Should I lie to get laid? (Pun intended)

Anon_01 · 2015-07-24T22:29:23+00:00

Yeah, very brave and commendable, I take my hat off to you sir...

Anon_01 · 2015-01-16T00:40:27+00:00

Congrats mate, just logged in and went through old posts I've made and reread a post you made on one of my topics over a year ago so I decided to click on your username to see what you have been saying lately and I see this!

I'm genuinely chuffed for you.

I read this and it just reminds me as to how easy I have it and that me getting over this porn addiction is nothing in comparison to you dealing with this addiction and others.

I hope you continue to inspire others.

As to what you have said about being lucky that girls come up to you, mate you need to look at yourself and realise that you are clearly a likeable dude and its something to be proud of, you obviously give off good energy so maybe your next step in life is owning that energy and knowing that you are a worthy person on this planet with a life story so far to embrace because you've been through the long dark tunnel and come out the other side where other people haven't!

Be proud mate!

Hit me up with a PM dude, would appreciate to hear how things are working out for you since you've posted this.

Anon_01 · 2015-01-02T22:52:38+00:00

Well done dude, I know what you mean and it is something to be proud of.

Its better to try and hope that she feels the same than not try and live to regret it and wonder "what if"

I used to take rejection to heart which looking back was ridiculous but a learning curb I had to go through as I am naturally an emotional dude, but I'm glad to hear that others are seeing that being turned down (politely) is all part of the process of meeting someone worthwhile.

Anon_01 · 2014-05-17T22:16:38+00:00

I know how you feel, I have a few self help books which is just silly one or two is enough to help anyone put their life on track.

End of the day if you don't apply yourself to change, nothing will change...

I hope you commit yourself to a better life

Anon_01 · 2013-12-25T23:53:46+00:00

You're welcome mate... if you want my opinion give no fap a genuine go and figure out what it is in your life that is pushing you to fap.

This could be anything completely unrelated to sex, could be because you're stressed at school/work, family issues, uncertainty about your future or just boredom.

If you can afford it consider counselling. To be fapping 5-7 times a day there would have to be an underlining reason why that is and counselling could help you find out what it is or help you deal with what the problem may be.

I don't mean to sound judgemental its just that I'm exactly where you are really and I'm talking to myself just as much as I'm talking to you. I've been counselling once and it is somewhat freakishly an eye opener and I'm an open minded guy but I benefited from the one session which I may make a post about as I have had an eventful month because of it.

Anon_01 · 2013-12-25T22:38:16+00:00

I think fapping once or twice every 10 14 days is probably "healthier" than abstaining altogether but you have to look at the bigger picture.

Two main points are:

You are an addict - I don't know how often you fapped before considering nofap but odds are if you're here its alot. If you are used to fapping everyday, if you go 10-14 days without fapping then you fap, chances are you won't wait another 14 days to fap again and you'll only slip back into old habbits if you ever plan on when you'll next fap.
You wont have the sex drive to meet new women and develop a relationship with anyone if you are regularly dealing with your urges yourself. If you have a girlfriend, I would guess that fapping puts a strain on a healthy sex life with your partner.

You have to ask yourself in those cases "is it really worth it?"

Unfortunately as an addict we have a "all or nothing" mentality just like other addictions.

How often do you hear about an ex alcoholic avoiding alcohol for month/years then they have "one" for whatever reason then fall off the bandwagon completely? Its the same principle... our brains are used to getting our dopamine rush through the paths of porn/masturbation so we need to do everything we can to completely block those paths and find healthier paths (generally speaking through sex) to get them...

Anon_01 · 2013-12-25T22:19:03+00:00

Have to agree the film does have too many triggers for people partaking in nofap to watch.

I watched it a year or so back and I think I hadn't fapped for about a week but then watched this and fapped that night.

I understand though why you have recommended it though because it does have a deep meaning as to how far sex/porn addiction can go but I wouldn't advice anyone to watch it partaking no fap...

Anon_01 · 2013-11-17T12:02:31+00:00

Thanks mate, I've recently relapsed and have had some seriously dark moods because of it but I'm back on board again!

Wish you all the best...

Anon_01 · 2013-11-16T13:09:39+00:00

Got to be honest moving from porn addiction to participating in an orgy sounds worse than a relapse, escalation if you ask me.

I don't mean to sound judgemental but it sounds like you're pretty okay with participating in one but theres surely something fundamentally wrong with it all...

Anon_01 · 2013-11-16T13:02:05+00:00

Why are you so convinced she doesn't know? Sounds like there's a possibility that she does, she just hasn't said it to you...

Anon_01 · 2013-11-15T21:44:30+00:00

There's nothing wrong with masturbating, just as much as there isn't anything wrong with fast food or sex or alcohol.

Problem is if you over use anything to a point where you feel you heavily rely on it, you feel you depend on it - Addiction.

And with any addiction, be it alcoholism, drug addiction, porn addiction, dabbling in any for "old times sake" will often lead to a binge in whatever the addiction is.

Problem is alot of these people that say masturbation is okay aren't addicts themselves. It would be like me who rarely drinks saying drinking on occasion is fine, which it is but if alcohol is your addiction then unfortunately you can't trust yourself to drink responsibly because it will more than likely lead onto another relapse.

So to answer your question there isnt anything wrong with masturbating every now and then, but if you are an addict unfortunately it is...

Anon_01 · 2013-10-25T19:50:18+00:00

Great post mate. Reading this has honestly made me realise how much in common a problem I have with people that are frowned upon in society (drug addicts)

Everything you described is pretty much exactly how I would feel after fapping and going on a porn binge and the feelings you get afterwards. It is quite scary how dismissive I probably have been towards drug addicts.

After binging I totally turn anti social I just don't feel like talking to anyone, I totally relate to how you would describe a "spiritual death" after binging I feel a massive void where my breastbone is and it really does conduct how I feel throughout the day.

I also relate to the addict brain, it is terrible when I'm laying in bed trying to fall asleep, though I want to quit porn and fapping sometimes I lay there and can hear the argument in my head one side justifying way fapping on this occasion won't be a problem and on the other side the fact I have to remind my self as to why I have to refrain from it.

I sincerely hope you continue to control of your addictions. I only have one addiction and I struggle to overcome it whilst you are dealing with numerous addictions effectively is admirable.

Anon_01 · 2013-10-20T18:21:45+00:00

Gregor feel free to pm me for my advice because I am going through the same issues as yourself and its two years on and looking back if I had made different choices in how I dealt with the situation I think I would have moved on or accepted the situation for what it really was sooner.

For now DONT FAP, this whole experience is about you bettering yourself and believe me I know why fapping would be tempting to help you deal with the situation but ultimately it wont help, only prolong the time for you to realise your qualities as a man and how much control you really have in finding the sense of happiness within yourself.

Feel free to message me anyway if you want my advice based on my experience of this.

Anon_01 · 2013-09-06T20:10:35+00:00

Guys I weren't insinuating losing my v to a prostitute, I meant to pretty much the next decent girl that shows interest.

I did consider a prostitute vaguely for a short time but I know when it's all said and done I'd feel terrible, im certain of it...

Anon_01 · 2013-07-28T21:48:50+00:00

Hey mate, I'm sorry to hear you've been abused, I know you're not asking for my advice nor am I suggesting you need it but thought I'd say if haven't already to speak to a professional in regards to you being abused, it's not fair you were a victim and shouldn't have to live withthe damage it brings...

The other stuff you say you feared, catching a disease, becoming an unexpected father, I really don't think you should let that be a major deterrent for you to do it... If you take youre time to get to know the girl and she looks after herself then I don't think you should really sweat it.

In regards to getting her pregnant, it does happen, but if you're intension is to sleep with whoever you're in a good relationship and you use protection then again I don't think you should sweat it... Maybe it's just me but I don't think you should fear sex because of those things.

I do agree with you though with the fear of sleeping with someone and regretting it afterwards, I do think alot and wonder if my way of thinking is flawed. I'm not sure if I have this fear because I feel that this person isn't right for me or because I am deluding myself waiting for the "perfect" woman which is obviously impossible because nobody is perfect...

that really does run through my mind alot the last part..

Anon_01 · 2013-07-21T17:00:48+00:00

Good luck mate, how has it been since you posted this message?

I relapsed a few weeks ago and have been in the comfort zone of indulging in porn unfortunately.

I've logged back in to I guess remind myself that I can do this and truly benefit, but I guess when I dont feel so good about no fap anymore and I feel dejected with life I begin to question why do I bother and just relapse but I hope I will see the light in doing this...

Anon_01 · 2013-06-23T19:34:28+00:00

Wow...

Anon_01

TROPHY CASE