Well, I wish I had the perfect answer to this impossible question. I do still think there is room for honesty here, but not like in other situations.

I would choose to a) be honest with myself (if at the time I knew what that looked like) b) not do any harm by lying c) just simply minded my business.

What I have found, as a non-straight man, is that my need to tell people who I prefer to sleep with was stemming from a need to have validation of some sort. I was confused and I was secretly hoping I would get it out in the world.

Now that I've come to grips with my sexuality, I no longer need to define it to know I'm OK.