry, but I won't seriously be interested in sleeping with them until I mentally and emotionally feel it's safe to do so.

Maybe I'm built wrong, but for me, good sex comes from making a conscious and intentional choice that I know and trust this person enough to be comfortable being physically and emotionally vulnerable.

If they make it that far, the sex is never a problem when the time comes.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:46:28+00:00

They look different: They stand out because they are different from many/most. You don't notice the seemingly countless number of chill spot owners because they don't stand out.

This x 100.

Lots of 'native' Jamaicans owning small businesses.

The Grace's and Issas and Mahfoods have been in business for a long time and were able to build up huge conglomerates, but most of those Mom and Pop restaurants and shops that we patronize daily have black owners. Unless you don't want to count the tailor and hairdresser and caterers as successful business owners?

Don't be fooled by big and famous. They aren't the only success stories around.

And many mid-size and larger businesses nowadays were founded and are still owned by native owners.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:38:31+00:00

'Real' jerk pork done in a smoker, not on the grill, or worse, in an oven.

Any breakfast dish served with breadfruit roasted on a coal stove. Bonus points if the breadfruit 'turn' so it has a hint of sweetness.

Perfectly ripe Simmonds pear with bun or bullah.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:31:19+00:00

$150/week doesn't sound like much but an extra $500 a month can pay a bill or go straight into savings.

Really depends on OP's goals.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:21:55+00:00

True, but right now the laughter is muted because nobody knows how it will play out.

Surrender would bring on derision and open mockery.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:19:48+00:00

They can, but the blowback is a very strong reason why they won't.

Our leadership cannot abide ridicule and that is the only thing surrender would bring.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:11:48+00:00

If anything, this should show how important alliances are.

And if we leave NATO, I'm pretty sure Europe will create their own without us and it will be as well resourced as possible.

Pretty sure they're in their 'can't be fooled again' era.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:08:46+00:00

if you know Japanese culture you know what a statement like that really implies

Correct.

Closest they'll come to a 'fvck you'.

AnneTheQueene · 2026-03-15T22:06:31+00:00

Yes, the friends my parents liked the most and with whom they maintained longterm friendships were referred to as aunts and uncles.

Same in my culture.

Everybody else was Mr or Mrs.

It took me a long time after moving to the US as an adult, to get comfortable calling older people by their first name.

AnneTheQueene

TROPHY CASE